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Good advice. Online is a numbers game, attractive women (and extremely handsome or wealthy men) can get hundreds of emails. They can't answer all of them so they will only answer the ones that they are interested in.
I imagine this happens a lot on boring nights with nothing else to do. I've always said I've gotten my most action from online dating on Sunday nights from 7PM - 10PM. The reality is the weekend is over and anything you had planned to do either happened or it didn't. At that point, you start planning ahead for the next weekend to see if you can make a plan work. There's also just little accountability when you online date as well. You're nothing more than a screen name, picture, and some words on a screen. With how many people who do "studies" online to see who gets more responses, the pretty woman/ugly woman or pretty male/ugly male; it just proves that authenticity is lacking with online dating. It's why women basically give up too. If they're late 20s to early 30s and has some kids by different men, she's showing the viewer that she doesn't pick stable men in her life. Yes, there's women who online date that are widowed, but clearly more just got pregnant by a guy who skipped town. I saw enough profiles in my locale of women who were pregnant, yet trying to date, because they didn't want to be a single mother with one extra mouth to feed.
I'm not saying this to bash women, because clearly men play a major role in the demise of online dating. I'm hear to say that after a certain age, people are kinda set in their ways. What they say they don't like and don't want, is still going to be the things that they gravitate towards, because you just can't teach an old dog new tricks. I very seldom pay attention to what a woman says she wants and doesn't want when I can see that she's had 3 kids and says she's tired of cheaters, liars, and unemployed men. It just tells me that's what she's attracted to and wouldn't know what to do with a guy that actually did treat her the way she wants to be treated. Truth is, she's probably met that guy before, but she's just not attracted to him, and that's perfectly fine.
I imagine this happens a lot on boring nights with nothing else to do. I've always said I've gotten my most action from online dating on Sunday nights from 7PM - 10PM.
The reality is the weekend is over and anything you had planned to do either happened or it didn't. At that point, you start planning ahead for the next weekend to see if you can make a plan work.
In this area, I always got the "boost your profile" and "now's the time to log in! Traffic is heavy" emails from OKC on Wednesday around 8:00 - 9:00 pm, for the same reasons you mentioned above. Last week's dates didn't lead to anything so it's time to set up new ones.
Quote:
Originally Posted by weezerfan84
Yes, there's women who online date that are widowed, but clearly more just got pregnant by a guy who skipped town.
There is a whole different kind of stigma having a profile that states you are widowed. Either people stay away because they don't want to "compete with a ghost," they don't want to acknowledge their own mortality, or they see you're widowed and think you inherited a boat-ton of money or are so lonely you will sleep with anything that moves.
I was getting a pedicure the other day when during the course of polite conversation with another customer, I disclosed I am an accountant and I'm widowed. She offered to give me her phone number so I could date her son because "he really needs to meet a nice girl." Sadly for her, I don't give out my number to people who don't even ask me what my name is. When I declined her offer, she was quite offended!
In this area, I always got the "boost your profile" and "now's the time to log in! Traffic is heavy" emails from OKC on Wednesday around 8:00 - 9:00 pm, for the same reasons you mentioned above. Last week's dates didn't lead to anything so it's time to set up new ones.
There is a whole different kind of stigma having a profile that states you are widowed. Either people stay away because they don't want to "compete with a ghost," they don't want to acknowledge their own mortality, or they see you're widowed and think you inherited a boat-ton of money or are so lonely you will sleep with anything that moves.
I was getting a pedicure the other day when during the course of polite conversation with another customer, I disclosed I am an accountant and I'm widowed. She offered to give me her phone number so I could date her son because "he really needs to meet a nice girl." Sadly for her, I don't give out my number to people who don't even ask me what my name is. When I declined her offer, she was quite offended!
Because most people are so involved in being married or in a long-term relationship that they don't even remember what it's like to be single again, and they can't even fathom what single life would be like. I'm certain the lady suggesting her son came from a good place, she just feels a woman like you shouldn't be single. You have your life in order. There's people out there that never really dated to be honest. They married their high school sweetheart or married someone they met in college. They weren't out dating while trying to work a career, take care of the house, bills, car troubles, family members, etc etc. They accomplished all those milestones with another set of hands around. It's totally different to do those things by yourself and it can truly become draining at times. Independence is nice, but it gets old quick.
I'm certain the lady suggesting her son came from a good place, she just feels a woman like you shouldn't be single.
I think it was more that she doesn't feel her son should be single and "you're single and age appropriate, you'll do." As I said, she didn't even ask my name. Just what I do for a living, what does my husband do, how old I am and how many kids do I have? Nothing about hobbies or interests to assess compatibility. The gal who does my nails said it sounded like she was interviewing me! (I looked at her for help at one point - she was dying of silent laughter).
When I told her I wasn't looking to date right now, she got huffy and told me her son makes $100k a year "so he wouldn't be a mooch," that he's put 3 kids through school (and he's only 39) and all the women in this area are just looking for a handout. So which is it? Am I daughter-in-law material or am I a gold digger?
I think it was more that she doesn't feel her son should be single and "you're single and age appropriate, you'll do." As I said, she didn't even ask my name. Just what I do for a living, what does my husband do, how old I am and how many kids do I have? Nothing about hobbies or interests to assess compatibility. The gal who does my nails said it sounded like she was interviewing me! (I looked at her for help at one point - she was dying of silent laughter).
When I told her I wasn't looking to date right now, she got huffy and told me her son makes $100k a year "so he wouldn't be a mooch," that he's put 3 kids through school (and he's only 39) and all the women in this area are just looking for a handout. So which is it? Am I daughter-in-law material or am I a gold digger?
She sounds like some of the people that post on this forum. Bitter and frustrated!
It's the norm both genders use to blow off someone online.
Yep.
Giving a guy contact info (by contacting him) can feel risky. So I think that is a natural time to bail if you aren't truly interested. But I think you are doing the right thing by taking the chance to move from just messaging to meeting. And in my experience, the longer you wait, the less likely it is to happen at all. I try to make that happen in one to two weeks! No need to keep chatting when I want a flesh and blood man in my life!
Oh, maybe you need to just suggest that you meet for a drink instead of switching to whatsapp?
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