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OP thinking to do this thread was a brilliant idea.
I'm really impressed you've only received constructive criticism too.
Yes! Brilliant...or crazy! I'd be at my desk waiting for someone to come up to me and say: 'what're you doing, I saw that selfie you just posted on CD, we have a meeting in 10 minutes".
Quote:
Originally Posted by Londoncowboy30
Ha what a subtle way to go fishing! LMAO!!
PS I've got a " bathroom selfie " on here myself and hasn't hurt lol
Yeah but you're in the bathtub with a strategically placed rubber ducky, it's easy to tell who's your type! 😸😻
Yes! Brilliant...or crazy! I'd be at my desk waiting for someone to come up to me and say: 'what're you doing, I saw that selfie you just posted on CD, we have a meeting in 10 minutes".
Yeah but you're in the bathtub with a strategically placed rubber ducky, it's easy to tell who's your type!
Hahahaha yes my bath is definitely big enough for two!
I think people just want similar to what they are... or should @ least expect that.
Not to offend anyone, but if you're not that attractive and you're overweight, you probably shouldn't look to try and date supermodels.
I am average looking, with average intelligence, I have a college degree and I am a professional in the corporate sector. When it comes to finding a man, I seek men with in a similar position.
If I was unemployed, I would not expect to go out with a CEO.
I think you have to know what your boundaries are.
This is all very interesting. Thank you for humoring me. As a bit of background, I realize this may have come off as self-indulgent, but that wasn't my intent. Actually, I struggle with confidence - like a lot. My husband chose booze over bed so frequently that I had decided it was me -- I wasn't attractive. Since he died, I've lost 20 lbs and have really been working on my confidence. I hate to reduce people to "numbers" but for comparison - this time last year I thought myself a 4 or 5. Now I feel closer to a 7 or maybe an 8. With the weight loss and dressing better, I thought I'd be hit on left and right. When that wasn't happening, I hypothesized that maybe I'm coming across as stuck-up or ultra-selective. Based on these responses, it sounds like that's not the case. I'm going to go with "I don't smile enough" or "I'm not putting myself in situations where men would approach anyone".
This is all very interesting. Thank you for humoring me. As a bit of background, I realize this may have come off as self-indulgent, but that wasn't my intent. Actually, I struggle with confidence - like a lot. My husband chose booze over bed so frequently that I had decided it was me -- I wasn't attractive. Since he died, I've lost 20 lbs and have really been working on my confidence. I hate to reduce people to "numbers" but for comparison - this time last year I thought myself a 4 or 5. Now I feel closer to a 7 or maybe an 8. With the weight loss and dressing better, I thought I'd be hit on left and right. When that wasn't happening, I hypothesized that maybe I'm coming across as stuck-up or ultra-selective. Based on these responses, it sounds like that's not the case. I'm going to go with "I don't smile enough" or "I'm not putting myself in situations where men would approach anyone".
It's definitely NOT your looks
That's fine love you've worked on yourself and your getting to where you want to be so congratulations with that , yes just by being more outgoing, receptive and aware ( of blokes that might be interested/checking you out ) and I'm sure things will come together .
Ps my " going fishing ( for compliments ) comment was purely in jest
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,957,550 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JJ09990
This is all very interesting. Thank you for humoring me. As a bit of background, I realize this may have come off as self-indulgent, but that wasn't my intent. Actually, I struggle with confidence - like a lot. My husband chose booze over bed so frequently that I had decided it was me -- I wasn't attractive. Since he died, I've lost 20 lbs and have really been working on my confidence. I hate to reduce people to "numbers" but for comparison - this time last year I thought myself a 4 or 5. Now I feel closer to a 7 or maybe an 8. With the weight loss and dressing better, I thought I'd be hit on left and right. When that wasn't happening, I hypothesized that maybe I'm coming across as stuck-up or ultra-selective. Based on these responses, it sounds like that's not the case. I'm going to go with "I don't smile enough" or "I'm not putting myself in situations where men would approach anyone".
Sorry to hear that, but you may want to talk to someone about this mindset. It was most likely he was an alcoholic so it wasn't like it was you or alcohol and he chose alcohol.
You do understand OP, that men don't care what your "type" is. If they like what they see, they will try. It's not until later in a relationship that a man cares about your feelings, likes, and dislikes. Nobody is going to look at you and decide not to try to pick you up because you look like you would prefer an accountant with a Buick that has brown hair and a mustache.
All that guy in the bar is evaluating is whether or not he would like to get into your pants. That's it.
Sorry to hear that, but you may want to talk to someone about this mindset. It was most likely he was an alcoholic so it wasn't like it was you or alcohol and he chose alcohol.
I have. It's been a year. And he was definitely an alcoholic, pill abuser, etc. All of which he kept hidden until we were married. I loved him, and he had a few great runs of sobriety but always a relapse. The grief has been tough because of all the resentment for everything he put me through but kept hidden from the world. His job thought he was so amazing because of his morning uppers. They got the best of him. They didn't see the mess that came home everyday.
Why would someone walk up to you at a Starbucks unless they're working there to serve you?
People drinking coffee is hardly something fascinating that people rarely have in common.
Maybe being a guy you don't get the same amount of attention that some of us women do. I've been cold approached at work, the mall, the beach, the market, the post office. Why would someone do that you ask?
Perhaps they find you attractive? Maybe they're very self confident? Maybe they figure it's worth taking a shot?
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LMAO!! 
, yes just by being more outgoing, receptive and aware ( of blokes that might be interested/checking you out 
