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It's only one sided if you are talking about the 22-32 year old crowd - which is hideously, unbelievably one sided with the women having all the power. If you are a late 20s male going for a mid 20s woman, you generally have to aim for 4 levels below your league to have any realistic chance.
but after about 30-32, it's basically completely even and I would even argue men having advantage. I told the story of my 43 year old very broke, chubby, bald, broke roommate consistently having a great dating life going after women in their 30s. I see women in their 30s and 40s approaching men, initiating conversation, making it very easy to go after them all the time. Approaching them is pretty damn easy also - if they're single, they will welcome any normal decent looking guy who talks to them like a normal human being and is friendly/polite/pleasant. I even see real attractive 35 year old women going after men. If you're approaching women in their 20s, you basically need to treat it like extremely complex rocket science to have any shot at all. Approaching women in their 30s - just cut out the nonsense, be genuine and they will generally like you
Though you sound a bit jaded, you make some good points. Women in their thirties and forties are more mature. And if they are single, they have been there and done that and don't have time for games and like men who approach with some level of decency.
While I understand the appeal and attractiveness to be with women in their 20s, many of them are also still discovering themselves. But remember that women in their 20s don't stay in their 20s forever if they have the fortune to live long enough. So if you keep focusing too much on age, you will never be satisfied.
Though you sound a bit jaded, you make some good points. Women in their thirties and forties are more mature. And if they are single, they have been there and done that and don't have time for games and like men who approach with some level of decency.
While I understand the appeal and attractiveness to be with women in their 20s, many of them are also still discovering themselves. But remember that women in their 20s don't stay in their 20s forever if they have the fortune to live long enough. So if you keep focusing too much on age, you will never be satisfied.
I'm not a 45 year old guy looking for a 22 year old. I'm a 29 year old male looking for a 26-27 year old, I think that's normal
If I'm single until I'm 40, I'll be looking for women around 35-37
I'm not a 45 year old guy looking for a 22 year old. I'm a 29 year old male looking for a 26-27 year old, I think that's normal
If I'm single until I'm 40, I'll be looking for women around 35-37
I'm not saying that what you are asking for is not realistic. But the women you are checking for are not checking for you, even though they are in your age range.
And I am not saying that as a 29 year old you should date a 45 year old woman if that is not what you want. But as a man who is almost 30 I just don't see why you can't date women in their thirties. Not all women age bad and if you were to stop focusing on that, maybe you could find someone.
I am only speaking from experience. It took me a long time to figure out that the reason I was not getting dates is because I was fishing in the wrong pond. You have to find your audience. Once you find your audience, you will start to meet more people. For a long time, I sought an audience with certain types of men with whom it took me years to realize that those men were not interested in me no matter how much I tried. And that left me single for years. I have finally found who my audience is and things are starting to improve for me. Again, I am just telling you from experience that this is what works.
It's only one sided if you are talking about the 22-32 year old crowd - which is hideously, unbelievably one sided with the women having all the power. If you are a late 20s male going for a mid 20s woman, you generally have to aim for 4 levels below your league to have any realistic chance.
but after about 30-32, it's basically completely even and I would even argue men having advantage. I told the story of my 43 year old very broke, chubby, bald, broke roommate consistently having a great dating life going after women in their 30s. I see women in their 30s and 40s approaching men, initiating conversation, making it very easy to go after them all the time. Approaching them is pretty damn easy also - if they're single, they will welcome any normal decent looking guy who talks to them like a normal human being and is friendly/polite/pleasant. I even see real attractive 35 year old women going after men. If you're approaching women in their 20s, you basically need to treat it like extremely complex rocket science to have any shot at all. Approaching women in their 30s - just cut out the nonsense, be genuine and they will generally like you
Discuss
Traditionally, men were the wage earners. Attractive women would marry for the money and status.
Now they can be 'independent' of men.
So they remain single through their 20s.. focused on career, etc... waiting for Mr. Perfect. Sex comes easy for them on demand.
Mr. Perfect never comes, maybe they had a child or two to a fling or bypassing boyfriend, and now you have a single mom in her 30s.
In the 30s, looks fade, kids become "their world", and their standards decrease. Oddly enough, their sex drive increases.
Traditionally, men were the wage earners. Attractive women would marry for the money and status.
Now they can be 'independent' of men.
So they remain single through their 20s.. focused on career, etc... waiting for Mr. Perfect. Sex comes easy for them on demand.
Mr. Perfect never comes, maybe they had a child or two to a fling or bypassing boyfriend, and now you have a single mom in her 30s.
In the 30s, looks fade, kids become "their world", and their standards decrease. Oddly enough, their sex drive increases.
crazy paradox.. there is the pathology.
Not this carp again.
The average age for a first marriage for women in the U.S. is only 27.
EVERYBODY waits longer now than in the past (again using averages, 27 for a woman, 29 for a man) because of school, and choice. And most people are having sex during that time, sure. Women AND men.
Is the idea here that the guys DON'T "waste" their early/mid-20s running around having sex instead of being serious, monogamous and saving it? Because...LOL.
Young people are young people. They act young because they are young. They wait until late 20s because they know they can't handle marriage. Then after they have a solid education and have grown up a tad, they tie the knot. Some wait until later than that, to meet someone they CAN live with, in fear of divorce otherwise. This is a bad thing, a punishable offense (but of course, only the woman must be punished for this, sneered at for her declining market value because she just HAD to have her fun and freedom? How dare she, now see what happens, she is a hag of 30 and blah, blah, barf)?
I see no gigantic condemnation here. It actually sounds pretty smart. Wait until you have a degree of maturity to settle down. Well duh.
We constantly hear from men aging out from their own strict parameters complaining that young women act young, and sneering to the effect that don't worry these women will wind up THIRTY and getting what all their playing deserved...now they're ALL DESPERATE.
Nope, LOL.
Women beyond their 30s approach because they are more mature and know themselves better. There is no comeuppance. It is as simple as this: people grow up.
For the OP, it won't matter much. He is not desired by females close to his age or even substantial younger ones.
I'm beginning to wonder if it is about being on the spectrum. This lather-rinse-repeat has been going on for years, the same script, the same responses. At the very least, OCD tendencies.
For whoever repped me stating this doesn't include those women in their 30s with no kids who's age hasn't deteriorated their looks, they are few and far between.
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