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If they are mean to the pet, absolutely not. But 'bond' can cover plenty of territory.
When my wife and I started dating, she had a hyperactive Brittany Spaniel. Holy smokes, that thing was high maintenance. Not Jack Russell Terrier kind of hyper, but hyper enough. I fed the dog and walked the dog, but never bonded with the dog. I also once had to, fighting 103-degree temperature and wearing a flannel bathrobe, chase the dog through the neighborhood when she got out of the back yard. But when it was time to put it down after several months of fighting off congestive heart failure, I was the one to take her to the vet's office and be with her when it was time to go.
In other words, it's unrealistic to expect someone else to have the same kind of connection to your pet that you do. Kind to animals is one thing. That should be non-negotiable. Being over the moon smitten with your animal is another.
I think the people of CD would be a much happier bunch if they stopped thinking of new ways to screen out potential partners in life.
Whenever I'd bring a woman to my apartment sometimes my pit bull would growl at them. I would always tell her to behave but I realized that my dog was warning me the woman was bad news. I have two dogs now and if you can't bond with or don't like my pets then we aren't compatible.
So do the women usually behave when you tell them to?
If a guy I was dating was More into his pet to the point it invaded our quality time...then yeah I can leave with no regrets.
My dog has a warm place in my heart and I take good care in being a pet owner. I also take great care in being a loving girl friend. I can balance both. Its not a choice,either me or the pet. Its an expansion of including some other living and lovable being into the home.
To be fair, I do not care for cats...(yeah I know they are very independent and quiet...yadda yadda)so I doubt I'd even date a guy that has such a critter. So such need not apply.
No, of course it would not be acceptable! I used to have a cat, and I always paid very close attention to how he was treated by any guys who came to my home. I also paid attention to how my cat responded to each one. He was an excellent judge of character. He waited until I was dating my husband, and gave him a very rare seal of approval, before he peaced out just shy of his 19th birthday. Passed the torch, so to speak.
A few weeks later, my now husband and I picked out a puppy together and have all been happily loving each other ever since.
Very reasonable....I have to think that if someone REALLY picked their pet over the girl/boyfriend then there was enough wrong in the relationship that it wouldn't have worked, regardless.
No there is nothing reasonable about throwing a pet out over a relationship.
When I adopt a pet, I am choosing to accept that pet and responsibility for the duration of its life. Of course knowing that, I only date men that have a good heart towards all animals.
I have to date someone that will be understanding on the off chance, I am curled up in a pen cuddling with a Holstein calf and completely covered in hair during our date. I also stop in the middle of roads to rescue turtles, kittens, and dogs.
I had two cats and my husband was never fond of cats in general, but he was always nice to them.
I have a dog now, and so does my husband.
I could date someone who wasn't fond of dogs, but they are in doors, so probably couldn't live with someone who didn't like them.
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I don't have any pets because of allergies, but I grew up with cats, so I'm not really a dog person. I like dogs okay, but I was bit by a neighbor's dog as a kid, so I really don't like big dogs that are out of control. I briefly dated a guy who had one of those dogs--he didn't really train it well, and it was always jumping and licking and barking. I hated going to his house, and we always had to go to his house because his dog was so bad he couldn't leave it alone for very long. Plus, I'm not a huge fan of the dog on the couch, and especially in the bed. If someone's pet is well-trained and unobtrusive, generally a good boy, that's fine by me.
Last edited by fleetiebelle; 06-15-2017 at 12:33 PM..
I really do not care how my spouse feels about it as long as they do not mistreat them.
I think it's unhealthy to put pets over poeple in such a way that their inclusion in your life would dictate all your relationships outside of the one you and your pet shares
Pets, no matter how beloved, are only in our lives for a few years (15 if you're lucky, more like 8-12). I would not require a potential boyfriend to adore and bond with my pet, but I would expect them to at least be kind to them -- i.e., refill the water bowl if they notice it's empty, let the dog out in the fenced backyard if they beat me home from work, etc. I would do the same. If a man couldn't do that, then they are probably going to be pretty selfish/clueless in other areas -- and probably not my type.
When we first got married, my husband had two cats. I had never been around cats much. The cats spent the first summer avoiding me like the plague. It was mutual, but I still would feed them, clean the litter box, etc. It's not in me to be cruel to an animal. Eventually, the cats decided I was there to stay, and one day I came home from work, and there was a dead bird lying on the welcome mat -- a gift from the cats. They were milling around as if "Oh, I hope she likes it! Do you think she likes it?" I stared at it, and said to the cats, "Why, thank you so much! Can you please take it away now?" stepped over it, and went in the house. Came back out a few minutes later, and the bird was gone. Cats decided I wasn't so bad.
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