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True. The OP did seem to be really rushing the "dating" to push it into a relationship. This, before even getting to know the guy. Also repeat: texting does not constitute "getting to know the guy". It's only getting to know the side of him that he wants you to get to know. Or worse: getting to know a false self he's projecting in order to get with you.
This is very true. Texting is wholly inadequate. In fact, I'll go one further and say that texting (As opposed to IMing) as your way to know someone is complete foolishness.
For there is simply no substitute for a face-to-face conversation to know if the guy is for real or not. And if you don't trust the guy enough to meet him for coffee or in another public place, then why are you giving him your number?
Pouting and demanding sex is the mark of a true gentleman, don't you know?
And then he should stand from his pulpit admonishing a woman on what she SHOULD do...or else she's just a "stupid woman" meme, ha ha. Dummy woman! Falling for idiocy just like every single woman does! Ha ha! Stooopids.
If these are the nice guys, there is no hope for us ladies, LOL.
Luckily, those of us who know a jerk in good guy's clothing (hint: he'll manipulate a woman by telling her other guys who manipulate her are the bad guys...but he isn't...because...because...um...oh, time for a giant speech and the runaround) when we see one aren't easily manipulated in this way. Sadly, the women who will fall for this sort of dominance, anger, judgment and run-around are already insecure and will only become more so once they fall for the "I'm the best you'll get, I'm a good guy, it gets worse from here and then you'll wind up oooooooooooold and alone, noooooooooobody will ever want you again" horror.
I hear you about the let downs. At this point i rather have a kickass mancave to come home to with some good food and tv and a dog to lay on my lap to keep me company. I'll probably die alone like in the godfather movie with only my dog next to me.
If they claim the ex is "Bi Polar", get your BP radar on immediately!!This means the actual first date is likely the BP one.
Sorry for the interruption ....back to the scheduled gloom and doom.
I think any "the ex is a nightmare because of X, Y, Z" stuff is a red flag. I mean there are legitimate gripes, sure. We all have them and we're all probably right at least some of the time (and our exes have their gripes against us). But if he's so wrapped up that he talks about the ex even while making out...well, he's just a mess, then. I don't want to sound cliche but you did dodge a bullet in that regard, OP. People only talk a little about what they're thinking about, which means as much as comments a bout the ex dominated YOUR night, he was thinking much much more than that...that whole entire evening, even while kissing you.
I think any "the ex is a nightmare because of X, Y, Z" stuff is a red flag. I mean there are legitimate gripes, sure. We all have them and we're all probably right at least some of the time (and our exes have their gripes against us). But if he's so wrapped up that he talks about the ex even while making out...well, he's just a mess, then. I don't want to sound cliche but you did dodge a bullet in that regard, OP. People only talk a little about what they're thinking about, which means as much as comments a bout the ex dominated YOUR night, he was thinking much much more than that...that whole entire evening, even while kissing you.
Eew.
This. Unloading about the ex on a first date? Indicates complete cluelessness about what is good form, and what isn't. Or willful disregard of same. Absence of social skills, presence of self-absorption.
Pouting and demanding sex is the mark of a true gentleman, don't you know?
In my recent experience with OLD, getting mad and calling names is the mark of a truly sexy gentleman. If you tell someone you don't want to meet them, he then gets mad at you, calls you names and then asks why you won't meet them even though you have already told them you were not interested in hook ups and that is all that they want.
Some people are mental. It is amazing what an awful person I am simply because I don't want to go over some random (and boring) man's house to bang.
Really nothing for me to say except I'm a 51 year old male and have been having to deal with a society that appears to only want to date and mingle through dating websites and texting and I gave up 5 years ago.
So if your 29 and getting tired of how dating works these days, try doing it until your 51. Every time I've joined a dating website 8 out of 10 responses are from professional webcam models just looking to make a dime.
If I had known back then that dating would turn to electronic devices, I would have married that girl 30 years ago.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,935,179 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blazin65
Really nothing for me to say except I'm a 51 male and have been having to deal with a society that appears to only want to date and mingle through dating websites and texting and I gave up 5 years ago.
So if your 29 and getting tired of how dating works these days, try doing it until your 51.
If I had known back then that dating would turn to electronic devices, I would have married that girl 30 years ago.
My mistake.
You should have invested in the technology 30 years ago!
I'm 6 years younger than you (45), what is wrong with using the websites and texting?
Wouldn't it be nice if the internet and texting capabilities of all countries went down for 12 months? You would likely see a 50% increase in marriage licenses. People would actually speak and go out rather than sit in their house or car staring at their phone.
Wouldn't it be nice if the internet and texting capabilities of all countries went down for 12 months? You would likely see a 50% increase in marriage licenses. People would actually speak and go out rather than sit in their house or car staring at their phone.
They'd still be at home playing video games or staring at their TV. Or hanging out with their friends wondering where all the women are.
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