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You getting all worked up over basic work/income/stability questions, is like a woman on a date getting all worked up because her date is looking her up and down.
Both "judgments" are hardwired. They're just different for men and women.
If renting isn't considered stable then that's just one of many reasons for me or any other guy to continue to date younger women. I'm not looking to marry someone on the 2nd date.
I'm not looking into buying a house right now because I don't know if I want to live where I'm at right now for many more years. If a woman was going to make a big deal out of that I wouldn't want to date her and I'm certainly not spending money on her. This 2017 not 1917 things have changed.
It's almost like it's some sort of sense of self entitlement thing. If myself as a man asks a woman out it's because I just want someone to do something with. I'm not asking her out to be judged. It's just a date and some company.
Quite a few of my closest friends didn't buy a house until after they were married. Including my brother.
We're not looking for reasons to date younger, we're looking for reasons why we shouldn't. Do you have any for someone such as myself?
This board quite often doesn't appear to represent normal opinions and ideologies.
All in all, it's a lot of truly horrible advice. I feel bad for anyone that actually uses it for that.
Last edited by wanderlust76; 06-15-2017 at 03:24 PM..
I've been thinking about it and I've never had to "interview" a guy on a date as long as he was engaging. Usually they volunteered information about themselves naturally in conversation. The only time I had to actually ask questions was when the guy didn't converse and just sat there. And I've never asked or cared if a guy rented or owned a home. Then again, usually in conversation someone will reference their house or apartment and you can put two and two together.
I've been thinking about it and I've never had to "interview" a guy on a date as long as he was engaging. Usually they volunteered information about themselves naturally in conversation. The only time I had to actually ask questions was when the guy didn't converse and just sat there. And I've never asked or cared if a guy rented or owned a home. Then again, usually in conversation someone will reference their house or apartment and you can put two and two together.
Same here. While on a date, I always tried to be gracious and keep the first few dates conversationally light-hearted. Being "interviewed" is not enjoyable for either party and I understand why so many people say they hate dating if that is how a lot of people are approaching it.
I think people need to lighten up and just try to enjoy themselves while getting to know a new person. Anyway, you learn more about a person by listening, and men like to talk about themselves without too much prompting from my experience. I never felt the need to interrogate a man. They volunteered all the info I ever needed to know, aside from a couple of men who under shared info about their vices.
In my 20s I often dated older men (up to 10 years older) which was fine, but I wouldn't want to marry an older man. I married younger.
It depends on the individual...I'm 31 and tend to be a far better fit for the 21-25 age group than 30+. Any time I meet somebody my own age, they basically are 100% stuck on trying to fast-track into a serious relationship with talk of marriage/kids/etc being a very real goal; and in all reality, that's completely fine. The only problem, is that I don't exactly want any of that and am not interested in wasting either their time or my own.
Seriously...one of the worst things a guy can do is waste a woman's time, especially if she's in her 30s and doing the whole "biological clock" expectations routine...doesn't matter if you agree or disagree with it, it's her predisposed outlook and how she's going to live. I work with kids for a living and don't want my own, and am not necessarily convinced that marriage is a good idea...so there's no real point in leading somebody on when they're after those two things and I'm not. My life outside of work revolves heavily on staying active through hobbies, travel, and socialization...meeting people happens frequently and I'm happy overall just keeping things simple with no need to change that. I'm also completely capable of being happy on my own as well...freedom is a wonderful thing.
Due to the above outlook and the fact that I'm basically a typical millennial about a lot of things, I honestly do so much better with younger women. They're attracted to me, I'm attracted to them, I have zero baggage or anything to hide, and it results in what's usually just a fun "hey let's go be together" type of dating relationship that's as simple as it gets. This is the sort of thing that I'm more or less after and enjoy the most...dating should be fun and it's best when you can just click the lever into autopilot and not have anything to worry about other than enjoying each other for as long as it lasts.
It also makes a difference if you are worth having and have something to offer as a person, or if you're just a "creepy guy" looking to hit on younger girls...it works for me because I'm the former and not the latter. Nobody should ever be "the creepy guy hitting on young girls". Constant self-improvement and effort to keep yourself both physically, mentally, and culturally up-to-date and in shape is another big thing to consider. You can't force yourself to be something that you're not...but if it comes natural and you enjoy keeping up with the world, then it does go a long way to help make you more attractive.
To the OP...if you have an outlook on life similar to mine and most importantly, can learn not to sabotage yourself and over think, then there's nothing wrong with dating younger. You really do have to be a certain type of person though for it to work for both you and the girl though; you can't be stressful, demanding, controlling, needy, etc either...having a huge conscience helps a lot too, and you don't date them because "they're low mileage".
Last edited by TelecasterBlues; 06-15-2017 at 06:17 PM..
I've been thinking about it and I've never had to "interview" a guy on a date as long as he was engaging. Usually they volunteered information about themselves naturally in conversation. The only time I had to actually ask questions was when the guy didn't converse and just sat there. And I've never asked or cared if a guy rented or owned a home. Then again, usually in conversation someone will reference their house or apartment and you can put two and two together.
Agreed-- the interview part just sounded familiar because I recently did say: "Sorry this seems like an interview." Now that I think about it, that's the reason it didn't go well. I don't like to have to pull teeth to find out about somebody. I don't mind talking about myself, so I don't see what the problem is.
Now in keeping with the topic of the thread, I didn't do that in my twenties, only looks mattered. So who cares, go for whatever you want guys!
Agreed-- the interview part just sounded familiar because I recently did say: "Sorry this seems like an interview." Now that I think about it, that's the reason it didn't go well. I don't like to have to pull teeth to find out about somebody. I don't mind talking about myself, so I don't see what the problem is.
Now in keeping with the topic of the thread, I didn't do that in my twenties, only looks mattered. So who cares, go for whatever you want guys!
I agree 100%! The conversation has to at least flow somewhat...
As others have said, date whomever you choose gentlemen. But there is no need to bash anyone else just because they are not in a specific age range that you desire.
I guess this is for men, but also men over 30...do you feel like it is difficult to connect with girls aged 21-25? Sexually I think most men would be most attracted to this age group, but does the mindset/life stage differences are too big?
I feel like women in their 30s know what they want from life and relationship, that's a plus. But overall the physical aspect, plus 'low mileage' (if you care at all about history, some don't, same may apply for men, to avoid being called sexist lol), overall tends to tip the scale towards younger girls (if you are 30 something year old male).
The alignment, suspension and ride is much more enduring than a nice chassis. Too much 'flashy chassis' and no miles is akin to that old saying "a car wasn't meant to stay in the garage". There's also a corollary that just going to church / temple etc. doesn't make one a devout (insert whatever religion)
Now if she says in a Mae West tone that I can park my car in her garage anytime she's already got some personality....
Seriously, you have no idea if you don't talk to a woman and get to know her whether she may be young and ditzy or wise beyond her years and the level of sexual experience knows no specific correlation as women come from all sorts of backgrounds on sexual mores and values and while chronological age may be presumed to come with experience you will not know until you get to know a woman.
Why don't you just focus on one you can talk to and go from there without a pretext for instant gratification of sex? I find the playful nature a woman will exude when she is relaxed around you will often telegraph her level of enjoyment versus say a 'odometer' reading.
Most any female in her right mind knows men enjoy sex you have to learn to sublimate your desires initially so it doesn't subsume your ability to get to know her as a person. JMHO Your Mileage May Vary hahahaha
Yup, plus construction was better quality back in the day. Craftsmanship mattered.
I agree. Well tuned, reasonably used model that had followed recommended maintenance schedule could provide years of enjoyable trouble free operation.
On the other hand, brand new model has to be broken in and started on regular maintenance schedule. Some models handle this process easily, some show excessive wear and tear. There is a lot of uncertainty but successful outcomes are extremely enjoyable.
As always in life, there are advantages and disadvantages in any choice.
If only you could find a well-maintained, sought-after vehicle that has all up to date maintenance records but also is fun to talk to and doesn't make you roll your eyes every time she opens her mouth.
Spilt drink!
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