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Tell me about it. It is normal and healthy for spouses to have different interests. It is also normal for spouses to spend time in coed groups that share those interests. Most of the time, a person doesn't want to date a person who is a mirror image of him/herself for a reason. There is no way to learn/grow in a relationship if a person has the exact same interests as you. That person is fun as a person with whom to share an interest, but not as a life partner.
I think it's absolutely fine you spend your Fridays apart doing things that interest you. That shouldn't have to change because a woman joined, just as long as the pattern stays the same. If the pattern changes so that he wants to spend more and more time with the other woman, then that's when it becomes an issue.
...how wrong is it for me to worry that this girl may be cooler than me? Worrying that maybe he will end up spending more time with her because they have more interests.
Hate to sit at home every friday night thinking about how awesome she probably is.
What should I do? What should I say? How should I really feel?
I'd be more worried if he can never think of anything nice to say about women. Does he really need to pretend half the population doesn't exist? Saying someone is interesting or they draw zombies is hardly romantic or sexual, so yeah I wouldn't worry. Don't go with unless he really really wants you to.
I love my husband very much, been together for 5 years now and he is my best friend. I like to think that I trust him, I thought I did but he told me something today that made my stomach sink a bit. Really feel like I am overreacting here but I can't drop this feeling.
My husband has been playing dungeons and dragons and I don't really have any interest in it. I am a gamer myself but I would rather play on PC or console. He told me recently how there is a new girl in the group and she likes to draw zombies and what not. My husband plays games with this group every friday. The thing is, how wrong is it for me to worry that this girl may be cooler than me? Worrying that maybe he will end up spending more time with her because they have more interests.
I already felt a push in the beginning of the relationship that he would like me to get in to board games more. Should I join the dungeons and dragons group too? I am very shy and I don't see the fun in playing a game that involves that much live interaction and thinking. The group he plays with consists mostly of single men with borderline Aspergers. Hate to sit at home every friday night thinking about how awesome she probably is.
What should I do? What should I say? How should I really feel?
Find a board game you like and ask him if he will play it with you, and/or the group. I know people play that D&D and sometimes they try to get me to join their Meetups but I'm not really into it either. There's entire lists and reviews on www.boardgamegeek.com
A lot of the newer board games are considered cooperative not competitive, and involve problem solving, and teamwork. So they make great party ideas. There's actually a zombie one called Dead of Winter they sell it it at some bookstores. I bet she's never played that so you'll be cooler than her easily, she doesn't have a chance lol.
This girl is playing D&D on a Friday night and you're worried she's cooler than you..?
I had the same thought, but obviously OP wasn't referring to the common definition of "cool." She meant that the other woman might seem appealing to her husband because they have similar interests. In any case, OP may not be back -- but if she is, I'd like to point out that since her husband volunteered information about the other woman, she probably has nothing to worry about.
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