Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
She's taking it slow. Leaving a lot of stuff at your place may make her feel that she is giving up her freedom, which is understandable. I wouldn't push the issue for now. In fact, I'd drop it entirely. She's heard you. While you're "waiting", watch how she behaves, not what she says.
My question is should I actually be happy that she was concerned about taking up my space?
Sure, unless you live in a large place with a generously-sized bathroom, and/or she couldn't look at you when she said it.
She may also be a bit confused about your offer, not knowing whether it might be a tacit gesture towards a greater level of commitment. Unless you've addressed the trajectory of the relationship directly she may just be feeling cautious about your intentions. That doesn't necessarily signal anything bad. It's actually pretty smart.
If you've been dating for several months and she's taken to staying over quite often, I would think you're feeling fairly good about who she is (at least you didn't mention any question about it), so I'd let it go without any more thought for now. If you're creeping up on the one-year mark and she's still not leaving anything at your house, then it's time to wonder a bit more.
OP, why is this even an issue with you? Do you feel rejected just because she didn't want to leave her toothbrush, tampons and other detritus in your bathroom? That's a weird thing to get upset about. I don't even know what kind of "stuff" there would be to leave; unless she uses makeup, hair stuff, and other grooming products (where I come from, there are a lot of women who don't have any of that), there's nothing but a toothbrush and maybe some spare underwear to leave.
I don't understand why people can't be happy with the relationship they have, instead of hunting for petty reasons to get insecure about. She's spending 4 days/week with you. You'd think a person would be thrilled to have a happy, compatible relationship. But no, they have to undermine their own happiness by nitpicking over nothing, and finding hidden negativity behind every nook or cranny.
My boyfriend was like that - leave clothes here so next weekend you won't need to bring anything. Well, how do I know what we're going to do and what I should leave? And what shoes? Etc. etc. He could just have a pair of jeans and a couple shirts but depending on plans, that's not gonna work for a woman. And what if I want to wear what I left at his place THIS week? And makeup is too expensive to buy a whole new set for the boyfriend's place. Be satisfied with toothbrush and tampons!
For the past 6 months I have been dating this girl. Things seem to be going well
She will stay over at my place 3-4 times a week. I told her feel free to leave anything behind
She has before but last time she said "well I don't want to take up your space"
I said "No worries, I have plenty of space, you can always leave stuff behind for next time so you don't have to always carry a bunch of stuff"
My question is should I actually be happy that she was concerned about taking up my space?
She doesn't want you wearing her clothes.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
