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Ever since our parents passed away in a car accident like 6 years ago I've lived with my older sister who was 22 when it happened. She dropped out of college & everything just to take care of me and I'm not saying I don't appreciate it, but she keeps on bugging me about college all.the.time. and it's getting so annoying we really haven't had it easy since our parents passed, she's had to work 2 jobs to scrape money together for us to be living a somewhat decent life and ever since I turned 16 I got a job too.
We're really struggling financially, we can barely pay rent each month, she's saved up all the money our parents left us for my education and I keep.on. telling her to use it for us so we live more comfortably and without the stress of not having enough food in the fridge but she's all like "I want you to have dreams and become whoever you want to be in life" but I just think it's so selfish of me to go to college and use up ALL of the money our parents left us whilst my sister still struggles. Idk it just seems wrong.
We live in Manhattan, near Central Park, and I keep on telling her it's way too expensive and that we should move somewhere cheaper and struggle less but she says that this place reminds her of our parents and that she feels like she's leaving them if we move which in my opinion is bs and a lie, she just doesn't want to leave her sleazebag boyfriend, she's 28 years old and I'm 18, yet i'm the one who's the mature one, it's ridiculous. This is why I can't leave for college, it'll just worsen our situation. I don't know how I'm going to convince her that using the money to move out and start a new COMFORTABLE life is the better idea. I don't need college, I'll go later, what I need is a decent life for my sister and I, one where we aren't living just above the poverty line. I feel like she wants me to go to college so bad to 1) Get rid of me so she can screw her boyfriend without me bothering them and 2) To make ME fulfill the college experience she didn't get to complete.
Our parents left us a lot of money, instead of her wasting it on me and my education we have to spend it to live a better life. She should have used it ages ago.
So what should I do, I've tried talking to her and telling her I don't want to go, but she's just so hard-headed she won't listen.
Ever since our parents passed away in a car accident like 6 years ago I've lived with my older sister who was 22 when it happened. She dropped out of college & everything just to take care of me and I'm not saying I don't appreciate it, but she keeps on bugging me about college all.the.time. and it's getting so annoying we really haven't had it easy since our parents passed, she's had to work 2 jobs to scrape money together for us to be living a somewhat decent life and ever since I turned 16 I got a job too.
We're really struggling financially, we can barely pay rent each month, she's saved up all the money our parents left us for my education and I keep.on. telling her to use it for us so we live more comfortably and without the stress of not having enough food in the fridge but she's all like "I want you to have dreams and become whoever you want to be in life" but I just think it's so selfish of me to go to college and use up ALL of the money our parents left us whilst my sister still struggles. Idk it just seems wrong.
We live in Manhattan, near Central Park, and I keep on telling her it's way too expensive and that we should move somewhere cheaper and struggle less but she says that this place reminds her of our parents and that she feels like she's leaving them if we move which in my opinion is bs and a lie, she just doesn't want to leave her sleazebag boyfriend, she's 28 years old and I'm 18, yet i'm the one who's the mature one, it's ridiculous. This is why I can't leave for college, it'll just worsen our situation. I don't know how I'm going to convince her that using the money to move out and start a new COMFORTABLE life is the better idea. I don't need college, I'll go later, what I need is a decent life for my sister and I, one where we aren't living just above the poverty line. I feel like she wants me to go to college so bad to 1) Get rid of me so she can screw her boyfriend without me bothering them and 2) To make ME fulfill the college experience she didn't get to complete.
Our parents left us a lot of money, instead of her wasting it on me and my education we have to spend it to live a better life. She should have used it ages ago.
So what should I do, I've tried talking to her and telling her I don't want to go, but she's just so hard-headed she won't listen.
Well this thread will probably be moved, but I have a good bit of advise for you.
First a college degree does not equal success.
People have to be smart about what they are going to obtain a skill set in and how much they are willing to pay for it. Many colleges are big business now targeting the most vulnerable minds of society, young kids selling them the American dream.. I can go on and on about this but will say I know more people that are successful that have entered trades than those that did go to college struggling with student loans with limited job prospects.
I tell you where there is still good value is at community colleges and public in-state colleges where you get a better tuition rate. Tuition costs are adjusted for inflation about twice as much as they were 20-30 years ago and do not reflect what the market is paying in many circumstances.
So you're 18years old with no college debt. You can take advantage of that and be smart unlike many that aren't. In today's society, you can get a college education for literally the price of Library late fees but yet people are getting in to 60 grand of debt for a communications degree which is practically useless in the real world. One of my roommates who was from California was paying $24,000/yr out-of-state tuition to go to school at Penn State main campus to get a communications degree with average grades and a heart bent on partying is one first hand example. I doubt he's doing very well right now.
So you are struggling with money. What type of work can you do in the area to help yourself make a better income right now to help in that department? In the real world NETWORKING, not degrees gets you the job in most situations. Sure you have those low percentage, high applicant, high turnover corporate positions that require the Master's degree + Certifications. A very high risk for low reward IMO.
This is all coming from a guy that has two college degrees (Business and Nutrition Science) from a big ten University that is still struggling to make the investment worthwhile in his mid thirties. I have friends that are doing far better that never went to college to begin with but have started their own trade business. (one is construction, one is plumbing, and the other is organic farming.) All have their own homes and are supporting a family.
Vast amounts of resources are available at a VERY inexpensive price for those that are smart about it.
Last edited by Mikelee81; 06-11-2016 at 06:17 AM..
College degree does not guarantee success.... yes... However, choosing wisely and pursuing the right set of skills/education can (and often) open doors and lead to a path to a better life.
I have a lots of friends in my circle that never had an opportunity to go to college; many live very difficult lives. Not a single one would pass up an opportunity to go to college. Not a single one believes they are better off without it. I'm one of the few in my circle that got an education, graduated (average student), and moved on to a better life.
I simply wanted to be a mechanic. I hated school but I did well. My friends and my father all pushed me to try anyways because they all saw something in me that I didn't see myself. In retrospect, I'm fortunate to have such people in my corner. The last thing on my mind is that they were being annoying....
What are your career goals, OP? I assume you have some sort of job to help with expenses...is it something you can see turning into a profession? If not, you should think about getting some training to get on track for your future. It doesn't have to be college but you are going to need something.
So how much is your rent on that Central Park apartment anyway?
And why are you bothering your sister and her boyfriend when they are "screwing"? That seems a little weird.
This is a tough one. She's clearly fulfilling a role more than just being a sister, she's also being a parent. She feels that she knows what's best for you. You're both adults now though and you each have to make your own decisions about how you want to live your respective lives. Maybe time to split the money that your parents left you and then you can both decide what you want to do with your halves? You also don't have to live with each other any more, you're both grown ups.
What are your career goals, OP? I assume you have some sort of job to help with expenses...is it something you can see turning into a profession? If not, you should think about getting some training to get on track for your future. It doesn't have to be college but you are going to need something.
So how much is your rent on that Central Park apartment anyway?
And why are you bothering your sister and her boyfriend when they are "screwing"? That seems a little weird.
Rent in that place is WAY too high, and it's causing so many difficulties for my sister and I, I'm betting anything if we moved out of there to somewhere cheaper we would not be struggling as much as we are, but that place is where our parents lived and she doesn't want to let it go, even though I keep on telling her we can't afford it. Especially since she isn't using the will money.
I'm bothering her by being there and living in the same apartment as her, I'm sure she would want nothing more than to get rid of me.
Your parents didn't have a will? Money is not in a trust? That's strange.
Also strange that you say you live "near Central Park", as opposed to "the Upper East Side".
As I mentioned, when my parents passed I was 12, thus underage and my sister was 22 so obviously she was mostly in charge of the will money, not me. Well her and the lawyers. The problem is she isn't using the money because she says she's saving it up for me and for my education as well as living expenses. She wants to make sure I have the "best life possible" which is bs and stupid. I'm telling you if I were in charge of the money this would NOT be our life.
I hate the phrase "Upper East Side" that's what all the snobby rich people call it but you know what at least they can afford to live there, we can't. We should pack up our things and leave.
Um. The Upper East Side is the name of the neighborhood. It's not like the 20-somethings packed into Yorkville are rich or "snobby". The highest real estate is near the park. Again...strange vernacular for a New Yorker.
And your sister has managed to pay rent for a three bedroom near the park by cobbling together jobs? That's quite a feat.
Um. The Upper East Side is the name of the neighborhood. It's not like the 20-somethings packed into Yorkville are rich or "snobby". The highest real estate is near the park. Again...strange vernacular for a New Yorker.
And your sister has managed to pay rent for a three bedroom near the park by cobbling together jobs? That's quite a feat.
It is impressive and I'm proud of her for working so hard. Plus, I hate New York and frankly want nothing to do with it, I want to leave this place. I know what the neighborhood is called I just happen to hate "upper east side"
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