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Old 05-13-2016, 03:19 PM
 
Location: Jupiter
10,216 posts, read 8,285,738 times
Reputation: 8628

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hotbloodedwoman View Post
Should and could are two different things. Women are natural helpmates. We are responders. While some women are a little more aggressive/ assertive, we still are women. We cannot negate our physiology. We want to be wanted, needed, and set apart. We are not set apart, if we are the ones that are in an unnatural position to hunt. Can we hunt? Yes, of course. Should we hunt? Only when necessary. Let a man be a man.
I wish some women would tone down on the aggressive behavior. Last thing I want to do is date a woman who comes off as manly.
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Old 05-13-2016, 03:19 PM
 
Location: The South
458 posts, read 328,180 times
Reputation: 389
Quote:
Originally Posted by JerZ View Post
Honest answer? I have known more men who liked to/wanted to pursue, than not.
That's because most men nowadays don't know what friggin' gender they are. lol Oh, sorry, was that rude? I think I am in rare form today. lol
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Old 05-13-2016, 03:22 PM
 
Location: The South
458 posts, read 328,180 times
Reputation: 389
Quote:
Originally Posted by 49ersfan27 View Post
I wish some women would tone down on the aggressive behavior. Last thing I want to do is date a woman who comes off as manly.
Thank you. When I was younger, I was so pro feminist. Now, I just really want to let my hair down and just be a vulnerable, romantic, smart, compatible, feminine ,sexual partner. That's all. Sigh.
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Old 05-13-2016, 03:26 PM
 
Location: Jupiter
10,216 posts, read 8,285,738 times
Reputation: 8628
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hotbloodedwoman View Post
Thank you. When I was younger, I was so pro feminist. Now, I just really want to let my hair down and just be a vulnerable, romantic, smart, compatible, feminine ,sexual partner. That's all. Sigh.
Aren't you married?
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Old 05-13-2016, 03:29 PM
 
Location: In the bee-loud glade
5,573 posts, read 3,334,079 times
Reputation: 12295
Quote:
Originally Posted by JerZ View Post
Honest answer? I have known more men who liked to/wanted to pursue, than not.

I have too. I would go so far as to say that while much of the expected roles for men and women are cultural, I think they start with some natural tendencies.


These threads don't make a difference, probably not even to the participants and so certainly not outside of these small confines, but they relate to larger issues. I think the more we talk about what is "natural" for men or women, the more we potentially pigeonhole people. Labeling something natural tends to help people see it as good and proper, which can be fallacious reasoning and in any case it's a nifty rhetorical device whether the OP intended that or not.


So if natural=good, and we ought to do good, then men ought to pursue and women ought to be pursued. People who don't follow those oughts are somehow deviant. That seems unnecessarily limiting to me. And before anyone claims he or she isn't influenced by the cultural static buzzing around us, just look at threads here. There are women who are assertive and bright and who'd die before they actually asked a man out.


So what if people were people? If a woman likes to be pursued and a man doesn't pursue her, he's not right for her. He's not a wimp or a loser any more than she is. They're just a mismatch. If either of them isn't getting what they want, they might try something different.
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Old 05-13-2016, 03:30 PM
 
Location: The South
458 posts, read 328,180 times
Reputation: 389
Quote:
Originally Posted by 49ersfan27 View Post
Aren't you married?
Short answer. I am.

Longer answer. However, since my dear husband is not slightly committed to working on the relationship, I consider the marriage null and void.
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Old 05-13-2016, 03:32 PM
 
8,781 posts, read 9,427,520 times
Reputation: 9548
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hotbloodedwoman View Post
Short answer. I am.

Longer answer. However, since my dear husband is not slightly committed to working on the relationship, I consider the marriage null and void.
Perhaps she is just "being himself" while you choose to look for things that you don't like about him as answers to the issues of what's really going on with your marriage
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Old 05-13-2016, 03:32 PM
 
Location: In the bee-loud glade
5,573 posts, read 3,334,079 times
Reputation: 12295
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hotbloodedwoman View Post
Thank you. When I was younger, I was so pro feminist. Now, I just really want to let my hair down and just be a vulnerable, romantic, smart, compatible, feminine ,sexual partner. That's all. Sigh.

I don't think any of that is incompatible with equal access to public services, equal employment and educational opportunities, reproductive rights, and a variety of other things feminism supports.
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Old 05-13-2016, 03:37 PM
 
Location: The South
458 posts, read 328,180 times
Reputation: 389
Quote:
Originally Posted by homina12 View Post
I don't think any of that is incompatible with equal access to public services, equal employment and educational opportunities, reproductive rights, and a variety of other things feminism supports.
Fair point.
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Old 05-13-2016, 03:39 PM
 
8,012 posts, read 8,186,123 times
Reputation: 12159
Quote:
Originally Posted by rego00123 View Post
Perhaps she is just "being himself" while you choose to look for things that you don't like about him as answers to the issues of what's really going on with your marriage
That's what I thought as well. Seems like a convenient excuse.
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