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* Its ok to pursue passionate interests and desires.. but to what end? What other opportunities in life did she miss out or pass up on because of that pursuit?
* She wants a guy to take care of her? That is not feminism. I don't believe she quite understands what it means to be a feminist.
* She won't date other actors and performers because they don't make enough money? But it is enough for herself? Hypocritical stance.
* When I date a woman, I want my equal in life... not a dependent. I prefer self sufficient women.
I personally would pass up on her.... Let her pursue her acting / performing desires to the ends of the earth without dragging me along. She wants her cake and eat it too... Another actor/performer with the same desires is probably best person for her but she is won't accept the financial sacrifice associated with the starving actor's lifestyle. The other alternative to her is a wealthier guy who doesn't care about taking on a live in girlfriend as a dependent.
If you fall into either of those categories.. go right ahead.
Not for me...
Sounds like her 'acting' career is coming along quite nicely.
I was dating this 30 year old aspiring actress/performer of shows and musicals with dreams to make it to broadway. But she basically just has one part time job at a museum that could lead to a lower paying full time job, and works at whole foods part time with the occasional low budget show performance. I see no real career in her future and what makes it worse is she is a self-proclaimed feminist who wants a guy to take care of her and won't date another actor/performer because they don't make enough. Which kind of goes against feminism. What are you guys thoughts on dating a girl like this? Would you do it long term?
It's only her mentality/attitude that would put me off nothing else
Why was you with her if you didn't approve of her?
It's only her mentality/attitude that would put me off nothing else
Why was you with her if you didn't approve of her?
Well it was supposed to be a temporary thing. I was in that city for 8 months and she just got out of a relationship and didn't want anything serious. Of course, she became attached and wanted more. The sex was good and I would be gone soon with no real commitment to her, so I didn't care that much. I could have moved back to be with her or tried to keep it going if I wanted, but didn't because of a few reasons.
Well it was supposed to be a temporary thing. I was in that city for 8 months and she just got out of a relationship and didn't want anything serious. Of course, she became attached and wanted more. The sex was good and I would be gone soon with no real commitment to her, so I didn't care that much. I could have moved back to be with her or tried to keep it going if I wanted, but didn't because of a few reasons.
Yes that's the main reason why my and many I'd guess FWB relationships have fizzled out from one of us getting attached and yes it happens
I'm sure I could guess the reasons why you don't want to pursue mate but agreed on the whole I believe you made the right choice if there was this over hanging above
I was dating this 30 year old aspiring actress/performer of shows and musicals with dreams to make it to broadway. But she basically just has one part time job at a museum that could lead to a lower paying full time job, and works at whole foods part time with the occasional low budget show performance. I see no real career in her future and what makes it worse is she is a self-proclaimed feminist who wants a guy to take care of her and won't date another actor/performer because they don't make enough. Which kind of goes against feminism. What are you guys thoughts on dating a girl like this? Would you do it long term?
I encourage you to read up on divorce laws.
It all boils down to this: Status Quo.
If you willingly support a money grubbing "feminist" who feels you are required to support her and treat her like the princess she is, the courts will require you to do that post divorce.
She doesn't keep your balls in a silk lined purse in her nightstand next to her rabbit, does she?
She's an etiltled succubus. Keep hitting that as a "side girl" if you want but move on when you find a quality human being.
I was dating this 30 year old aspiring actress/performer of shows and musicals with dreams to make it to broadway. But she basically just has one part time job at a museum that could lead to a lower paying full time job, and works at whole foods part time with the occasional low budget show performance. I see no real career in her future and what makes it worse is she is a self-proclaimed feminist who wants a guy to take care of her and won't date another actor/performer because they don't make enough. Which kind of goes against feminism. What are you guys thoughts on dating a girl like this? Would you do it long term?
I don't think the question is about whether to date a girl w/o a career. The question is: should you date THIS girl, if you're looking for LTR material. She's not it. And I bet what you've seen of her attitudes and expectations (demands) is only the tip of the iceberg. Move on while you can. (Do NOT get her pregnant!)
Last edited by Ruth4Truth; 02-07-2017 at 01:26 PM..
I was once married to a passive dependent. Never again! Later I married a true feminist who was self-supporting, well employed and with her own pension plan. What a delightful difference. It wasn't the money. It was one's dependency vs. the other's delightful independence. Attitude and drive count for a lot.
Hmmm. It depends. I'm a female BTW who works in the performing arts/education. My job is relatively low paying but I also don't expect a man to care for me and there are higher paying jobs in my field which I can (and am) working towards. She doesn't really sound like a feminist. Some of the other posters are correct that gigging is very common in the performing arts. I think more problematic is her attitude of expectation to be taken care of.
You think financials are tough right now, its going to be several times more difficult when you bring children into the picture. Will she set her aspiration aside to support the children? or does she expect you to support the children, rear the children, and supplement her performing arts lifestyle at the same time. That could get pretty darn old pretty darn quick.... She's 30 now... not 20s...
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but agreed on the whole I believe you made the right choice if there was this over hanging above 
