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That was kind of my opinion... I told him if it really bothered him he would be looking into changing my name to his, but since he is not, my last name really does not concern him.
The truck issue has been going on 10 years. I think I finally have him ready to move forward to put the truck in his name. Bottom line is he is immature, not responsible and needs his hand held to do adult things like owning vehicles and maintaining employment. I am fairly certain part of the issue was insurance reasons. It is easier for him to keep insurance if my name is on his policy. I also get better rates because I do not have years of not having a valid license on my record, accidents, tickets and all the other nonsense he has not yet outgrown at the age of 40...
The divorce decree said he needed to put it in his name within 30 days. That was over a decade ago.
I'm on your side re: your last name. As far as your last name, I think keeping the name of your child is a good thing for all the same reasons you've stated.
Otherwise, re: the truck....Not very logical. So, you are willing for your ex to trash your record too? What you should have done is pick that truck up, it's in your name....back when he didn't follow through 10 years ago? until he refinanced it in his name only, as court ordered.
And, are we talking about the same truck he had....or have you continued for 10 years to be on his credit and insurance with replacement vehicles?
I have no daily reminders of my ex. It really only becomes up in conversation every few years when he either gets a ticket, violations or forgets to pay for tags or insurance. I call him and remind him to do whatever he does, and we move on. We do not even fight about it and have a non confrontational relationship at this point.
I have asked for years to put it in his name. He has been the hold up but I think he is ready now so we will be doing it before the end of the year. The names are the bigger issue.
Why does it matter to my bf, brother, ex and his new woman what name I use? It has been my last name almost 1/2 my life at this point.
I understand. I did change my name back after my divorce, and all I will say is what a hassle!! Not to mention expensive. If I remarry, I will only be changing it socially. I dont know why it bothers him. Thats wierd.
Right at this point it will be very costly and time consuming to change.
[snip] As for the last name, it shouldn't be your boyfriend's concern. I don't really see the issue unless he's the type that gets bent over something like this. Take care of the truck issue and be done with your ex.
I have had the same bf for the last couple years. Considering we share a child and he is still close to many of my family members, my ex husband will never be completely gone from my life. I am just thankful we are cordial, and no conflict.
My mother was married to my father for about 20 years. When she divorced him, she kept the married name and did not revert to her maiden name. When she remarried, she used my stepfather's name for social and legal purposes, but at work she did not change her name to my stepfather's name but rather retained my father's name.
I doubt very much whether my mother and stepfather ever discussed it, but if they did I am positive that she told him how it was going to be and he said something along the lines of "OK, it's your business".
My mother and stepfather were married 40 years until they died, so whatever stress there may have been regarding names it clearly wasn't very important. I suggest that you take the same approach, as in: "It's my business and you have no say about it". Stand up for yourself!
I'm on your side re: your last name. As far as your last name, I think keeping the name of your child is a good thing for all the same reasons you've stated.
Otherwise, re: the truck....Not very logical. So, you are willing for your ex to trash your record too? What you should have done is pick that truck up, it's in your name....back when he didn't follow through 10 years ago? until he refinanced it in his name only, as court ordered.
And, are we talking about the same truck he had....or have you continued for 10 years to be on his credit and insurance with replacement vehicles?
It is not as simple as going to pick it up. He got the truck in the divorce, as listed in the divorce decree. I paid cash for it so I had no loans on it. He has to include me on his insurance policy. Same truck he has been driving since before our marriage. I bought it as a gift for him while we are still dating. I do not want the truck.
My mother was married to my father for about 20 years. When she divorced him, she kept the married name and did not revert to her maiden name. When she remarried, she used my stepfather's name for social and legal purposes, but at work she did not change her name to my stepfather's name but rather retained my father's name.
I doubt very much whether my mother and stepfather ever discussed it, but if they did I am positive that she told him how it was going to be and he said something along the lines of "OK, it's your business".
My mother and stepfather were married 40 years until they died, so whatever stress there may have been regarding names it clearly wasn't very important. I suggest that you take the same approach, as in: "It's my business and you have no say about it". Stand up for yourself!
I do stand up for myself... which is why I am described as "uncompromising, set in my ways, and won't change for anyone" as said by at least the last five men I have dated.
Well, there are men who like a strong woman. My guess is that the accurate description is not "won't change for anyone", but rather "won't do stupid stuff or act like an idiot just because I want her to". Am I right?
Well, there are men who like a strong woman. My guess is that the accurate description is not "won't change for anyone", but rather "won't do stupid stuff or act like an idiot just because I want her to". Am I right?
Or "won't let me have total control over her". Not sure which, but I have been doing my own thing for quite some time without major hiccups and bumps.
What is several/couple to you? 12 months? it hasn't been THAT long ago you were on here complaining about different boyfriends. So you are either mistaken on how long you were together or you have been dating multiple guys all along and just posting stories to entertain people with here.
I won't say "I told you so"(general you)...
OP,
Why does the ex 'have' to have your name on the insurance?
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