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I didn't say you used numbers..I don't usually use numbers either i was using it this time with 1's 2's and 10's to use examples that most people aren't hideous nor models..
If youve said people should go after people of similliar attraction level what difference does it make that you didn't use numbers?
Maybe using numbers is a little more harsh but it's the same point you're arguing semantics here.
Nope.
Again, please show me where I said what you say I am saying. We can then take it in context - what was this even about? Was it on the tail end of a conversation already talking about attraction levels, attractiveness and so on?
As far as using the word "league", that's what I said. FAR more men than women initiate these conversations here. Indeed, conversations on looks in general.
You can do the search yourself, go to Advanced Search, "league," Title Only, Relationships Forum (or else you'll get a lot of stuff about baseball and so on).
I took a screenshot, I am very frustrated as it won't upload. See for yourself. The first 12 results (as that's what fit in my Nimbus), every single one, male. No leaning of keywords, literally just the keyword league.
We are friggin' answering one right now, for God's sake.
Leagues are only rough measurements of a person on a scale of conventional attractiveness. Women typically aren't the initiators, so all they need to think about is whether they're attracted to the suitor or not. Whether they attach numbers factoring in a man's physical attributes doesn't even matter anyway - the end result is the same. Also, men's minds tend to be rooted more in logic and statistics, so it would make sense they would think about it and mention leagues more.
This may sound bizarre or even silly but this is what Im seeing lately. It is almost like I am in this weird spot where there isnt anyone suitable for me.
Yeah, I know some will say that that would be impossible and that there are plenty of women that are "my level". And I would agree that indeed there are. The only problem being that.. they are all taken.
It is almost as if the average people like myself are much, much more likely to couple up and stay that way making it that much more difficult for the remaining "average" people to find each other. What you do have prevalent in the single world is the outliers, ie people that are either very attractive or the ones who have very little going for them in terms of looks/body type/personality etc.
These are of course just my observations based on what I see around my workplace and immediate surroundings, but I do wonder if anyone thinks this idea has some merit to it.
Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve
yep, I am right there with you.
Maybe it is the time of the year? I've contacted about 10 guys online in the past two weeks and only one responded for a little while. These were all guys where I thought they are in my league - somewhat in shape, hair, okay job, normal pictures. None of them was a model/dr./millionaire/topnotch big shot.
Well there you are. You two couple up and enjoy yourselves.
Leagues are only rough measurements of a person on a scale of conventional attractiveness. Women typically aren't the initiators, so all they need to think about is whether they're attracted to the suitor or not. Whether they attach numbers factoring in a man's physical attributes doesn't even matter anyway - the end result is the same. Also, men's minds tend to be rooted more in logic and statistics, so it would make sense they would think about it and mention leagues more.
Sure.
And what I was refuting was one poster saying it is women who do it much more.
We don't, LOL. Certainly not on here, which was what I was speaking of (apparently we're not "allowed" to give our own real-world experiences anymore or it's "all about us" and yadda yadda...or whiskadoo). A simple search shows that.
Done is all? I've been in that stiuation before and the truth is I simply forgot to message her back. Too much on the plate. Had she sent a reminder I probably would have found the time to drop a line. Seems to me people just aren't constructive for whatever reasons.
Well, that's typically the exception and not the rule. But it does happen.
Life is full of leagues. Economic class, races, attractiveness. Find where you fit and stay in your own lane.
Yikes
I’m not even gonna get into the race or economics part of this, since that isn’t part of the discussion, but I totally don’t like your “Stay in your own lane” comment.
If I were to “Stay in my own lane” as far as attractiveness goes, I would have kept telling my story to myself that I’m not worthy enough to go out with a woman, who is as beautiful as my soon-to-be wife, because there’s a lot of people who might say that I drifted over into the other lane and sideswiped her, as I think she’s much more beautiful than what most would categorize as my league. And I actually have a healthy self esteem.
If everyone thought like this, there wouldn’t be so many couples where one party would be generally seen as more attractive in looks to the other. I’m sad to see that many people tell themselves that story though, and think they have to settle for some concept of a particular league that they fit in and that they need to stay in that league.
Life is full of leagues. Economic class, races, attractiveness. Find where you fit and stay in your own lane.
Why? I never did want to date my opposite gender clone. Life is more interesting with some differences.
While I probably wouldn't date someone living in a box under a freeway underpass, money isn't a huge deal to me.
Looks aren't a huge deal. Once I start falling for someone, they become more attractive in my eyes. One short bald and slightly chubby guy I (unenthusiastically) agreed to meet had something compelling about him that led to more dates. (If I hadn't met and started dating current SO around the same time, he and I might still be together, but I don't have it in me to date multiple people when things get physical).
I've always been open to dating outside my race.
My finances are complicated... but I am better off than most.
No, I don't believe in arbitrarily closing myself off to people based on essentially superficial criteria.
Location: Born in L.A. - NYC is Second Home - Rustbelt is Home Base
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OP...throw a widener lasso, possibly out of state. You will find someone that is right.
If you get discouraged, don't worry, you can always go gay!
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We can then take it in context - what was this even about? Was it on the tail end of a conversation already talking about attraction levels, attractiveness and so on?
