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This is going to be long so if you don't have the stomach for it, please don't go any further.
I'm 46. My wife is almost 34. We have two children 2 1/2 and 15 months. I've been unhappy for a long time. My wife is just innately not a person I like as a partner.
She is a great mother. I would give her a 9.5 out of 10 as a mother. But as a person/partner for me I would give her a 3. I'm not saying she is a bad person, she doesn't abuse me, cheat( as far as I know) on me, etc. she just possesses qualities in her that are deal breakers for me.
We've been together for 13 years married for almost 10. Why did I marry her? I admit my fault. I thought she was young and she would change. I take full responsibility for me marrying her.
We don't fight much maybe 1-2 month but when we do fight, for me, it's like ww3. She's just not the person for me and some of her character, I totally despise. I think we I stayed for so long because like I said, we don't fight much but when we do, I see characteristics in her that is a complete deal breaker for me.
I've tried to leave her before but she would not accept it and say I'm just mad.
I'm weak I'm the sense that if she doesn't let me go, I don't go cause I don't want to hurt her really.
A few months ago, she did something that was the final straw for me. I told her I was done with but I would stay for the sake of the kids. My boys are my life. Since then, we've fought a few times. The last time, I didn't like seeing my boys frightened face when we fight so I told her I'm leaving. She said if I wanted to be a coward and not try to work it out, then fine, leave but then I'll have to tell everyone. Again, I'm weak. Today, we had it out again and this time I told her to pack up and go live with her parents with the boys. I would never take the boys away from their mother. She said if I want to leave, then I should pack up. I did. I just hate seeing my frightened boys face when we fight.
I'm thinking they are really young now. I was willing to sacrifice my own happiness for their sake but now thinking about it, another almost 18 years of this?
I'm thinking they are so young, it wouldn't affect them at all if I did it now.
I will always be in my boys life no matter what. I will always support them.
Not enough info, but generally - yes - you are weak and selfish.
We don't really know what's your problem with your wife... I think, your wife has a much bigger problem with YOU.
This is going to be long so if you don't have the stomach for it, please don't go any further.
I'm 46. My wife is almost 34. We have two children 2 1/2 and 15 months. I've been unhappy for a long time. My wife is just innately not a person I like as a partner.
She is a great mother. I would give her a 9.5 out of 10 as a mother. But as a person/partner for me I would give her a 3. I'm not saying she is a bad person, she doesn't abuse me, cheat( as far as I know) on me, etc. she just possesses qualities in her that are deal breakers for me.
We've been together for 13 years married for almost 10. Why did I marry her? I admit my fault. I thought she was young and she would change. I take full responsibility for me marrying her.
We don't fight much maybe 1-2 month but when we do fight, for me, it's like ww3. She's just not the person for me and some of her character, I totally despise. I think we I stayed for so long because like I said, we don't fight much but when we do, I see characteristics in her that is a complete deal breaker for me.
I've tried to leave her before but she would not accept it and say I'm just mad.
I'm weak I'm the sense that if she doesn't let me go, I don't go cause I don't want to hurt her really.
A few months ago, she did something that was the final straw for me. I told her I was done with but I would stay for the sake of the kids. My boys are my life. Since then, we've fought a few times. The last time, I didn't like seeing my boys frightened face when we fight so I told her I'm leaving. She said if I wanted to be a coward and not try to work it out, then fine, leave but then I'll have to tell everyone. Again, I'm weak. Today, we had it out again and this time I told her to pack up and go live with her parents with the boys. I would never take the boys away from their mother. She said if I want to leave, then I should pack up. I did. I just hate seeing my frightened boys face when we fight.
I'm thinking they are really young now. I was willing to sacrifice my own happiness for their sake but now thinking about it, another almost 18 years of this?
I'm thinking they are so young, it wouldn't affect them at all if I did it now.
I will always be in my boys life no matter what. I will always support them.
Am I being selfish to want to leave?
Please be as blunt as you want.
Fighting in front of the kids? That's the worst. WTH?
Leave. Seek therapy. Hopefully she will too. You two will have a long, painful row to hoe with co-parenting, so prepare yourself for that.
This is going to be long so if you don't have the stomach for it, please don't go any further.
I'm 46. My wife is almost 34. We have two children 2 1/2 and 15 months. I've been unhappy for a long time. My wife is just innately not a person I like as a partner.
She is a great mother. I would give her a 9.5 out of 10 as a mother. But as a person/partner for me I would give her a 3. I'm not saying she is a bad person, she doesn't abuse me, cheat( as far as I know) on me, etc. she just possesses qualities in her that are deal breakers for me.
We've been together for 13 years married for almost 10. Why did I marry her? I admit my fault. I thought she was young and she would change. I take full responsibility for me marrying her.
We don't fight much maybe 1-2 month but when we do fight, for me, it's like ww3. She's just not the person for me and some of her character, I totally despise. I think we I stayed for so long because like I said, we don't fight much but when we do, I see characteristics in her that is a complete deal breaker for me.
I've tried to leave her before but she would not accept it and say I'm just mad.
I'm weak I'm the sense that if she doesn't let me go, I don't go cause I don't want to hurt her really.
A few months ago, she did something that was the final straw for me. I told her I was done with but I would stay for the sake of the kids. My boys are my life. Since then, we've fought a few times. The last time, I didn't like seeing my boys frightened face when we fight so I told her I'm leaving. She said if I wanted to be a coward and not try to work it out, then fine, leave but then I'll have to tell everyone. Again, I'm weak. Today, we had it out again and this time I told her to pack up and go live with her parents with the boys. I would never take the boys away from their mother. She said if I want to leave, then I should pack up. I did. I just hate seeing my frightened boys face when we fight.
I'm thinking they are really young now. I was willing to sacrifice my own happiness for their sake but now thinking about it, another almost 18 years of this?
I'm thinking they are so young, it wouldn't affect them at all if I did it now.
I will always be in my boys life no matter what. I will always support them.
Am I being selfish to want to leave?
Please be as blunt as you want.
Yeah you beat me to it I was going to ask the kids reactions.... Yes that's the key mate... It's a magical and wonderful notion to want to stay together for the kids sake but if you're fighting, arguing and ultimately scaring the kids then THATS IT!
I'm sorry mate you have to get out, It certainly doesn't sound like you've got much chance of a reconcile between the 2 of you either?
What did she say when you told her that your upset about scaring the kids?
Not enough info, but generally - yes - you are weak and selfish.
We don't really know what's your problem with your wife... I think, your wife has a much bigger problem with YOU.
The final straw for me was that we were out with a bunch of friends. All was going great or so I thought until she beat up a girl that was actually in our group because she thought we have something going on. Physically assaulted the girl.
And the answer is no. I have nothing going on with this girl. I don't even know her last name. I don't have her phone number. Nothing. I have never talked to the girl except for casual talk when she is with our( well actually her group cause all of these people I met through her) group. The only time I even talked to,the girl that night was when I and 2 other guys went out for a smoke and she came out with us.
The final straw for me was that we were out with a bunch of friends. All was going great or so I thought until she beat up a girl that was actually in our group because she thought we have something going on. Physically assaulted the girl.
I see. There is a problem. But how come that you and two other guys let your wife beat up that girl? Were you just standing and watching for entertainment purposes?
Are you having a history of cheating, wandering eye or some secrets?
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