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Uh huh. And what about the men who avoid driving? Are they also intimidated by tires and batteries?
I already answered your question in the same post you just quoted. Further down you will see that I assume able bodied and financially secure men that do not drive have a DUI history.
I already answered your question in the same post you just quoted. Further down you will see that I assume able bodied and financially secure men that do not drive have a DUI history.
The carless guy I went out with had a license and could drive but he felt like buying a car would be a waste of money since he was getting around fine without one.
The mechanical aspects of owning a car don't bother me a bit. Although I'm an academic, I'm fairly mechanically inclined. Even my mother, who has no mechanical skills whatsoever, has never been intimidated by that aspect of owning a car. She says that's what AAA is for! And i've lent a hand when situations have come up. For me, it's the handling of the vehicle, especially in traffic, where you have to be able to react without error and with lightning speed, judge where other cars are in relationship to your vehicle, and all those sorts of thing, that inspires terror.
And I really don't like cities. I love to visit them and appreciate the cultural life (and the public transportation!), but I grew up in a small New England town and would prefer to live in a less urban environment than I do now. Being cooped up in an apartment with a tiny balcony when you used to be able to roam acres is hard.
Somebody earlier mentioned my cash flow issue. I said I don't have money to spend on a smartphone or Uber. I have a perfectly fine, old-model Tracfone, which I seldom use because I have a phone number and international calling plan via a VOIP service, which allows people to reach me even when I travel out of the country. The only reason I need a smartphone is for Uber. When I looked into them a couple of years ago, the smartphone plans I saw were in the range of $75-100/month. That's probably what it would cost me to go somewhere that I want to go via Uber two or three times a month, which means that smartphone+Uber would cost me $150-300/month.
However, spending that kind of money to do things if I had a boyfriend is an entirely different question. I don't expect him to pay for me unless he really insists. Maybe because I didn't date until I was in my mid 40s, I've never expected gifts of that sort. And I like to treat when I can, too. It's a matter of priority. For the sake of a partner, or a potential partner, I'd loosen my purse strings. But when the choice is my own solitary enjoyment vs savings, I tend to pick savings. It's not that I never splurge or treat myself. I'm not THAT disciplined! I just don't want to commit to yet another regular monthly expense if I don't have to.
Men who don't drive must have it even worse than women. When I googled trying to find advice about dating if you can't drive, all that came up were questions from guys, and the stigma they suffer was pretty clear. DUI is probably often the case for them. And for women, too, though it's not mine. I'd be the perfect designated driver except for the driving part!
The mechanical aspects of owning a car don't bother me a bit. Although I'm an academic, I'm fairly mechanically inclined. Even my mother, who has no mechanical skills whatsoever, has never been intimidated by that aspect of owning a car. She says that's what AAA is for! And i've lent a hand when situations have come up. For me, it's the handling of the vehicle, especially in traffic, where you have to be able to react without error and with lightning speed, judge where other cars are in relationship to your vehicle, and all those sorts of thing, that inspires terror.
And I really don't like cities. I love to visit them and appreciate the cultural life (and the public transportation!), but I grew up in a small New England town and would prefer to live in a less urban environment than I do now. Being cooped up in an apartment with a tiny balcony when you used to be able to roam acres is hard.
Somebody earlier mentioned my cash flow issue. I said I don't have money to spend on a smartphone or Uber. I have a perfectly fine, old-model Tracfone, which I seldom use because I have a phone number and international calling plan via a VOIP service, which allows people to reach me even when I travel out of the country. The only reason I need a smartphone is for Uber. When I looked into them a couple of years ago, the smartphone plans I saw were in the range of $75-100/month. That's probably what it would cost me to go somewhere that I want to go via Uber two or three times a month, which means that smartphone+Uber would cost me $150-300/month.
However, spending that kind of money to do things if I had a boyfriend is an entirely different question. I don't expect him to pay for me unless he really insists. Maybe because I didn't date until I was in my mid 40s, I've never expected gifts of that sort. And I like to treat when I can, too. It's a matter of priority. For the sake of a partner, or a potential partner, I'd loosen my purse strings. But when the choice is my own solitary enjoyment vs savings, I tend to pick savings. It's not that I never splurge or treat myself. I'm not THAT disciplined! I just don't want to commit to yet another regular monthly expense if I don't have to.
Men who don't drive must have it even worse than women. When I googled trying to find advice about dating if you can't drive, all that came up were questions from guys, and the stigma they suffer was pretty clear. DUI is probably often the case for them. And for women, too, though it's not mine. I'd be the perfect designated driver except for the driving part!
If you can't afford a smartphone how on Earth can you afford foreign travel living in the U.S.?
- move to a city with better public transportation. Nobody would even notice WHY you don't drive. If I understood correctly, you work but your job doesn't pay that well, so it shouldn't be that difficult to find a different one. Depending on how desperate you are in finding a man ...
- is there any other way of transportation you can use, like a motorized bicycle or scooter?
- learn to drive and get over your fears.
- Not do anything and keep everything the way it is. If you have a first date, I would just jokingly say "hey, btw, I don't drive because I have a phobia but on the up side - you'll never have to worry I'll take your car for a joy ride and crash it" or something the like.
If I would date you, I would find it more an issue that you don't have a smart phone than drive. Because it either means you are too poor to afford $40/month or you resist technology - both issues I would consider a red flag.
- move to a city with better public transportation. Nobody would even notice WHY you don't drive. If I understood correctly, you work but your job doesn't pay that well, so it shouldn't be that difficult to find a different one. Depending on how desperate you are in finding a man ...
- is there any other way of transportation you can use, like a motorized bicycle or scooter?
- learn to drive and get over your fears.
- Not do anything and keep everything the way it is. If you have a first date, I would just jokingly say "hey, btw, I don't drive because I have a phobia but on the up side - you'll never have to worry I'll take your car for a joy ride and crash it" or something the like.
If I would date you, I would find it more an issue that you don't have a smart phone than drive. Because it either means you are too poor to afford $40/month or you resist technology - both issues I would consider a red flag.
lol, is it that serious? I would date someone with a non-smart cellphone and my smartphone plan is a lot more than $40 a month.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar
lol, is it that serious? I would date someone with a non-smart cellphone and my smartphone plan is a lot more than $40 a month.
Agreed. I've dated women with flip phones. They could afford smartphones, they just don't like the idea of smart phones and the culture it brings. I'm not into technology though, so whatever.
lol, is it that serious? I would date someone with a non-smart cellphone and my smartphone plan is a lot more than $40 a month.
I manage my money well and I pay $30/month. If you can't afford that, you won't be able to go on vacations with me so ... no thanks.
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I just don't want to commit to yet another regular monthly expense if I don't have to.
