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Really, I know this is pathetic. But I'm a single momma with one wonderful son, a full time grad student, I work at least 20 hr.s a week usually, more if I can. I have no time to date. But I'm very lonely and finally emotionally ready to date again.
This part of your post really sticks out to me. Am I right in assuming that maybe its just the physical intimate part of dating that you miss? I think you are really just "physically" ready to date again. I would suggest that you wait until after your studies to pursue an "emotional" relationship. Its impossible to cultivate an "emotional" relationship while going to school full time, raising a child and working. But its pretty easy to have a "physical" relationship while doing those things.
Since you dont have any time to "date", maybe you do have time to "socialize" with other students/people in study hall, local starbucks while studying, bookstore, etc. When I have free time, I love to just take the Mac and spend an hour or so at Starbucks, Borders or Barnes and Noble. There are lots of other people there who are all social so we get to know each other pretty well. Maybe you can do this in your area.
I had a feeling you were good looking if a little kinky in the bedroom.
good looking?To some yes to some no that's the way it goes.
kinky?...told 'ya the education question depends on what kind of education you're talkin' 'bout.
said it before and I'll say it again though, my kiss will melt you ladies,soft exploring teasing kisses with some attention to the ears and holding back at moments so you come to me with hands doing some exploring also.
after that romance time is over and time to getting dirty......real dirty.And I like dirty talk,kind that gets you banned off CD.
Big people with low self esteem refer to themselves as "not as thin as I used to be" or "I guess I do have a few extra pounds". Skinny people with low self esteem refer to themselves as "gaudy", "lanky", or "manly".
Big people with high self esteem will introduce themselves as "curvy", "beautiful", or "voluptuous". Skinny people with high self esteem will refer to themselves as "svelt", "beautiful", or "dainty".
See the difference? Its all about perspective and perspective begins at you.
The first, thats called being honest with the other person about yourself. if you have a few extra pounds, then it is what it is. And the second, I don't know of anyone who is looking for a mate that would refer to themselves as "svelt, dainty"...beautiful, possibly. But that in itself would be a big turn off!
That doesn't sound like someone with high esteem, that sounds like someone who is full of themself and conceited.
Wow, you guys all had some very good things to say. Several of you pointed out that I'm pretty down on myself in my post. That's interesting to me because I really didn't think I was so much anymore, but maybe I've got farther to go than I immagined.
I think of being ready for a relationship--not just a body relationship. Actually, I just can't have only the body relationship. I've never been able to do that.
I divorced my husband of seven years just before the new year, but I haven't seen him in three years and haven't spoken to him in one, and little before that. I was very down when I left him and I've worked very hard and come a very long way since then.
But one thing that's not gone well is my weight. I was much slimmer when I left him. I had a two year old and had lost more than I'd gained with pregnancy. But we lived in an different country and I had a better diet, and used to walk everywhere. Here the diet and car culture have, well, grown on me. Heh. I really don't feel comfortable like this.
I know three hours a week sounds like very little, but trust me, I'm exhausted.
Which is why it's also kind of crazy to think of a relationship now, but I miss having an adult male to talk to! And yes, finally, I miss the body relationship, too, but I didn't for a long, long time. Male companionship is just something that I feel, and feel strongly these days, is missing in my life. And even if I wait until grad school is over, I'll still be a full time momma and a full time teacher.
And I'm posting this to get responses like the ones you've provided because I don't really have anyone else to talk to about this, and because I can be some mystery girl and not have to embarrass myself!
because I can be some mystery girl and not have to embarrass myself!
He-he, not if you become addicted to the rest of the forums! This site allows only one registration. That's why I'm kinda careful what I say on certain forums.
On the topic, if that's what you really want, I wish it for you! Just don't concentrate on it too much. It seems to be true that the more you want something the more you push it away. There's also something to be said about being careful what you wish for...
I don't know what ASL means, but I seem to remember reading a post by you that your only requirement was that a girl have a pulse, so I'm not sure what to make of this .
The first, thats called being honest with the other person about yourself. if you have a few extra pounds, then it is what it is. And the second, I don't know of anyone who is looking for a mate that would refer to themselves as "svelt, dainty"...beautiful, possibly. But that in itself would be a big turn off!
That doesn't sound like someone with high esteem, that sounds like someone who is full of themself and conceited.
Perhaps I am full of myself and conceited then because I have no issues calling myself dainty for my 120lb, 5'2 frame. You may have a few "extra pounds" (compared to when? high school? when you were born? yesterday?) but those pounds don't have to come off as if they are a burden. I put on a "few extra pounds" in the winter because I need the body fat to not feel like I'm about to freeze all the time and while I may not be able to fit into my skinny jeans, I have no issues flaunting the extra curvature just the same.
Is that conceited? Perhaps. But at least I'm happy
Wow, you guys all had some very good things to say. Several of you pointed out that I'm pretty down on myself in my post. That's interesting to me because I really didn't think I was so much anymore, but maybe I've got farther to go than I immagined.
I think of being ready for a relationship--not just a body relationship. Actually, I just can't have only the body relationship. I've never been able to do that.
I divorced my husband of seven years just before the new year, but I haven't seen him in three years and haven't spoken to him in one, and little before that. I was very down when I left him and I've worked very hard and come a very long way since then.
But one thing that's not gone well is my weight. I was much slimmer when I left him. I had a two year old and had lost more than I'd gained with pregnancy. But we lived in an different country and I had a better diet, and used to walk everywhere. Here the diet and car culture have, well, grown on me. Heh. I really don't feel comfortable like this.
I know three hours a week sounds like very little, but trust me, I'm exhausted.
Which is why it's also kind of crazy to think of a relationship now, but I miss having an adult male to talk to! And yes, finally, I miss the body relationship, too, but I didn't for a long, long time. Male companionship is just something that I feel, and feel strongly these days, is missing in my life. And even if I wait until grad school is over, I'll still be a full time momma and a full time teacher.
And I'm posting this to get responses like the ones you've provided because I don't really have anyone else to talk to about this, and because I can be some mystery girl and not have to embarrass myself!
Well honey we are here if you need us (and even when you don't need us, if you post here, there will always be people like me to weigh in ). If you want to work on yourself weight-wise to feel better, then you've got to invest the time and effort--no matter what. If you don't have time to exercise then do strength training when you watch TV. Do crunches during all the commercials. Get rid of your couch and replace it with an elliptical machine. Who knows, maybe even go vegetarian for a while to bring down the calories if you don't have time to burn them off with exercise.
The results are what you put into them. That pretty much applies to anything---weight, relationships, jobs, etc. If you put yourself out there (beyond the internet) and start doing things you love, your passion will put a glow about you and attract people to you. Soon enough, you shall find your prince charming. Stay strong
If you want to work on yourself weight-wise to feel better, then you've got to invest the time and effort--no matter what. If you don't have time to exercise then do strength training when you watch TV. Do crunches during all the commercials. Get rid of your couch and replace it with an elliptical machine. Who knows, maybe even go vegetarian for a while to bring down the calories if you don't have time to burn them off with exercise.
The results are what you put into them. That pretty much applies to anything---weight, relationships, jobs, etc. If you put yourself out there (beyond the internet) and start doing things you love, your passion will put a glow about you and attract people to you. Soon enough, you shall find your prince charming. Stay strong
I know all of this is true! I don't watch t.v.--no time! Trully, I never watch t.v. That's the kind of thing that I'm saying. I don't have down time to cut into! If ever possible, I take a nap at lunch so that I'm not to tired to drive to pick my son up at three!
I always pay my bills late, even when the money's in the bank on time, because I don't have time to sit down and just do it. There are always 10 other pots on the stove starting to boil over!
I really know I should just keep waiting. I'm only one person and I guess that means that I just can't meet all my own needs and all the needs of my son at the same time. And I won't even get started on my house! I used to say that I could never have a maid, but boy, if I had the money I could sure do it now!
You post is good and your advice is spot on, but I just can't do it. No time at the moment to do anything I love just for doing it. And I don't have family support because I barely have family, so no easy sitter even if I were to get a date.
Agh, well, now it just sounds like I'm whinning or *itching, and I don't want do that. My life's my life, and it's not really bad now. Just a little lonlieness.
Put your son to work with helping out with chores around the house!! That could free up at least a few minuites, right??
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This site allows only one registration. That's why I'm kinda careful what I say on certain forums.
Just don't concentrate on it too much. It seems to be true that the more you want something the more you push it away. There's also something to be said about being careful what you wish for...
