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From what I understand you to have said, I think you may have to realise that your parents beliefs are that in the eyes of THEIR God you are doomed to Hell because you are living with another man. There is no coming back from this position as far as they are concerned, so I think you will have to live with it. They know him as a man since you both were kids. Nothing you can do now will make any difference so I should just get on and enjoy your life without them. I dont know how they would treat your partner if you were to continue your relationship anyway.
Think about it, they are now faced with the situation of their much-loved son not going to Heaven where they are going AND going to Hell as well. They have lost you for the rest of their life and the next.
It should be a growth situation where they can examine their beliefs and find out that love and acceptance should win over man's religion every time, but I do not hold out much hope as it is a hard lesson to learn. Maybe I have read the situation wrongly. If so, I am sorry, but I do not see any good outcome by trying to force the issue on them. Good luck.
Well if my partner isn't biologically male and doesn't identify as a male then how is that a sin to my parents?
My partner doesn't have this they just were born with a chromosomal abnormality either they are xxy like they were diagnosed. Or like 23andme implied they are xx but born with male genitalia. Either situation would be intersex technically.
Yes, as noted:
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Originally Posted by TabulaRasa
Intersex... can also present with chromosomes that do not match the genitalia and vice versa, gonads that do not match external genitalia, etc.
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Imo xx male syndrome is definitely intersex while klinefelter syndrome is more like a gray area. Not so much you know.
Klinefelter Syndrome, while a chromosomal anomaly, is not ordinarily considered intersex.
Well if my partner isn't biologically male and doesn't identify as a male then how is that a sin to my parents?
What your parents consider against their spiritual convictions is a pretty grey area for anybody to speculate upon, no? It doesn't really have anything to do with your partner's biology, it's wholly centered around their personal preceptions of what they understand about sexuality.
I would hope that if disclosure of your partners medical information, even if your partner is on board with it, is likely to make your parents behave cruelly v. supportively, you would just not opt to inform them, as they don't really need to know.
Do you have to refer to her as "them" or "they"? I don't get it. If you were trying to explain it to me and kept referring to "them" I'd be even more confused and probably a little irritated.
Do you have to refer to her as "them" or "they"? I don't get it. If you were trying to explain it to me and kept referring to "them" I'd be even more confused and probably a little irritated.
Pronouns are generally chosen at the preference of the person being referred to, in such circumstances.
Do you have to refer to her as "them" or "they"? I don't get it. If you were trying to explain it to me and kept referring to "them" I'd be even more confused and probably a little irritated.
Agreed. IMO as a parent, I think the parents would want to know which pronoun to use as well, if they are expected to engage in the conversation...
OP should have an idea of which pronoun their partner prefers and use it, if the goal is to explain anything to the parents and anticipate their accepting 'the partner'.
Are you trying to say your parents don't approve because, to them, you are dating a person they believe to be another male and they disapprove of homosexual relationships.
So what you think might make it better is for you to 'educate' them about this condition so they might be able to think of 'him' as a 'her'?
But if they are really genetically female XX karyotype. Then how is it wrong that they decided to use female hormones to homophobes? I mean they are a genetic female with a female appearance. On the biological sense they are clearly not biologically male. The way they were reared clearly is just a mistake.
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Originally Posted by old_cold
Are you trying to say your parents don't approve because, to them, you are dating a person they believe to be another male and they disapprove of homosexual relationships.
So what you think might make it better is for you to 'educate' them about this condition so they might be able to think of 'him' as a 'her'?
If I'm understanding this correctly, the person in question recently found out that they really are female. Unfortunately, IMO, the parents will still not accept the relationship, because it's too much of a gray area. The OP's parents are already familiar with this person's past, and despite what "science" might say, will probably always believe that this person is really male; homophobes are not known for their reasoning skills. But, again, that's just my opinion.
The OP's parents are already familiar with this person's past, and despite what "science" might say, will probably always believe that this person is really male; homophobes are not known for their reasoning skills. But, again, that's just my opinion.
Unfortunately for the happy couple, I tend to agree with you.
You get that Klinefelter's Syndrome (and intersex) are actual biological anomalies, and not an issue of trend or opinion, right?
Neither has anything to do with "the younger generation, " they're medical/chromosomal conditions.
OP, as long as your partner is on board with it, use your best judgment. Only you know your family, and can say if their being in the loop would be a positive. If your partner isn't on board with it, no way.
I do get it. But at your prompting I read more about the condition, so thank you.
Essentially, the parents won't be satisfied with this partner because of their longstanding prejudice against them. The OP can simply tell his folks that his lover is a genetic female, and follow his heart.
As with coming out, some families feel angry and betrayed while others are more supportive. The OP can only do what's right for him.
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