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If it's "light enough" that it's not a worry people are not going to care regardless.
That issue is totally moot
if you "suffer" seriously in ways that can be debilitating or concerning...as you have said people will notice and question or remove themselves entirely
The issue here is how to tell someone your concerns and how to do it in a way that doesn't immediately turn someone away.
They answer is, you can't.
Express your concerns to them, but don't expect it to change anyone who hasn't already decided they want nothing to do with it (and by extension, you)
From other threads/posts from this op, he seems to be more easily subject to being more trusting than others might be.
Rather than being as much concerned about how a new lady friend might view him, it may be more important that he needs to evaluate them.
I don't think that you really need to tell them when you first meet them. Why? Because it's really none of their business, especially when they barely know you.
There's certain things that I don't really discuss early on, myself.
Thanks. I actually read that before. I have had four girlfriends in my life over the last few years. But only told the last one, were as the rest found out that something was wrong the hard way, I think. But one thing that site does not go into, is when to tell her. There is actually a girl I really like right now, that I started seeing, but don't want to tell her too early, but at the same time, do not want to wait till it's too late.
We have a date to watch a movie, and she picked Rain Man to watch since it's one of her favs... Now if there is any time that autism is going to come up in a conversation or debate, it's going to be after watching this movie, so I was wondering.... But I only just met her a couple of weeks ago. So maybe I shouldn't...?
NOTHING IS "WRONG".
You are you, that's all. Most autistic people go through life never knowing that they are autistic, and in truth, it doesn't matter.
You are obviously high functioning autistic, so I would not "bring it up" at all. Why should you? It's not a communicable disease. Knowing that you have been diagnosed changes nothing but your understanding of yourself.
My family laughs at my attention span antics, but it has never slowed me down. Your autism should not slow you down.
I am a 71 year old retired salesman.
"Her panties are definitely on the floor..definitely! Gota go to K-Mart!"
Do that to make her laugh and then tell her you have a condition that is similar but not the same.
Tell her you may not be able to tell her how many match sticks she drops but you are a bit awkward in some situations.
I'm sure she will ask more questions but it is a door slowly opening. You could even omit 'Autism' for the time being so to don't hit her in the face with the door.
Like if you were vegan. You could begin with saying you eat mostly salads and it may lead into... Are you a vegan. It's much better then, "Oh my gosh this place serves only meat. Gross!
Okay thanks. Am I suppose to say this after taking off her panties though?
I wouldn't wait until after you've slept with someone. I think that's being deceitful. I would tell someone you're dating very early on and let her decide if it's something she's okay with. If she's not okay with it than she's not the right woman for you anyway.
I don't think there's an easy way to say it so you just have to say it and see how she responds. I'd do it by the second or third date before either one of you gets too attached. Just be honest, it's part of who you are and you don't have to be ashamed of it. We're all different, that's what makes us interesting.
Okay thanks. I am actually very uncomfortable telling a woman this until after I have slept with her. The reason being is that in past experiences, I find that women are more responding after, the courtship has been sexually consummated.
After sleeping with a woman, she just wants me more I find. They text me more often, and talk more, can't wait for the next date, where as prior to sex, they were less emotionally available, etc.
That is why I think a woman will likely be more open to it, after sleeping with her.
You are you, that's all. Most autistic people go through life never knowing that they are autistic, and in truth, it doesn't matter.
You are obviously high functioning autistic, so I would not "bring it up" at all. Why should you? It's not a communicable disease. Knowing that you have been diagnosed changes nothing but your understanding of yourself.
My family laughs at my attention span antics, but it has never slowed me down. Your autism should not slow you down.
I am a 71 year old retired salesman.
Nice post!
It's true! It's not like herpes. It's not contagious.
I think a person with OCD would be worse. I told a person when visiting their home that it was very neat and clean and their response was, "It's a disease!"
I think the OP should follow your advice.
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