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I guess from what I have seen and not saying this about the OP is that women tend to want the trophy guy who they can brag about and show off (not to say that men don't so this as well) but at what time in your adult life do you really tell yourself that you're being too superficial and unrealistic in what you seek?
Chances are that these women who complain have had the nice guys but either they termed these guy boring, not attractive enough and put them in the friend zone or completely ignored these guys. This happens to many women these days. The good looking one put themselves on a higher pedestal and some have the attitude with them.
Look around you and see the girls who have the good looks, most of them have this entitled attitude that they deserve the best of the best (unrealistic expectations).
Women are more picky than me, they know that they have the advantage in the field so a lot of them play around to see if they can catch the rarest ticket in the ocean.
A lot tend to gravitate towards the bad boys and then you see those who then go back to the nice guy who they wouldn't consider. The bad boys to them display alpha attitudes
The other thing is where you're located. Around the Boston area, man you find the ones who think they are royalty material just by their looks only.
Attitude is also what will attract someone to you. If you are standoffish because you think every guy is trying to bang you, it will show in your bitchy resting face approach.
Talk to everyone, have a smile on your face. If you see someone who lets say is different (within reason talk to them) be approachable. turn your bitchy radar off and give the guy who looks shy or who knows is a foreigner a chance, you might be surprised.
You're only 25. My regret now as a 40 year old woman? That I worried about being alone as you currently do at your age, and the consequences that brought me. Now happily divorced.
I get pretty much the same sentence said to me every year ... "you're only 23", "you're only 24" .. I'm almost 26 and my romantic life is dead. I went from having tons of options to nothing due to my move to a smaller city. I don't regret it and I'm definitely planning on moving again soon enough, but I guess I will have to wait a bit more until I move to a bigger city. Then, this will probably revert back to "normal".
How will moving to a bigger city help? Sure there are more men to choose from but there will also be more dirt bags and losers. It's not the size of the city that's the problem.
How will moving to a bigger city help? Sure there are more men to choose from but there will also be more dirt bags and losers. It's not the size of the city that's the problem.
As long as the proportion of dirtbags/losers remains the same, having more partners on an absolute basis should be better. You have to figure out how to filter out the scum. Mod cut.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LostinPhilly
"You're only 25".
I get pretty much the same sentence said to me every year ... "you're only 23", "you're only 24" .. I'm almost 26 and my romantic life is dead. I went from having tons of options to nothing due to my move to a smaller city. I don't regret it and I'm definitely planning on moving again soon enough, but I guess I will have to wait a bit more until I move to a bigger city. Then, this will probably revert back to "normal".
Heh, I know decent looking guys with good jobs that were virgins at age 27. I know girls who are 24 who have never been in a serious relationship (or any relationship) for that matter ... partly because some guy they liked strung them along and then never really gave them 'time of day' - and they never moved on because they never found anyone else.
Last edited by PJSaturn; 06-15-2016 at 12:51 PM..
Reason: Rude and off-topic.
I get pretty much the same sentence said to me every year ... "you're only 23", "you're only 24" .. I'm almost 26 and my romantic life is dead. I went from having tons of options to nothing due to my move to a smaller city. I don't regret it and I'm definitely planning on moving again soon enough, but I guess I will have to wait a bit more until I move to a bigger city. Then, this will probably revert back to "normal".
I say that because I was in your shoes, but if you're feeling desperate and need to be with someone just because everyone is married, then go for it. Just hope you don't end up divorced like me years later.
I say that because I was in your shoes, but if you're feeling desperate and need to be with someone just because everyone is married, then go for it. Just hope you don't end up divorced like me years later.
No, I won't settle, which is the reason why I'm still single ..
As long as the proportion of dirtbags/losers remains the same, having more partners on an absolute basis should be better. You have to figure out how to filter out the scum. [snip]
Mod cut: Orphaned.
Her only issue is that she's not comfortable being alone and dateless as she makes a major life transition. Apparently she's used to getting a fair amount of attention from men, and is showing something like withdrawal symptoms, lol! To the OP: yes, you'll have to wait until you're done with this transitional phase, and move back to a bigger city. There's nothing wrong with that, and it doesn't mean you're behind schedule on someone else's yardstick of where you should be with your love life. Throw out the yardstick. Think of this as your incubation period as you get ready to spring a New You on the world. You have plenty of time to pull your personal life together and a whole life ahead of you.
Mod cut: Orphaned (reply to comments which have been deleted).
Oh and by the way, it is normal not to fully know what you want in a mate at 25. Heck, I know people who are 30 and still haven't figured it out. You have to do a lot of inner work to be able to fully recognize the qualities you seek in a mate. If you don't indulge in introspection, then you're bound to make the same mistakes again and again whether by entering relationships that are not beneficial to your highest good or by chosing the wrong partner. Instead of self-sabotaging my love life by choosing the wrong mates, I chose to heal myself first which I am sure will make me more confident and stronger, and as a result, will allow me to attract better suiter prospects.
Also, the reason why I do not know what I want in a partner yet, is because I am focused on healing myself and getting my career on track. Hence, I do not have the time to wander around dating websites or bars to date guys so I can figure out what I want. There's a time for everything.
I am in a small city which is the reason I probably don't get hit on often, because people here are fairly conservative and it's not like in big cities where you can meet men everywhere. It's not in their culture to come up to a random woman and chat with her. Here, socializing is fairly restricted to the few pubs and sporting events which is definitely not my scene. I chose to relocate here for work, but as I said, it's temporary.
When I posted this thread, I was feeling a bit down. I was going through a social of "withdrawal" episode (great choice of word), indeed. I suppose this time of my life is basically like the rehearsals before the big premiere.
[snip]
Last edited by PJSaturn; 06-15-2016 at 12:53 PM..
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