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Haven't read the thread, but just stopped by to say that if I were embarrassed to use online dating, I would not have met my husband. I thought the stigma was long dead, though it appears to be alive and well here on C-D. Consider the source.
Haven't read the thread, but just stopped by to say that if I were embarrassed to use online dating, I would not have met my husband. I thought the stigma was long dead, though it appears to be alive and well here on C-D. Consider the source.
I thought it was long gone, too, particularly for people under the age of 55 or 60, but even for older folks as well. I'd say 1/3 to 1/2 of the people I've known who have gotten married in the last 5-10 years met online-- educated, attractive, well-liked people who have no qualms about sharing how they met when asked. This thread has been an eye-opener for me to see that the stigma is still out there in some corners.
Haven't read the thread, but just stopped by to say that if I were embarrassed to use online dating, I would not have met my husband. I thought the stigma was long dead, though it appears to be alive and well here on C-D. Consider the source.
I've never understood the stigma to begin with. To me, OLD or anything similar of the sort, is just another way of meeting people that you'd have never met. And for some, OLD is better than IRL.
I've never understood the stigma to begin with. To me, OLD or anything similar of the sort, is just another way of meeting people that you'd have never met. And for some, OLD is better than IRL.
I actually ran into the reverse stigma: there were a few people I met when I first moved here last year who thought it was kind of odd that I was a single 30-year-old dude who had no interest in OLD. Not sure if that's an age group thing or what.
As far as its usefulness, it's just like any other way of meeting people. Some people come across well in that format and like it, while others are better able to put their best foot forward IRL. Horses for courses, as they say.
I actually ran into the reverse stigma: there were a few people I met when I first moved here last year who thought it was kind of odd that I was a single 30-year-old dude who had no interest in OLD. Not sure if that's an age group thing or what.
I wouldn't call it a stigma, but it is certainly unusual these days for a single guy in his 30's to have not tried at least ONE of the dating sites or apps at some point-- particularly if you live in or near a city. I wouldn't negatively judge someone for that (who would? why?!?), but I would find it curious.
OP, no...it is a good thing. But if your a gal be prepared for lots of sex crap from bozos coming your way. Who knows, you may like the attention ?
BTW, how did you make out OP...been dating or more?
I talked to few men but I never met up with anyone. I just recently started dating an old friend from middle school so I shut down my OLD profile for now. I really don't have time to date more than one man at a time so I'm going to see how things work out with the new guy.
Anyway, I only had my profile up for a few weeks and I got tons of messages and some seemed like decent men with potential so I'm open to trying it again.
I wouldn't call it a stigma, but it is certainly unusual these days for a single guy in his 30's to have not tried at least ONE of the dating sites or apps at some point-- particularly if you live in or near a city. I wouldn't negatively judge someone for that (who would? why?!?), but I would find it curious.
Yeah, stigma isn't quite the right word - I was mainly just repeating back the terminology that was used in the post I quoted. What I mean to say is that there was definitely a peer pressure component of some of those conversations. Not in an overbearing or aggressive way, but more in the "why aren't you on Tinder? You should really do that!" kind of way.
So if that's the reaction young people in a mid-sized city have to OLD today, I think it's safe to say that there's generally not a stigma attached to meeting a partner through one of the sites or apps in that demographic now.
If you actually were surprised to be on dates with mentally ill women, one with 'very bad' symptoms of schizophrenia (are there any good symptoms?) then you are strongly lacking in your vetting process...
"very bad" not defined in the terms of it being good or bad, but being defined on how frequent and severe her symptoms were.
Also should I be expecting when I take a lady out to dinner on a first date to a nice restaurant that she's going to be breaking down crying talking about her ex cop boyfriend her harshly dumped her?
Not sure exactly what I'd do different in the "vetting" process. It would have been nice to know these things prior to the first date, but that wasn't the case.
If you're suggesting that there are slim pickings online than I agree with you completely. That was the point of my post.
I think it's very strange how you talk about online dating as though it's something very shameful and horrible. You really are the one criticizing other peoples' choices here. I'm sure nobody who does O.L.D. wants to hear anyone else talk about how horrible it is, how they'd rather die than use it, etc. etc. KWIM? It just sounds overly dramatic and immature, anyway.
I also find it VERY strange that people who think online dating is creepy, also use internet sites like this to talk to people they've never met before in person. If you have a great "in real life" social life, go out and pursue it now.
In fairness, the poster said "he" would rather die than meet someone using online dating site/app. He didn't criticize other people for using it. It seems to have struck a chord with you...... It is probably the "creepy" stigma that online dating has always had, to a degree, that really bothers you.
I KNOW THIS IS AN OLD OLD POST I"M RESPONDING TO, LOL.....One of the groups I'm in had a virtual happy hour this past Friday, and this exact topic came up, so I did a search on C-D and landed on this thread
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