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Getting sympathy has its merits, but one should be careful not to rely on it for mental stability.
For example: The LowonLuck/foxy back-and-forth in this thread started to take on a tone of "oh my god, you're right! We're doing everything we're supposed to do! Men are the problem!". Obviously, I'm paraphrasing with a bit of exaggeration, but you get my point.
Men are guilty of this as well, as is seen in how some of the MTGOW threads tend to evolve. Support is fine, but when you rely on that support as justifying whatever no-fault conclusions you're coming to, you shouldn't be too surprised if the cycle continues...because nothing is really changing.
That's not necessarily to POINT fault, either...simply to be wary of using sympathetic support as a crutch in lieu of addressing a potentially REAL problem.
As for others' advice? I like the idea of any sort of personal change, whether it's one's routine, or a makeover, or simply adjusting one's social habits (going to different places, meeting new people, etc.)
I don';t have $$ relationship therapy that's why Im here
Any therapy is better than no therapy. Until you fix the messed up wiring in your head, you will continue to pick messed up guys who don't treat you well.
As far as all the other things (make-over, doing new things, going new and different places, meeting new people, etc), those are fine overall, but none of those things will fix the wiring in your brain.
There is some myth that gay people are somehow genetically fixed as such, but I have never found that to be the case. I wound up doing prostitution for a short stint, by the end of it, I had effectively convinced myself to be into guys.
Went tonight. Probably the 5 or 6 the therapist on 20 years that can't find anything wrong with me. Really this is the last try. It is what it is.
Who are these therapists you go to? Are they "counselors" or degreed professionals (at the minimum a masters or preferably PhD or PsyD). And are you honest or just BS them? Because most of us on here can even see through BS...odd that they can't!
I understand that but when someone you love betrays you, it's hard not to be affected by it greatly.
This may in fact be what happened to your parents. It seems your Dad finds no need anymore to be a good person or "Husband" anymore perhaps from a fall out between your parents.
Now, you are 'blurred in love vision' what is a good relationship.
Your parents background was very helpful in understanding what could be your problem in finding a good husband. I think your Dad's role in the family may have you think men should treat their SO like that.
Idk what to say. I wish you well. Most guys have been evolving into male animals just out to satisfy their desire for lust. This is not entirely their fault as the world around them has taught this is right.
Yeah i always saw red flags early on but ignored it because i thought i "liked them too much" and just told myself everything would be ok. Later on I would tell myself they would change but they never did. I learned my lessons now.
when you become secure in who you are, and what you want, and when you love yourself first, you will not only see these red flags early on, but you will recognize them for what they are right away instead of months down the road.
and when that happens, you will proactively reject these guys long before you get too involved with them.
Nah they are all crap. Some more than others. Just have to find one that you can deal with.
Disparaging, stereotypical comments about men. I am highly offended. Why isn't the moderator jumping on this? If a men said something similar about women, the thread would be locked...
Who are these therapists you go to? Are they "counselors" or degreed professionals (at the minimum a masters or preferably PhD or PsyD). And are you honest or just BS them? Because most of us on here can even see through BS...odd that they can't!
And too, therapy isn't necessarily supposed to be a quick fix to find out what's "wrong" with you. It's supposed to identify behavior patterns and make you aware of how you fall into them and how to guide you in a different direction.
I believe in love, believe that there's someone out there who is just right for me. I just got out of a relationship and working hard to improve myself and am happy to be single. After all my experience I think I still believe I can find love.
I think this also could be a problem. There isn't anyone out there who is "just right for you" right from the start. Being happy in a relationship takes compromise, some trial and error...
There is some myth that gay people are somehow genetically fixed as such, but I have never found that to be the case. I wound up doing prostitution for a short stint, by the end of it, I had effectively convinced myself to be into guys.
What doesn't work is forcing people to change.
But you are free to decide who you are into. If you have had a bad experience with men, definitely see if you're not bi or lesbian. Bottom line? You dictate your happiness, not a man.
I tend to agree with this to some degrees. Especially amongst women. In my late 20's I knew SEVERAL girls who magically one day decided they were lesbians. One of which I had dated seriously. Within a few years they were back to men. Some went "bi" for a while, most all went back straight.
Guys, I don't think this is as much the case. In fact I have not seen anyone personally go back straight.
I think some women get fed up with guys and think the grass is greener on the lez side. Then find out women can be even more moody and have their own issues and realize it's not for them.
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