Lying about being engaged??? (wife, married, woman, love)
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Ok guys and gals, I have posted about my ex relationship a while back and I was given great advice, which I took and I was doing well. Recently my ex came to my house and it was a total shock. This person told me how they miss me, loved me, etc. I was against her even laying a finger on me due to being engaged and making my life hell. Anyways long story short she told me she lied to me about being engaged. In her mind she wanted to end it between us because she thought I would be happier away from her and because she thought the feelings of love would go away. My feelings never fully left and I started to have many memories with her. Fast forward the following day- She called me and we started to have a 2 hour conversation that ended after I asked her if she has had sex with anyone. Her reply was no, no man ever touched me. The question was asked in return and I was honest. Prior to telling her the truth I warned her this was not the right time to speak about this matter. I also told her to promise she will handle my answer as an adult and understand we were broken up due to her. My answer was yes, 2 times with different girls(in a 3 month time frame, keep in mind). When she heard this, She instantly burst into tears saying that she understood but the she was in so much pain. Minutes later she asked if she could get off the phone because she couldn't take the pain anymore. I told her I understand and that I'm sorry for what had happened. Now we started emailing each other and that's when things got crazy.....
Me:
You said you wouldn't be upset so hold your word, I told you because you insisted and I did not fudging enjoy it because my heart is with you and no other woman but you constantly abandoning me. I have feelings, I have a god damn heart that you keep on crushing. You don't even want to see me and don't know how you feel towards me. I keep telling you that I want you but you keep ignoring me and if you feel the need to get even when you have left me then it's over. We will take the test and get through things if you love me but if you don't then you can leave me alone permanently. You have been my world but I havn't been yours. I am not trying to deceive you no longer, I don't want you to lie anymore to me. I love you and I want nothing more than to be with you and share my life. You cannot treat me like doung and go mia and tell me to go sleep with others when you are engage. You lied to me in the most hurtful way.
Her:
I rather jump off a roof Or let you watch me fudged by another so you can feel my pain And I'm
convinced your love is phony
Me:MY LOVE IS NOT, HOW DARE YOU. I fudging go through hell and back despite how terrible you have treated me without giving up on you despite me not trusting you I have always been here to comfort you, to hold you.
Her:
You're fudging pissing me off you piece of narcissistic doung. IT IS NOT THE SAME. AND I'LL BE DAMNED IF YOU GET TO TOUCH ME AGAIN WITHOUT ANOTHER MAN Touching ME FIRST
Me:
Alright look at how you are disrespecting me, be hurtful, do whatever you want steph. As I said FUDGE ME, IM TRASH AND A PIECE OF DOUNG. I KNOW I AM BECAUSE THIS IS HOW I HAVE BEEN TREATED SO I MUST BE STRAIGHT GARBAGE. YOU SAID YOU WERE ENGAGED AND IGNORED ME FOR MONTHS ALL FOR A LIE????
Her:
So you can imagine someone touching my breasts and pleasing me also? You want to know what my feelings are? That's it. I hate your guts! I have been looking for someone to have a family with and you have always wanted kitty.
Me:
I WANTED YOU BUT YOU NEVER WANTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111 I fudging communicated with you and you constantly ignored me.....
Anyways it got more intense and now what is your take on the situation? Should she be angry at me for having sex when she has ignored me for months, told me she was engaged and not to ever contact her.
She's lonely and wants to feel better by making you feel worse.
That's all.
EDIT: for further clarification.
Deal with it by not involving yourself in the insanity any further. She will attempt to keep roping you back in with extreme behavior, but stick to the course and she will eventually start to understand that she doesn't hold any influence over you anymore.
At that point her whole reason for constantly bothering you in this way will cease to exsist and so will her drive to keep up the theatrics with you.
TLDR: Kill the reason for behaving like uncontrolled monkey and the monkey will find you too boring to bother with.
She has to stop speaking out of pure emotion in an attempt to manipulate the situation to her benefit and address where the failing was on both ends to understand one another...if that's her true intent.
As it is, the more you buy the more she is going to attempt to keep selling you.
Last edited by rego00123; 12-19-2016 at 04:35 PM..
Yikes! Way too much drama...run far, far away. And to answer your question, no, she doesn't have any right to be p***** at you, since she left YOU and supposedly got engaged.
Goodness...she's a manipulative liar and kind of narcissistic and definitely immature. She broke up with YOU, and is mad because you had sex with someone else? According to her, it's all your fault she feels bad. Nope, she brought that on herself.
Run. Run far, far, far away. Her manipulative blaming won't get better.
This woman who claimed to be engaged to another is also your wife - is that correct?
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She's lonely and wants to feel better by making you feel worse.
That's all.
EDIT: for further clarification.
Deal with it by not involving yourself in the insanity any further. She will attempt to keep roping you back in with extreme behavior, but stick to the course and she will eventually start to understand that she doesn't hold any influence over you anymore.
At that point her whole reason for constantly bothering you in this way will cease to exsist and so will her drive to keep up the theatrics with you.
TLDR: Kill the reason for behaving like uncontrolled monkey and the monkey will find you too boring to bother with.
She has to stop speaking out of pure emotion in an attempt to manipulate the situation to her benefit and address where the failing was on both ends to understand one another...if that's her true intent.
As it is, the more you buy the more she is going to attempt to keep selling you.
Thank you for the advice and yeah, I would have ignored her but she actually came to my apt. Bro I felt almost like crying, cause I still have feelings for her.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gretchen963
Yikes! Way too much drama...run far, far away. And to answer your question, no, she doesn't have any right to be p***** at you, since she left YOU and supposedly got engaged.
This is what I told her clearly in the emails. I'm glad I'm not alone on this, thank you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JerZ
Are you kidding me?
Don't even talk to this person.
And the fact that all she can do is bring the conversation/raging argument back to you hypothetically watching her get poinked is just plain weird.
Nope I wish it was a joke, I won't, I ignored the last 5 messages she sent me. However what to do if she waits for me infront of my apt again?
Quote:
Originally Posted by rrah
Goodness...she's a manipulative liar and kind of narcissistic and definitely immature. She broke up with YOU, and is mad because you had sex with someone else? According to her, it's all your fault she feels bad. Nope, she brought that on herself.
Run. Run far, far, far away. Her manipulative blaming won't get better.
Man I know, it's freaking sad. I told her that she had no regard for my feelings and she wants to further hurt me by sleeping around and rubbing it in my face. I went through hell and having sex with 2 nice people who actually had conversation with me was therapeutic in a sense.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mikala43
This woman who claimed to be engaged to another is also your wife - is that correct?
Yes, you have a great memory! This is another reason why this is hard for me.
She is a drama queen to the millionth degree - she creates it and then blames you.
You married crazy - you better hurry up and divorce that crazy.
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She is a drama queen to the millionth degree - she creates it and then blames you.
You married crazy - you better hurry up and divorce that crazy.
Yeah tell me about it smh You made me crack a smile lol in order to properly divorce we need to both be present at the mushaf.
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