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Old 06-23-2016, 02:05 PM
 
4,828 posts, read 4,271,640 times
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I've been off and on my online dating profile over the years and I'm starting to see a bit of a trend with some of the women I've messaged. Women who have dated men can chime in about the men as well. In my experience, and my humble opinion, childless women who are pet owners are some of the most flakiest people I've ever been around. I say this only because they're the ones that are gungho about us hanging out and then the closer the date comes to us hanging out, they start to flake.


I can count on 4 different instances where this has happened to me over the last 2 years. They weren't just cat owners, because one of them was a dog owner. I can say that a lot of their social media activity was always about what ever cat or breed of dog they had.


Don't get me wrong, I love family pets, but keyword to me is they're more of a family animal. I like to be on the move too much to truly own and care for a pet by myself. By having a pet, it would cut too much into my mountain biking or being able to schedule things on a whim.


Women, can you elaborate if this is true with men you dated or attempted to date in the past? I'm not trying to encompass that all single people with pets are flaky, but this has become something that's rather frustrating. To boot, all the women I've encountered above all had, to me, super unhealthy relationships to their pets. Almost like you were competing with a pet to spend time with them. Kind of like a perfect weekend was laying on the couch all weekend with their cat(s) and/or dog(s).


I'm just curious if there's something I'm doing terribly wrong or has someone else experienced this as well.
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Old 06-23-2016, 02:12 PM
 
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Pets have replaced family and kids for many aging millennial women. This isn't a new concept as a quick google search will show.
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Old 06-23-2016, 02:14 PM
 
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As a formerly single woman who had a cat and two dogs at the time, I will say that, yes, my schedule did have to take my responsibilities to them into consideration. For example, I could not stay in the city for dinner and drinks after work, without first going home and taking care of them.

In terms of being "flaky"? I let guys know about this right off. If he didn't understand why I couldn't just meet for a drink after work, then oh well.

Since I've been with my partner, that we have between us 3 dogs, 2 cats and 2 llamas has really not hampered our ability to do things, or to schedule things "on a whim".

Apparently, women who have pets are not your "type". No harm in that.
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Old 06-23-2016, 02:34 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mishigas73 View Post
As a formerly single woman who had a cat and two dogs at the time, I will say that, yes, my schedule did have to take my responsibilities to them into consideration. For example, I could not stay in the city for dinner and drinks after work, without first going home and taking care of them.

In terms of being "flaky"? I let guys know about this right off. If he didn't understand why I couldn't just meet for a drink after work, then oh well.

Since I've been with my partner, that we have between us 3 dogs, 2 cats and 2 llamas has really not hampered our ability to do things, or to schedule things "on a whim".

Apparently, women who have pets are not your "type". No harm in that.

It's not that they aren't my type, it's that they're the ones who schedule a day to hang out and then flake. When I look back at past events, the ones that flaked the most tended to be childless women with pets. I've been in relationships with women who had pets and it worked. We had issues completely unrelated to the pets. I'm just asking an opinion to see if other people are or have experienced this, or do I need to change my approach up.
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Old 06-23-2016, 02:35 PM
 
6,304 posts, read 8,992,430 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by weezerfan84 View Post
It's not that they aren't my type, it's that they're the ones who schedule a day to hang out and then flake.
I think it may be the type of person, not whether or not they have an animal. Like, if it wasn't this used as an excuse, it would be something else?
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Old 06-23-2016, 02:37 PM
 
4,828 posts, read 4,271,640 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mishigas73 View Post
I think it may be the type of person, not whether or not they have an animal. Like, if it wasn't this used as an excuse, it would be something else?

Not necessarily. We all have some type of excuse. Just asking a question.
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Old 06-23-2016, 02:41 PM
 
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Good rule of thumb:

The "Pets? No Problem!" Zone.

1 Pet. No sweat. In fact, great. I love animals, too.

2 Pets. Sure. Because one keeps the other company, right?


Yellow Flag. Proceed With Caution.

3 Pets, any combination. Um. Okay. Pets are a lot of work. Out in the yard, okay. And if they're constantly underfoot, they're gunning for you, especially at the top of a staircase.

Pets that constantly growl, bite, and generally hate you. If she isn't correcting Fido when he growls at you, imagine what would happen if you have kids together.

3 Pets, any combination and constantly patters about them as if they were toddlers. Hmmmm. Substitute child syndrome at work.

Constant baby talk to pets as if they understand her. All they really understand is 'food,' 'treat,' 'outside,' 'lay down in your bed,' and 'ride.' The rest of the time, she's really talking to herself as if she's a doddering old man feeding squirrels in the public park.

Multiple pets, all of whose names end with a 'Y' sound. Quite possibly an eight-year-old in a woman's body.

Don't Even Think About It.

4 Pets +. Unless she's living on a farm, now she is constantly refereeing the pets from killing one another. Running the pets to the vet. Taking them out on walks. Feeding them. Pet dander is everywhere, the cat is peeing in out-of-the-way places, and her place always has this weird funk about it. You will never watch a movie at her place without umpteen interruptions. Even if you manage to spend the night, you'll be sharing the bed with her AND the labrador retriever. You know, the one with flatulence issues.

Multiple pets with portraits of her pets on her walls. One is cool. Fifteen? No, seriously? On the refrigerator? Excellent. Over the fireplace? Hmmmm.

Multiple pets with articles of clothing such as sweaters. You know they have fur, right? Not tethered to reality.

Cross-stitched samplers or bumper stickers with sayings such as "The More People I Meet The More I Like My Dog." Okay, this translates to "I have the people skills of a turnip and am a terrible judge of character." After all, get dogs in a pack and let them roam the neighborhood, and they're going to kill something. They think that's fun. Avoid.

Urn with Fido's ashes on the mantel. Turn around and get back into the car. It's your only hope.

Last edited by cpg35223; 06-23-2016 at 03:56 PM..
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Old 06-23-2016, 02:41 PM
 
Location: SoCal again
20,705 posts, read 19,880,600 times
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Most of my friends including me have pets and no kids. We are not flaky. Far from it.


But on our free time we try to incorporate our dogs as much as we can. So I rather have you over and hang out with you and my dog as compared to letting my dog sit alone at home and hang out at your place. I cannot mountainbike on week day evenings because I am with my dog in the evening.


Women with children are usually more flakey IMO. They are always late because of the child not getting ready in time, or sick or whatever or cancel or have something going on with their child. People with children are always stressed out, in a hurry, never on time and constantly cancel - my experience.
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Old 06-23-2016, 02:46 PM
 
6,304 posts, read 8,992,430 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by weezerfan84 View Post
Not necessarily. We all have some type of excuse. Just asking a question.
And I'm answering it.

No, I don't think that people with pets are generally "more anything" than others.
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Old 06-23-2016, 02:47 PM
 
6,304 posts, read 8,992,430 times
Reputation: 8149
Quote:
Originally Posted by cpg35223 View Post
Good rule of thumb:
Or not.
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