Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
First, you cant control your husband, he is not property or a puppet. Your husband has to be given an ultimatum, the pen pal or you. I am sure he would not like for you to have the same thing going on. Remind him that you are his wife, he needs to respect you, and having this pen pal is ruining your marriage. Its not respectful.
I am sure there is a tug of war going on for man freedom, and he deserves it, but he does need to act right. Find a balance. If he cant leave it alone, maybe you need to move out for a few weeks, if you have a place, and let him decide what to do. A marriage is a bond between 2, where you share the same bank account/pot of gold. It is a business! The 2 need to trust each other and respect the relationship/business. There are boundaries that you wont cross so you don't offend.
You 2 need marriage counseling. Dont be embarrassed. Counseling will help you understand each other, and give you some tools to use for a better marriage. It does work. Do not seek advice from your friends, as they will only be on your side. Your friends are not trained in figuring out problems. No one gets training on how to make a marriage work .
The relationship is really inappropriate. It’s a breeding ground for infidelity. When one thing goes wrong in the marriage, he will make a bee line for her.
But on the other hand, I’ve always been a firm believer in live and let live. Whatever is going to happen, is gonna happen. He knows it makes you feel uncomfortable, but he doesn’t seem to care.
You either have bounderies in a relationship, or you don't. My ex- wife, even though she swore nothing ever happened, couldn't set bounderies. So guy "friends" were always sniffing around. Which is why she is an ex.
This. This, more than anything else, can be an indicator of there being a problem, but until OP actually expounds on her husband's relationship with this woman, there's no way to know if there is one.
The relationship is really inappropriate. It’s a breeding ground for infidelity. When one thing goes wrong in the marriage, he will make a bee line for her.
But on the other hand, I’ve always been a firm believer in live and let live. Whatever is going to happen, is gonna happen. He knows it makes you feel uncomfortable, but he doesn’t seem to care.
bingo and why would someone stay with someone who does not care about them ? time to leave .
.
I spoke to my husband and we had a conversation about everything. It was nice to get it all off my chest, and he listened to what I had to say and i listened to what he had to say. We agreed on a compromise and are working on rebuilding the trust we have for eachother. It may be a long road, but id rather work this out over throwing it away. Thank you everyone for all your comments and feedback
Despite C_D/R and the usual 'dump him' advice,Yeah, at least one relationship that wasn't destroyed.
Well maybe youre right. Its just a shame that didnt realise you had this much spare time to start with. I know who to come to next time I have any problems
The whole "you've got a lot of time on your hands to post this much on a forum" trope is extremely tired. Keep that in mind next time you want to get in your passive aggressive mode because someone wrote something that didn't agree with you on C-D or elsewhere.
First, you cant control your husband, he is not property or a puppet. Your husband has to be given an ultimatum, the pen pal or you.
Uh...
Quote:
Originally Posted by phonelady61
Only in your world maybe ....
Only in my world...what? You're quoting a response to a post that said that it's weird that he has this kind of attachment to someone who lives an ocean away and whom he has met in person once. I happen to agree. So...it's only weird in my world?
Last edited by highlanderfil; 02-20-2018 at 07:07 AM..
The relationship is really inappropriate. It’s a breeding ground for infidelity. When one thing goes wrong in the marriage, he will make a bee line for her.
Counterpoint: no it's not, no it's not and no he won't.
I must say, I'm admiring the readiness with which a lot of people have exposed their own insecurities in this thread.
Quote:
Originally Posted by old_cold
Despite C_D/R and the usual 'dump him' advice,Yeah, at least one relationship that wasn't destroyed.
So, as a relative newbie to this section of C-D, I must ask - is this the default go-to response here for even the slightest issue? I wonder just how ready these people are to act on their own advice if that's the case.
Last edited by highlanderfil; 02-20-2018 at 07:11 AM..
I must ask - is this the default go-to response here for even the slightest issue?
No, it's not.
As a noob here it would benefit you to review the TOS specific to this subforum.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
