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So the "volleyball game" is actually soft-core porn.
The biggest issue is that he doesn't seem to acknowledge what concerns you.
Be honest. Do you nag him constantly? Are you relying on him to be your sole source of entertainment?
If so, you have unrealistic expectations.
If not, and he is hiding behaviors from you, you have a trust problem, which is very hard to overcome.
Yeah, apparently games like that are quite popular in Japan. I asked him before why he likes it and he just says it's more for the novelty of it.
I wouldn't say I nag him. I mean if I ask him to take out the trash, mow, etc. he does do it. And when we go on dates or out somewhere he does pay attention to me the only times he doesn't is when he plays his game and he gets in "the zone".
The volleyball pics do not phase me in the least. It is probably rated for "Family".
I can go down to the beach and see the same thing. Don't ever let him come to Hawaii or you will have to cover his eyes. Actually, you better not let him go to the beach at all, or pool, or lake......
He has to keep the same sleep hours as you? You require him to come to bed early with you for cuddling, but you don't want him to leave even if he's not tired?
Controlling much?
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The volleyball pics do not phase me in the least. It is probably rated for "Family".
I can go down to the beach and see the same thing. Don't ever let him come to Hawaii or you will have to cover his eyes. Actually, you better not let him go to the beach at all, or pool, or lake......
Um, it's not. It's rated M.
The hilarious part is that it's a really crap-rated game.
Man, now that **** is gonna show up in my browser.
OP, you need to figure out how unreasonable you are on your own because we have no context. I'd mostly be embarrassed that he has such bad taste in games.
Be careful in the assuming and placing your own predispositions on something you may have limited exposure and experience towards. it will fog your judgment and not serve Much good towards addressing the heart of the issues you have with your SO while still remaining respectful of their interests and personal needs.
The imbalance taking place here is the feeling of neglect. The op has to ask herself "honestly" why this bothers her and where it comes from because she admittedly has personal issues with not just the gaming, but the content and choices being made by her SO.
There is more than one single issue going on here and it's not just going one way.
The game time is the easiest thing in the world to compromise on together. Set dates, make routines and have specific times to spend together everyday. Allow your partner their personal space and don't blame them when they want time to pursue their own interests.
You're not the only one in the realtionship, compromise is going two ways. Remember this when addressing the issues of feeling neglected and remain respectful of your partner as an indivual.
You both have to get on the same page regarding time spent together. the rest of it is just personal fluff that you "just don't like" personally.
Last edited by rego00123; 05-12-2016 at 01:47 AM..
Op, seriously, this guy will NEVER win with you. He goes to bed with you when you want, cuddles, talks, and that isn't good enough, now he must be on the same sleep schedule as you and not leave the bed. What if he isn't tired? Seriously, it bothers you if you wake up and he isn't there? You don't find that a tad bit clingy? Do you have a life of your own, at all? If I were to guess I would say no. See your friends, find a hobby, get a life. I don't care if you don't get his games, he likes them, deal with it or leave him. Why are you even mentioning " if you have kids" You guys are incompatible, so you should end this and not even think about having kids. What are you going to bug this guy for the next 20 years about this and make him feel bad? Do as previously mentioned that another wife does, make him watch your shows every night, and only do things you want? Sounds like a great marriage....And for the record, my husband plays video games, I don't like them or get it, but it's not my place to stop him. And we do have kids, but he plays in his man cave and they don't see it. We rarely go to bed at the same time, because we work different work hours. He goes to bed later than me because he starts work later than me, and I certainly don't feel neglected or upset.
Well, I do usually go to bed before him and will ask him to come spend some time with me a little bit before bed watching TV with me or talking and cuddling which is very important for me and he does. But I think if we go to bed together we should both go to bed. Usually I sleep till morning but it bothers me if I wake up earlier and he's not there.
It may seem as if I am nit picking but I look to the future. What if we have children? I certainly wouldn't want my children looking at that kind of stuff, making my daughter think that's what grown women are like
He's great in all other ways but do men really need their 24/7 testosterone fix?
So you don't want him to enjoy his hobby playing a game, but you want him staring a a screen watching what you want to watch? Seriously leave him alone so he can find a better spouse. And that game has no nudity and nothing in it that cant be seen at the beach. Let him have his testosterone fix, do you really need your 24/7 cuddle estrogen fix?
I game from time to time, not as much as I use to but I still very much enjoy it when I have the time. Let the guy do his thing.
I understand why people game, sometimes regular life can get a bit boring and redundant so it's fun to escape into a fantasy land for a bit. Some of these games have great stories, great visuals, and offer a fun experience with gameplay and its fun to get immersed for a while.
First off, Dead or Alive is basically half Street Fighter, half Strip Fighter (please don't ask).
Second off, I don't even know if you should continue being in a relationship with this guy. You two are like vinegar and oil (I know it's oil and water, sue me); you obviously don't mix. Sounds like you need someone who will cater to your every desire and he needs someone who's a hardcore gamer like he is.
Just leave him be and catch yourself another fish.
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