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Well assuming 84 is the year you were born you're my age......
So a lot more of the journey is in front of us to enjoy mate
You are correct, I was born in '84. I'm certain I'll learn more about myself along the way. Kinda like what I learned from going out on the date that my friends set me up on last week. I thought about it a little bit more, since I couldn't exactly put my finger on why I didn't want to see her again, but knew there wasn't going to be a second date. The answer ended up being that she had very loose boundaries as well. She used to use her urine to help friends pass drug test. She was definitely an over sharer on our date, which gave me a lot of information to base my conclusion off of to not want to see her again.
I don't think she was a bad person at all, or did anything maliciously, I just think she let too many people in her life that didn't need to be there. She would also do peoples homework for them in school and in college. It just kept adding up that her boundaries weren't set and where I'm at in my life, I couldn't imagine putting myself in that kind of situation.
It would be like a recovering addict going right back to the situations that aided in them becoming an addict.
My personal opinion, I think deep down he knew they weren't going to get back together seriously, and it was just too much to bare. There was some other issues going on as well with his drinking, but plenty of people have drinking problems and don't take their own life.
I just reflected on the fact that she lost her best friend and her son lost his father. About the only positive from this, is like she told me, she can make a clean break from the relationship now, even though it was made forcefully. I told her that I had to do the same thing when my first relationship and the love of my life ended. It took almost 2 years to even start getting over her and that only happened because she got engaged and then got married. It forced me to start processing that we'll never be together again.
This year has been rough for so many people and it makes me think my little problems are merely nothing.
You sound like a great guy, except for the part where you had an emotional affair with another woman with the knowledge that she's in a committed relationship, and then come across in your post like "woe is me because I didn't get the girl". While you're working on yourself, try to figure out why you were so willing to mess around with another man's wife and then make the breakup all about you. Should your future wife or girlfriend be unfaithful to you, you'd have a better understanding of what you did.
You sound like a great guy, except for the part where you had an emotional affair with another woman with the knowledge that she's in a committed relationship, and then come across in your post like "woe is me because I didn't get the girl". While you're working on yourself, try to figure out why you were so willing to mess around with another man's wife and then make the breakup all about you. Should your future wife or girlfriend be unfaithful to you, you'd have a better understanding of what you did.
They were never married. Just engaged for 4 years. I was involved, because they were on and off in their relationship. I can't lie, she filled me up with the things that I wanted to hear. When things were on with them, her and I didn't talk. When things were off, her and I talked a lot more. Hence why it was an on/off emotional affair. I got too wrapped up in it, because she would come back saying I'm leaving him or things are really rocky, but she never left.
I'm definitely not saying woe is me for her leading me on. It was more of I bought into something that never had the ability to come true. Hence why I did some true soul searching into why I continued to make that decision with her and allow her to treat me the way she did. In the end, she was only doing what I was allowing her to do.
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