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There's a term for it but it escapes me. It's like when a body builder looks in the mirror and sees himself as small but the rest of the world sees him as huge. Or a model seeing herself as fat, but in reality is perfectly fit.
For the passive aggressive person who continuously direct rep messages me, I see a fair share of both sexes believing they "deserve" the best partner period.
Reality is, you don't deserve anything, male or female.
There's a term for it but it escapes me. It's like when a body builder looks in the mirror and sees himself as small but the rest of the world sees him as huge. Or a model seeing herself as fat, but in reality is perfectly fit.
Yes, body dysmorphic disorder.
But this is even more complicated.
I do think a lot of it has to do with the OP being gay. I once read that even the Dewey Decimal System can't compartmentalize love and sex the way gay men can.
Gay dating is notoriously shallow, and the OP seems to have fallen right into it, even though he apparently hasn't even been in a relationship yet.
There is so much drama and indecision and insecurity tied to dating and what stage you are at in the process and what you each want. It makes it very hard to reconcile self-image, sexual desire AND emotional attachment.
OP, I really think that if you spent some time, maybe even with a pro, working on yourself and your self-image/self-worth, you would better understand what mistakes you're making and also become a more attractive person overall.
Yeah right. You forget I'm Asian (knock 4 points off the scale, and 4inches) <lol Ok im just joking. I'm actually pretty gifted as an Asian guy in that department
Yeah right. You forget I'm Asian (knock 4 points off the scale, and 4inches) <lol Ok im just joking. I'm actually pretty gifted as an Asian guy in that department
I grew up in a dysfunctional home where I was the plain child compared to my beautiful sister. When you grow up thinking you are unattractive you have a tendency to latch on to the first guy that shows you attention. Hence my disaster of a first marriage at 18. Thankfully we didn't have any children.
As the years went by I began to realize that I was very pretty but those insecurities stuck around. Interestingly enough someone I went to school with stopped by my office one day about 7 years ago and we started talking, realized we both went to the same school and the next time she came in she brought our yearbook. I hadn't seen it since I graduated in 1972. In looking through the pictures I was shocked! Rather than seeing a plain Jane type of girl I was looking at a picture of one of the most beautiful girls in the graduating class. It was me. I was finally able to see what I had never been told growing up. Sometimes we really don't look at ourselves the way others do, whether that be in a good way or not.
When I was younger I looked good. Now I'm older I still look decent but age has sapped my youthful looks and skin.
Hear! Hear! I'm a month from 70 and you'd best believe my looks have changed. But I consider my many wrinkles to be character lines and after spending a significant portion of my life outdoors (raised at the beach for starters) I've earned every one of them. My wife considers me ruggedly good looking (her term) and that's really all that matters. As for the rest, I don't scare small children nor repel other women. I'm content!
Yeah right. You forget I'm Asian (knock 4 points off the scale, and 4inches) <lol Ok im just joking. I'm actually pretty gifted as an Asian guy in that department
I don't think I'm unattractive, but I don't have big boobs or a big butt so there's nothing for a man to drool over when he looks at me. I don't usually wear clothing that shows a lot of skin.
Lol I think there are a lot of guys who prefer thin, tight bodies..
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