Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Interesting post. Thanks for sharing. Why did you used to be terrified of talking to women, and why do you still sometimes blush when doing so? Did you not have any sisters or female cousins, or friends who were girls when you were growing up? Is it your shyness that makes you blush, or do you only approach babes to talk to, so their babeness makes you blush?
Help us understand this phenom.
I can only explain, and to some extent that means make educated guesses about what was and is going on with me. I'm sure other men have similar experiences, and I'm sure mine isn't universal.
I have a sister who is 6 yrs older than me. I annoyed her and her friends as a kid, but they thought I was cute or goofy and really treated me well.
I've always been anxious. I think that's mostly inherent, so I think I brought that to my experiences.
School was pretty rough, with a lot of appearance oriented teasing. Not awful or nightmarish, but more crap than most kids endured. It was from boys and girls, and while I never thought I deserved it, I never felt like the kids doing it were jerks. Teasing is what kids do, and I was one of the kids who got teased a lot. If a boy went too far, we fought. If a girl went too far, I just walked away hurt.
To be honest, I was a funny looking kid. There are pictures. I really can't deny it .
So I was shy. I had experiences that didn't scar me, but they didn't give me much confidence. Blushing happens when I'm embarrassed, whatever the context. With boy-girl stuff, I guess because I didn't think I had much going for me looks wise I felt I needed to say or do the " just right" thing, which made it more likely that I wouldn't. So I'd mess up a bit, blush, feel bad about blushing and about the experience, and start a cycle that was hard to break. Led to a lot of anticipatory anxiety.
I still blush, even with my partner. She finds it endearing. I learned a long time ago to roll with it. It gives me a goofy aura that cuts my hyper-seriousness a bit. My ex hated that part of me, but since her my goofy blush prone side has served me well, weeding out women I wouldn't ultimately be happy with, so I've got that going for me.
If used in a fun, flirty, or even friendly manner, I don't mind being referred to as boy. I generally use ladies and women but girl is used with people I know. I don't know any female who takes offense to being referred to as "girl" as long as it is again... fun, friendly, etc.. intent.
If you have a low opinion of the opposite sex, then it will show... and guess what? you won't have much luck developing relationships.
I know I'd rather be referred to as a guy than as a man. It certainly makes me feel younger.
But would you like to be called a boy? That's the equivalent.
I said it before, that in casual situations calling a woman a girl isn't necessarily a problem, though it can be said in a condescending or insulting context. It's more problematic in workplace situations--if you wouldn't say "ask the boys where they are on the project" then don't use "girls" in the same way.
I don't disagree with everything the OP said, but I don't like the ''Call us women, instead of girls'' or whatever she said. What's the big deal? Most girls (oops!) I know, are fine with people referring to them as a girl and not a woman. Some have even said it makes them feel younger.
I know I'd rather be referred to as a guy than as a man. It certainly makes me feel younger. That kind of makes me feel like that post from a few weeks back where someone was visiting from the year 1917 and told another poster that referring to a girl (Oops, I did it again! No pun intended!) he likes HOT was ''Not classy'' of him.
I could not care less what people call me. I had a BF that called me girl. It refers specifically to the I can't get a date with girls. But lets face it, no one agrees with me. Maybe it is a weird pet thing of mine.
I can only explain, and to some extent that means make educated guesses about what was and is going on with me. I'm sure other men have similar experiences, and I'm sure mine isn't universal.
I have a sister who is 6 yrs older than me. I annoyed her and her friends as a kid, but they thought I was cute or goofy and really treated me well.
I've always been anxious. I think that's mostly inherent, so I think I brought that to my experiences.
School was pretty rough, with a lot of appearance oriented teasing. Not awful or nightmarish, but more crap than most kids endured. It was from boys and girls, and while I never thought I deserved it, I never felt like the kids doing it were jerks. Teasing is what kids do, and I was one of the kids who got teased a lot. If a boy went too far, we fought. If a girl went too far, I just walked away hurt.
To be honest, I was a funny looking kid. There are pictures. I really can't deny it .
So I was shy. I had experiences that didn't scar me, but they didn't give me much confidence. Blushing happens when I'm embarrassed, whatever the context. With boy-girl stuff, I guess because I didn't think I had much going for me looks wise I felt I needed to say or do the " just right" thing, which made it more likely that I wouldn't. So I'd mess up a bit, blush, feel bad about blushing and about the experience, and start a cycle that was hard to break. Led to a lot of anticipatory anxiety.
I still blush, even with my partner. She finds it endearing. I learned a long time ago to roll with it. It gives me a goofy aura that cuts my hyper-seriousness a bit. My ex hated that part of me, but since her my goofy blush prone side has served me well, weeding out women I wouldn't ultimately be happy with, so I've got that going for me.
Ugh. School is the WORST place to form dating experiences. But that is where we all try to do it. I did not get anywhere until I realize that it was a weird microcosm where everyone was somewhere between immature to down right mean. Who I am NOW is what matters.
I was really skinny. I was 2 years younger than my grade mates, so not a social thing. I never new what was going on. Fast forward to 21 when I decided to say <the two letter expletive> that nonsense was kid's stuff and does not need to define me that dating, and later marriage, became possible.
If used in a fun, flirty, or even friendly manner, I don't mind being referred to as boy. I generally use ladies and women but girl is used with people I know. I don't know any female who takes offense to being referred to as "girl" as long as it is again... fun, friendly, etc.. intent.
If you have a low opinion of the opposite sex, then it will show... and guess what? you won't have much luck developing relationships.
Eh, lots of adult women call men boys, and say boyfriend, or whatever. They call their female friends girls.
I'm a boy. I like girls. It just means male and female to me. Whatever. A professional setting is different, of course.
Agreed. As long as the time is not disrespectful, girl , girls is fine with my friends and I.
All of you posters responding with "You call yourselves "girls"!!!1!!1" are missing the point.
Certain African American people call themselves and others a name I will not mention. Because they call themselves that name, does that mean YOU get to call them that name?
All of you posters responding with "You call yourselves "girls"!!!1!!1" are missing the point.
Certain African American people call themselves and others a name I will not mention. Because they call themselves that name, does that mean YOU get to call them that name?
Nope.
Moving on...
I agree with this... but it can be an intimate pet name in certain circumstances. Someone called me that at work. Um. We had some words. I won.
I think a lot of the young men who come here and complain the loudest, are just here to vent their frustrations and don't really want advice, especially not from women.
That's why I don't offer much advice to them, I find it's taken better if they hear it from other men.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
. 
) he likes HOT was ''Not classy'' of him.