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Location: In the cold, dark wasteland of eternity...
926 posts, read 674,019 times
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I'm in a weird situation right now.
I have an awesome guyfriend that I've known for over 2 years...he knows everything that happened with my most recent ex...and he's been very respectful, kind and supportive of me during this horrific (but thankfully short) time of that relationship. He has just revealed to me tonight that if he ever had the chance, he would like to date me and see where that leads.
Since I've moved on from my last relationship emotionally and physically and have moved into my own apartment this summer, we've naturally grown closer to each other during this time. He has been sharing with me about his dating woes with women who seem to be a good match but then either flake out or ghost on him. We have been in constant communication via phone convos and text during the entire time I've known him. We're planning on meeting up over the holidays to just hang out and have fun without any expectations of anything.
Just wondering if anyone else here has ever taken this leap with a platonic friend (if it has been revealed that you BOTH felt attracted to each other in a romantic way) and if it ever led to anything more - and if it didn't, if you both just remained friends with each other OR if it ruined your friendship to the point that you both ended the friendship altogether.
While talking on the phone tonight, we both agreed that we don't want to ruin the awesome friendship that we have with each other...but at the same time, we want to try and date each other to see what will come of it.
What would any of you do if you were me?!
Last edited by AprilFlowers17; 11-04-2017 at 12:02 AM..
Answering for myself since I can’t answer for you:
Assuming I was single that would depend on a variety of factors and largely dependent on what their goals would be in wanting a relationship in the first place.
You have to weigh the ups and downs and decide for yourself if it’s worth the attempt.
Either way, the relationship wouldn’t be handled the same way if I understood they or myself wanted something more, You can’t just take it back once it’s out their.
It’s no longer plutonic when intentions are known just becuase nothing is happening with the knowledge.
I would say you've already progressed to the next level. It would seem logical to me to continue that path since you two have already establish a relationship (bond?) over time.
I have an awesome guyfriend that I've known for over 2 years...he knows everything that happened with my most recent ex...and he's been very respectful, kind and supportive of me during this horrific (but thankfully short) time of that relationship. He has just revealed to me tonight that if he ever had the chance, he would like to date me and see where that leads.
Since I've moved on from my last relationship emotionally and physically and have moved into my own apartment this summer, we've naturally grown closer to each other during this time. He has been sharing with me about his dating woes with women who seem to be a good match but then either flake out or ghost on him. We have been in constant communication via phone convos and text during the entire time I've known him. We're planning on meeting up over the holidays to just hang out and have fun without any expectations of anything.
Just wondering if anyone else here has ever taken this leap with a platonic friend (if it has been revealed that you BOTH felt attracted to each other in a romantic way) and if it ever led to anything more - and if it didn't, if you both just remained friends with each other OR if it ruined your friendship to the point that you both ended the friendship altogether.
While talking on the phone tonight, we both agreed that we don't want to ruin the awesome friendship that we have with each other...but at the same time, we want to try and date each other to see what will come of it.
What would any of you do if you were me?!
Why not I say go for it! Life is about taking chances. You both seem like you are ready for the next level. I hope everything will work out for you.
Just know that if it doesn’t work, it’s ok to have space from eachother even if it’s for a few months before things can get back to normal. Hopefully whatever happens you won’t lose your friendship, that is the most important thing.
Why not I say go for it! Life is about taking chances. You both seem like you are ready for the next level. I hope everything will work out for you.
Just know that if it doesn’t work, it’s ok to have space from eachother even if it’s for a few months before things can get back to normal. Hopefully whatever happens you won’t lose your friendship, that is the most important thing.
I go with this. I say try it out! Worst case scenario, you discover that the intimate spark isn't there. You can still be friends.
...so I guess you're not REALLY platonic then? Since you're at least kinda "feelin' it"?
And if it is even less feeling than that then I'd say you are foolish to risk the friendship if there is only a 25%-ish chance that there is any romance at all. You sound very lukewarm - are you so desperate for a "ROMANCE"? Leave it alone and be patient for a real opportunity.
P.S. - so reading further, you're not platonic at all? Then why slap a platonic label on it when you were really just pre-romance? Platonic is reserved for when you've truly been friends for a long time without a thought to romance.
I'm in a similliar situation though I don't know if feelings are reciprocated..
Part of me does love her so much that I do worry about losing her as a friend if she says no or if we did date and it didn't workout.
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