Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I have ran into more than a few women, online and in real life, who brag about being bossy as if this makes them more desirable for relationships. Why do these women expect to find a man that will want to stay with them? They actually expect guys to let them walk all over them and not say anything back and when a guy says he doesn’t like her being bossy she will justify it as being a part of her personality and say she can’t help it. I have never heard a woman get put down for being bossy
Why have we had a rash of threads like this, recently?
Nobody said it's ok, OP, except those particular women. It's not ok. Does that answer your question?
I have a fairly low tolerance in general with anybody being "bossy" with me...not just in relationships (though this has rarely, if ever, come up, because I tend to not get too deeply involved with people who have this communication style, by choice). Even supervisors I've had, I tend to work best with them when they have a more collaborative approach, versus a top-heavy, "bossy" approach.
In general, I don't find you to be necessarily any "stronger" if you are a person who throws your weight around, takes charge, grabs the reins, acts generally high-handed, etc. I might find you to be more annoying, but not stronger. I overall do well with people whose leadership style is much less authoritarian.
I cringe at being referred to as "the boss" in a relationship. I want my partner to be happy with our relationship with a minimal amount of you have to do x, y or z to "make" me happy.
Basically, there's very little beyond loyalty and monogamy and honesty I need from my partner to "make" me happy.
If someone demands a great deal that is beyond your capacity to give, it's quite possible they're not the partner for you. If it isn't freely given (with a bit of communication about what your needs are), why stay and make that person miserable meeting demands only grudgingly?
Relationships where there's some dominant "boss" may work for some people, but, eh, not me. A partnership is where it's at. Nobody's the sole large and in charge person.
oh jeez....can we (meaning you) just stop making [bleep] up to complain about? At least say it is YOUR experience - that's far from it being the typical experience of others. Maybe you need to find a good match for yourself.
Fair enough. But why is it when you open the door, point, and ask a man to leave, he locks himself in bathroom, takes a half hour shower, the pees on your wall, and grabs a beer out of the fridge before he leaves?!
I thought it was a newer saying, and in my experience it is used the the context of "you better do what your wife says or you'll be miserable". I've always thought it was a misleading phrase because I don't know many couples with unhappy husbands that ultimately end well any more than couples with unhappy wives do. Men who say it tend to be tools in my experience.
Comes up at work among coworkers as well. My assessment is the same as yours.. I hate those cliches that imply that the happiness of the relationship or house rests on one person.
I can be a tool at times.. I'll admit that... Sometimes to avoid conflict until I have had enough and put my foot down So avoid those types of dynamics as best as I can. A woman can be strong and independent without being bossy. A man can be the same withiut being a jerk. Respect is a two way street
Okay, the concept of "happy wife, happy life" dates back to time in memorial. One example of this is a Cherokee creation story, where the Creator makes First Man and First Woman. First man wasn't very nice to First Woman, and finally she decided she had had enough of his stuff, and took off.
At first, First Man didn't really care, but then he got lonely for her company, and asked the Creator to slow her down so he could catch up to her. The creator started putting berries in her path, which she noticed, but didn't accomplish the goal of slowing her down, until he put the strawberry growing in her path.
It was a pretty berry, and when she tasted it, it was sweet and juicy. It stopped her and allowed First Man to catch up to her. She offers him some of the berries, and he enjoys them too. From that moment forward, the strawberry became a symbol to remind us to be good to one another.
It's not about one catering to the other, it's about being good to one another. When it comes to being good to one another, women often get the crappy end of the stick. You can debate that if you want, but if you look at domestic violence statistics, you will see that that is not a false assessment.
As far as being a word meaning 'female dog', Ive heard it a lot. I think, much like a man being called a dog, its something people say without really considering what it truly means. It sounds good to them, and that's about as far as the thought process takes them.
Okay, the concept of "happy wife, happy life" dates back to time in memorial. One example of this is a Cherokee creation story, where the Creator makes First Man and First Woman. First man wasn't very nice to First Woman, and finally she decided she had had enough of his stuff, and took off.
At first, First Man didn't really care, but then he got lonely for her company, and asked the Creator to slow her down so he could catch up to her. The creator started putting berries in her path, which she noticed, but didn't accomplish the goal of slowing her down, until he put the strawberry growing in her path.
It was a pretty berry, and when she tasted it, it was sweet and juicy. It stopped her and allowed First Man to catch up to her. She offers him some of the berries, and he enjoys them too. From that moment forward, the strawberry became a symbol to remind us to be good to one another.
It's not about one catering to the other, it's about being good to one another. When it comes to being good to one another, women often get the crappy end of the stick. You can debate that if you want, but if you look at domestic violence statistics, you will see that that is not a false assessment.
That's a nice story but I think the saying has evolved, or perhaps devolved, over the years. When I hear it nowadays it is usually in the context of a husband and wife who want two different things and the husband giving in to what the wife wants because "happy wife happy life". There's no implication that the husband is usually a jerk and is seeing the error of his ways or anything like that. It's just a wife who has to get her way so she doesn't make the husband's life miserable. What you and JerZ describe may indeed have been the origin of the saying and then modern culture got its grubby hands on it and distorted it.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
