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I have a very good female friend. We've been friends since we were teens.
She had a complicated relationship with a guy who mistreated her and ended up pregnant. He abandoned her when she told him about the baby.
Well, the little boy is now 3 years old and he doesn't really have any male relatives around. My friend's father is not around because he also abandoned her when she was a child and she has no siblings.
The boy is very fond of me and I've also grew attached to him. He knows very well I'm not his father but treats me as his uncle. I always buy him birthday and Christmas presents, sometimes pick him up from kindergarten when my friend has to stay until later in her job and try to ease her life as I can because I know being a single mum is not easy.
Her son always runs to me for a hug whenever I show up, he's a really nice little fella. Always very polite and well behaved.
However, many of my male friends think I have second intentions with his mother. I would never use a child to get a woman, I truly only help her and her son out of friendship.
I have a very good female friend. We've been friends since we were teens.
She had a complicated relationship with a guy who mistreated her and ended up pregnant. He abandoned her when she told him about the baby.
Well, the little boy is now 3 years old and he doesn't really have any male relatives around. My friend's father is not around because he also abandoned her when she was a child and she has no siblings.
The boy is very fond of me and I've also grew attached to him. He knows very well I'm not his father but treats me as his uncle. I always buy him birthday and Christmas presents, sometimes pick him up from kindergarten when my friend has to stay until later in her job and try to ease her life as I can because I know being a single mum is not easy.
Her son always runs to me for a hug whenever I show up, he's a really nice little fella. Always very polite and well behaved.
However, many of my male friends think I have second intentions with his mother. I would never use a child to get a woman, I truly only help her and her son out of friendship.
As long as you and your friend know that, nothing else matters.
People always find a way to judge. Many people think that men and women cannot be platonic friends, and there is a reason for that. Many times one of the friends is secretly holding back feelings for the other friend. There are, of course, exceptions. Only YOU know your true intentions.
Perhaps your male friend are more shallow than you are.
However, you do need to realize that taking on this role in the boy's life is a REALLY big deal, and consider what would happen if you WERE NOT around.
However, this is a bad situation for you. Female companion + no sex = loneliness for you. You need to be spending your time with childless females who can form healthier long term relationships with you. That's a better use of your time.
However, this is a bad situation for you. Female companion + no sex = loneliness for you. You need to be spending your time with childless females who can form healthier long term relationships with you. That's a better use of your time.
Who says I'm alone? I'm currently in a casual relationship, mainly just for sex. It's my style of relationship, no strings attached, no commitment.
Why do you assume spending time with my friend's son is a waste of time? I surely don't feel like that.
It's like Friends. Mark gets Rachel a job that she has no qualifications for. And Ross and Joey state men are only nice to women to get sex. And later in the show, it was revealed Mark did in fact wanna sleep with Rachel.
Or some guys here that state any man who's friends with a woman wants to sleep with her.
Obviously things like that are not true across the board. Some people genuinely are nice without hidden agenda. But the people who are prone to deception believe, or want to, that it's not possible to to do things without personal gain involved, because that's how they are. It's like some people who cheat insist that it's instinct and that everyone cheats on their SO. That's a huge assumption as well.
So some fall into the habit that everyone is like them. Chances are, your friends probably think you wanna sleep with you friend, because that's them. They apparently wouldn't care for another woman's son unless they wanted to get on her good side to sleep with her.
As long as you and the child's Mother are in agreement the opinion of others means nothing. Do what you do and ignore the ignorance of those who do not know the details and really have no business being involved.
However, you do need to realize that taking on this role in the boy's life is a REALLY big deal, and consider what would happen if you WERE NOT around.
I'm very aware of that. I don't see this role as a huge sacrifice, it's a pleasure to be helpful to his mother and to make him happy.
Our friendship has been around for more than 20 years so I would say it's pretty solid.
I'm very aware of that. I see this role as a huge sacrifice, it's a pleasure to be helpful to his mother and to make him happy.
Our friendship has been around for more than 20 years so I would say it's pretty solid.
Sounds like you aren't the one with the problem, then.
Like I said, maybe your friends aren't as evolved as you are.
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