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So...you took a lady out to dinner...on Valentine's Day...to a restaurant that offers pricey items like surf n' turf...and you're upset she chose a pricey item...on a day that is well known to be a "special occasion"?
But most women aren't gold diggers right? those guys who complain that Most woman only want guys who make good money are completely wrong right?
Funny how the word cheapskate is the biggest insult that can get hurled at a guy.
Cheapskate as in the intent is to come off as somebody with substance, money but to not actually spend any (or much). Seriously, there is a world of difference between having a cheap date, which is perfectly acceptable, and being a cheapskate, which is not.
You might want to try a date that does not involve eating heavy foods and actually doing something interesting. In my opinion, it is a lot more fun that sitting in the restaurant. Especially on a weekday after sitting all day in the office...
That assumes I'm the one requesting food. If my date wants something to eat (and, eventually they always have, even if the date didn't start out that way) I'm not going to tell him, "no, you cant!"
I'm usually very good at just saying okay. "How about we go for pizza?" "Ok." "I'm hungry. How about a burger?" "Ok." Sometimes I can get through several hours with someone merely giggling and saying, "Ok."
If I were OP, I would invite the date to an exotic restaurant, i.e. Vietnamese or Korean or Thai, to save money.
In doing so, the OP could:
(1) Demonstrate that he is very cosmopolitan and has some interesting topics to start for chat, i.e. foreign food. And very likely the date would have less knowledge about exotic food and let OP order on behalf of her.
(2) Most likely the tab for all the above exotic restaurants, including appetizer and entree, will be below $20/person. Egg roll + Pho, Papaya salad + Pad Thai, Sundubu + Kalbi,...etc. should be all within the budget.
But just remember don't take your date to any Japanese restaurant.
Cheapskate as in the intent is to come off as somebody with substance, money but to not actually spend any (or much). Seriously, there is a world of difference between having a cheap date, which is perfectly acceptable, and being a cheapskate, which is not.
Exactly.
"Cheapskate" is a description of an attitude.
Just as "gold digger" is a description of an attitude whether it's a $50 lobster plate, the most expensive coffee at Starbucks, or wanting the large-size popcorn plus two drinks at the movie, or asking for a diamond necklace but only giving cubic zirconium "in return"...or whatever.
It's not the amount of money that's the point here, and surely those insisting it is the idea of ordering the most expensive item (presumably??) on the menu - no matter what the actual cost is - that is making this "date" apparently unsavory, not the actual money amount.
Same thing with "cheapskate." If I make $10/hour but refuse a ten-cent tip at a coffee house, I'm a cheapskate. If I make $200K/year and demand my children wear torn, old clothing, I'm a cheapskate...but if all I can afford are thrift shops, and the super bargain-basement ones at that, I'm NOT a cheapskate for dressing my children in clothes from those places.
Pretty straightforward concept.
FTR, how fascinating that those being the loudest about how money is important to women in the "ordering food" scenarios, are the people who are actually calculating every possible exact penny in the scenarios, and keeping a mental score card. Even down to saying they don't care about the actual amount but that she should choose specifically in a certain space on the menu where they (the judgers) have deduced the highest priced items are. It is that specific...yet it's the woman who's into money. 'Cause stupidly, she didn't conform to some dating rule about ordering from the center of the menu, or ordering a salad. On Valentine's Day. Which the OP himself asked to have the date on.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ian_Lee
After devouring $100 worth of Sushi, the date might be still hungry.
There are plenty of other things to eat at Japanese restaurants other than sushi, and I'm a fairly big guy, and have certainly never eaten $100 in sushi. It would have to be a pretty high end place to pull that off.
In case they have bluefin sashimi or kobe beef on the menu...
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