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The way you wrote it ... came across as bragging about the fact that you embarrassed her.
Seems like she embarrassed herself. But, Rick wanted to take "credit" for it.
As to the thread topic,
Count me in as agreeing with the smart replies along the lines of:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life
Treat "them" as individuals rather than a conglomerate.
After all, you wouldn't want them to brush you off at your age as "single for a reason," would you?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Londoncowboy30
Well with ^^^^ mindset your buggered either way mate as you really do need to look at a person as the individual that they are
On the assumption a single mother is looking for a relationship with you then my very best advice is you HAVE to be ALL in and above board especially as there's kid involved and be prepared to pay the kid just as much attention as the mother ( I'm sure you wouldn't meet the kid straight away but it IS an eventuality and will happen at some point if you're dating long enough )
...
In short just be sure it's what YOU want before you proceed so she doesn't get mucked about mate
The most important realization for me was knowing that I will never be the center focus in her life... hat has already been reserved for her children. Gotta accept that beforehand.
Sorry, gotta disagree.
I've known some single moms who were game players. I've seen them play guys for suckers - one tried to play me a few years ago...I embarrassed her right in front of her kids, for her stupid games!
OP,
As a single dad, my advice to you is to not date single mothers that are willing to introduce you to their children quickly. I have a rule on not personally introducing any women to my kids for 6 months. Young kids can develop attachments quickly.
Parents that are willing to introduce their children to strangers too quickly are not putting their kids first. They will put themselves before you every time. No thank you.
The poster that I quoted is an embarrassment. It's really sick that he/she derives pleasure from potentially harming children.
As a single dad, my advice to you is to not date single mothers that are willing to introduce you to their children quickly. I have a rule on not personally introducing any women to my kids for 6 months. Young kids can develop attachments quickly.
Parents that are willing to introduce their children to strangers too quickly are not putting their kids first. They will put themselves before you every time. No thank you.
The poster that I quoted is an embarrassment. It's really sick that he/she derives pleasure from potentially harming children.
I say it's more of an embarrassment to lie and fabricate stories. And exploit your kids to your childish games, only to get caught in your games. Sorry, but I'm one to speak my mind - if something isn't right, I address it immediately. Hold back, and people will walk on you; I'd sooner hold my ground. No pushover am I.
If you find a good one that you enjoy being around and that has minimal baggage than by all means go for it.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I have been saying this for a while now. I wish I can rep you but the system wont let me. I tell guys single moms are no different than what they were when they did not have kids. THey still want a man that is attractive, a man with ambition, a man that desires them, a man that they can build with and so forth. Both a single mom needs be weary of what guy she is going for, also a guy going into a relationship with a single mom must know his boundaries, and look out for certain idioms of dating a single mom like time management, or her kids come first and not you. Also as a single guy, if I see a single mom put me before her kids, I wont date her anymore. Its not a good look in my book for character.
Well with ^^^^ mindset your buggered either way mate as you really do need to look at a person as the individual that they are
Since I got a few replies along these lines I'm thinking I haven't expressed myself correctly.
All I'm saying is most of the younger girls I've met lately seem to be either addicted to their phones, are lacking upstairs, or are extremely immature. I don't remember it being that way before, but I'm assuming part of it is the time we live in and part of it is where I'm at in my life.
And the only women I've met that are single and a bit older are single mothers. The single, older women without children have, by in large, been either nuts, turned into Jesus freaks, or are holding onto some sort of ideology that has completely ruined any chance they've had to live a happy life with someone.
More to the point I was mainly just looking for concerns dating them that would be different than dating someone who's single.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Londoncowboy30
Not saying you wouldn't but your post comes across as you're looking at it as more of a curiosity as you feel you have to settle ( instead of finding one your own age without kids ) which naturally won't be flattering to the lady and will end in heartache as it would become apparent sooner rather than later.
Well, my assumption is while I can still date 18 on up without any problem now there will come a time when I won't be able to do so.
Currently, as far as I know, I've only been out with one single mother. That was pretty much a disaster. She was messing with her phone on the one date. And on the other one I ended up meeting two of her kids the next morning. Oh, and she failed to mention she was married (or rather separated with an on and off thing).
I do know a couple quality women that I knew before they had kids and now are still interested.
Quote:
Originally Posted by johngolf
Port
What is your end game in dating?
Ideally I'd like to find someone who's old enough that they don't feel the need to go out to the club every night/weekend, but is still young enough to have her looks for a while, isn't completely nuts or empty headed. Preferably someone who's at least starting to think about getting their life together. Beyond that I don't have much of an idea.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chowhound
I think a guy in his 30's may be in a rough position because at that age the single mothers that do have kids they tend to be young and that to me is the rough part because they tend to need more attention from mom.
I figure it might be an unavoidable reality at some point as one of the groups of women I tend to be attracted to and click with are Latin women and a lot of them tend to have more focus on the family and thus have kids earlier. After that mixed women, but I can't say anything generally holds true with them as a group though.
Oddly, when dating out, I've been with Asian women the most, but also had the least in common with them.
So if not single mothers then what? Just keep going to bed with models and co-eds and be satisfied with long odds on finding one that I enjoy being around beyond the bedroom? Sounds kind of lonely.
Last edited by Port Pitt Ash; 06-05-2017 at 04:24 AM..
Since I got a few replies along these lines I'm thinking I haven't expressed myself correctly.
All I'm saying is most of the younger girls I've met lately seem to be either addicted to their phones, are lacking upstairs, or are extremely immature. I don't remember it being that way before, but I'm assuming part of it is the time we live in and part of it is where I'm at in my life.
And the only women I've met that are single and a bit older are single mothers. The single, older women without children have, by in large, been either nuts, turned into Jesus freaks, or are holding onto some sort of ideology that has completely ruined any chance they've had to live a happy life with someone.
More to the point I was mainly just looking for concerns dating them that would be different than dating someone who's single.
Well, my assumption is while I can still date 18 on up without any problem now there will come a time when I won't be able to do so.
Currently, as far as I know, I've only been out with one single mother. That was pretty much a disaster. She was messing with her phone on the one date. And on the other one I ended up meeting two of her kids the next morning. Oh, and she failed to mention she was married (or rather separated with an on and off thing).
I do know a couple quality women that I knew before they had kids and now are still interested.
Ideally I'd like to find someone who's old enough that they don't feel the need to go out to the club every night/weekend, but is still young enough to have her looks for a while, isn't completely nuts or empty headed. Preferably someone who's at least starting to think about getting their life together. Beyond that I don't have much of an idea.
Ok i was sort of right lol but thanks for the clarification mate
To be honest I don't know how old you are but I think you're overthinking this and if you're this out going and social you shouldn't really have many problems in meeting someone that is your " ideal "
The main thing you have to do ( after reading the above ) is being more open minded when approaching an individual instead of already thinking " she's a Jesus freak, Nuts " etc and any other negative trait you can think of and take her solely on face value
To be honest I don't know how old you are but I think you're overthinking this and if you're this out going and social you shouldn't really have many problems in meeting someone that is your " ideal "
The main thing you have to do ( after reading the above ) is being more open minded when approaching an individual instead of already thinking " she's a Jesus freak, Nuts " etc and any other negative trait you can think of and take her solely on face value
I've been a bit of a monk since I moved to the south compared to my past experiences. I'd say I've probably only met a few hundred women in various cities within 6 hours of here. Then there are the ones online that I talked to for a bit, but never took it beyond that. Pretty hard pressed to find more than a handful of dateable girls, let alone an ideal.
The whole Jesus freak, nuts, etc. aren't generalizations, but actually women I've either met, know, or talked to online.
So if not single mothers then what? Just keep going to bed with models and co-eds and be satisfied with long odds on finding one that I enjoy being around beyond the bedroom? Sounds kind of lonely.
LOL settle down, playa.
Seriously, there's a wide variety of women who aren't "models and co-eds." It's hard to get past the serious generalizing you're doing.
If you don't like the fish you're catching, try another spot.
You're just gonna have to try different things that will put you in proximity with a different class of people.
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