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2015 was a year of really strange coincidences for me. This past weekend was no exception. I met a lady at a Latin dance club (salsa, tango, etc.). We danced and talked a bit before exchanging contact information.
The very next day we communicated via text and agreed to go out later this week. The very same night we texted and discussed going out I went out to a different Latin dance club. Well, who did I run into there? The very same lady I met the night before! To some degree a very awkward situation.
She was surprised to see me and said something like, "Hey you didn't tell me you were going out tonight." Well, she never asked me either! In fact, about 20 minutes before I arrived at the club she texted me this, "Ok. Good night." Certainly sounds like someone about to go to bed. So I replied with the same, "Good night."
I live very close to the club. She lives quite a distance away and it was a weeknight so I was surprised to see her there too! A buddy of mine was quick to say, "She will flake for sure if she saw you there hitting on other women." Well, I was not doing that, certainly not when she saw me.
So we danced a few songs together and then she danced with some other guys. As she should, we were not on a date. I danced with one other lady as well. I called it a night on the early side since I had to work the next morning. Before I left I found her with her friends and said goodbye. Left it on a positive note: nice to see you, have fun and look forward to seeing you later this week.
I know meeting people in this type of environment is hit or miss. The first night we met she did say she thinks most guys are players and that trust had to be demonstrated/earned. What are the chances she flakes...? I say very high, especially since I posted about it, never a good sign.
Someone just flaked on me. New word to me in dating world. I felt he was going to flake on me before he even did it. I just put up with it just to see, if for once, my cynical 6th sense could be proven wrong. Nope.
Why awkward? Just because you want to go out with someone doesn't mean you're obligated to take her out the very next available moment you have. The next available night you had, you already had plans - the second dance club. She happened to be there. You didn't mention what your plans were pre-your scheduled date since you two have only JUST met and it was the same from her side, so...?
Who knows if she'll flake, but if she does over this specifically, then I don't think it's a huge loss...you're getting out there, dancing and meeting people so that's a good thing.
Ok: one more not so minor detail. After I saw initially saw her she said, "Ok. I am going to catch up with my friends but let's dance later." I said, "Sounds good." She walked away.
This club is actually a tiny little place that packs in a crowd like sardines. To the point that you are literally standing shoulder to shoulder with people. Well, right after she walked away I said hello to a lady that was standing near me. Made small talk about what she was drinking, etc. Perhaps 2 minutes of small talk and that was it. Did not ask her to dance or anything else. Had no romantic interest in her (though she was not ugly). Was just small talk.
As I said my goodbyes to the lady I know I noticed the lady mentioned above was among her group of friends standing behind her. Was kind of loud to say anything much at all so I did not say anything to her friend or mention I had talked to her. Am I overthinking all of this?
You're allowed to talk to other human beings, relax. Either she'll flake or she won't. If she does, it might be more due to the fact that you acted socially awkward & were clearly uncomfortable she was at the second dance club, rather than just playing it cool.
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