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I have been to packed bars on Friday and Saturday nights on an off for about a dozen years, full of people in their 20's and 30's. I have noticed that people tend to stick with their groups, and pretty much only talk to others in their group. It makes sense as far as couples go (that bring up another question as to why couples would go) but it also happens with groups of women or mixed-sex groups.
What is going on here, do people actually meet other people in bars?
You can meet a person just about anywhere but the catch is they may not be looking to meet anyone at the same time you are. Do you approach anyone or stand back and observe and then lament your lack of success?
Yes, I have seen it and been part of it. It helps if you have a person in your group who is that kind of personality that brings others into the conversation.
Like a gregarious, funny person who makes eye contact with others and asks questions, or notices something and comments about it. You have to be open and friendly, or it won't work.
Then once the groups start to co-mingle, you get an idea of whether there is someone in that group who might be interesting.
I'm sure some people have. The only time I met someone at a bar was when I went to a social event for a group, and met someone in the group I hadn't known previously. That led to a 5 year long FWB.
To answer Liberty2011's question I have tried about all strategies over the years. If I go alone, I move around a bit in the bar or stand in a high traffic place, and try to spark up a conversation with women I find attractive and who aren't obviously with a guy, especially those who give me good body language signals and eye contact.
BirdieBelle: I am 35 and don't have single friends, so when I go to a bar I usually go alone, which, may or may not seem weird or pathetic. I am sure women are a bit scared of the guy who is not part of group, even though she may be attracted to him. I prefer to not go alone and I do remember women being a bit more receptive when that was the case.
I wouldn't try it today, but I met my wife in a bar when we were both divorced. Each of us expected friends to join us that evening but they never showed. Twenty six years later we are still together.
Yes. I think if you have the intention of meeting someone, weekend nights aren't a good time because of it being packed, like you said. But with that being said, I have met people on weekend nights without intending to. People are generally pretty friendly. Sometimes I'll tell somebody something they didn't notice and they'll appreciate it and start talking to me. I have also made a really good friend just by asking what he was eating. I've never actually dated someone from a bar though and don't care to.
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