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After he just threatened my family and researched their address? Forget all the crap he was talking to me, that's a line that in no way gets the turn the other cheek card. No, there will be (righteous) retribution--it's just a matter of what's the right degree. I know the police route is the best thing to do, and then just drop it, but I'm not so sure a confrontation isn't exactly unwarranted, either. That's why I'm here--I'm truly angry and conflicted.
ANYbody can look up relatives. There's nothing special about "his" threat to you that makes it ok for you to seek some romanticized "retribution."
This isn't The Godfather. No need for carpet bombing or flexing your manliness.
You can't "beat" an idiot psycho by becoming one yourself.
Location: Watching half my country turn into Gilead
3,530 posts, read 4,175,298 times
Reputation: 2925
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life
ANYbody can look up relatives. There's nothing special about "his" threat to you that makes it ok for you to seek some romanticized "retribution."
This isn't The Godfather. No need for carpet bombing or flexing your manliness.
You can't "beat" an idiot psycho by becoming one yourself.
This is all true, and I know this. It's just this feeling I have right now--I just don't know how to describe it. Like pure rage that keeps festering, regardless of what I do--and I am not a hothead, at all. I'm really hoping talking with the police later this evening (all things willing, they were swamped yesterday) will help snap me out of it before Friday rolls around. I don't want to be that guy not listening to advice on a forum and whining away, so I am listening, and this is working, thanks. Just keep vacillating between rationality and raw emotion, you know?
After he just threatened my family and researched their address? Forget all the crap he was talking to me, that's a line that in no way gets the turn the other cheek card. No, there will be (righteous) retribution--it's just a matter of what's the right degree. I know the police route is the best thing to do, and then just drop it, but I'm not so sure a confrontation isn't exactly unwarranted, either. That's why I'm here--I'm truly angry and conflicted.
Oh, you are one of those fake, macho-tough guys who has to prove how tough he is.
Location: Watching half my country turn into Gilead
3,530 posts, read 4,175,298 times
Reputation: 2925
Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa
Ask yourself how he got your name in the first place, and was aware of your date.
My fault and I didn't realize it until too late. I have my social media set to private, but I get a lot of requests from musicians and artists and the like trying to make it, so I thought nothing of it. Her giving him my personal phone is a given (for whatever reason--I don't care at this point if it's coerced or not). I'm more concerned with how he got the name of some of my family and associate's names. True, there's Google, but three out of the four names he listed aren't on your standard whitepages search and the like. That has my blood boiling to know end. He must have really gone digging, so I know this guy is serious. Hard to let go easily.
Location: Watching half my country turn into Gilead
3,530 posts, read 4,175,298 times
Reputation: 2925
Quote:
Originally Posted by Just A Guy
Oh, you are one of those fake, macho-tough guys who has to prove how tough he is.
No, not at all. Probably the furthest thing from it, which is why this unfelt-before emotion is eating me alive right now. If he had just kept it to **** talking between me and him, I would have been on my merry way. But he crossed a line into the safety of my family, and that is much harder for me to process right now. This isn't Mike Tyson, "I'm going to eat your children" stupidity. This is researching names and an address and threatening people who have nothing to do with this stupidity. How should I feel?
I'm sorry this happened to you. I can only imagine that you're feeling like she totally fooled you and maybe your pride might be a little wounded. That's understandable.
And this business about threatening your family, I understand the rage about that too. I'm like a mf-ing grizzly bear wherever someone even just upsets one of my family members so I totally get where you're coming from.
But I also know what kind of world we live in today. These are the times of history where a guy who is defending his home from burglers and shoots one of them then gets arrested and later sued by the burglar. Because the world is completely unfair and the only outcome if you actually face to face confront this guy is going to turn out bad for you. You'll end up getting in trouble, arrested, thrown in jail, and you'll have a police report against you. I mean this will not end up in your favor if you try to go see this loser in order to rip his splern through his throat. It's not a good idea.
I know that rage you're feeling. I've felt it myself due to something that my ex BIL did to my sis and one other time when someone made my mom cry and scared over something. Those two times it took every last shred of self control I had not to start ripping people to shreds with my bare hands. And I'm not even a trained fighter. I'm just a middle aged lady who has exactly zero tolerance for anyone who hurts my family. Especially my mom.
Anyway please don't give in to those urges you are having. I guarantee it will backfire on you and you'll being the one in huge trouble. That kind of guy isn't worth risking and ultimately losing everything you've worked really hard to achieve in your life. Trust me. The guy is probably a total ***** who wouldn't last 2 seconds in a fight anyhow. He's just a big talker like so many Internet bullies you may have witnessed from time to time online.
My fault and I didn't realize it until too late. I have my social media set to private, but I get a lot of requests from musicians and artists and the like trying to make it, so I thought nothing of it. Her giving him my personal phone is a given (for whatever reason--I don't care at this point if it's coerced or not). I'm more concerned with how he got the name of some of my family and associate's names. True, there's Google, but three out of the four names he listed aren't on your standard whitepages search and the like. That has my blood boiling to know end. He must have really gone digging, so I know this guy is serious. Hard to let go easily.
They are both nuts. Better you did not get further involved with her. Stay safe OP.
Dating is tough, there are more nuts out there then 20 planters factories.
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