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I think a goodly part is that for the first time they are meeting a woman who is quite open about enjoying sex thus they consider her hot...hot. The young men are having the best sex of their life. Most younger women have not discovered themselves yet and are still a bit uptight about sex.
I agree, at least in a way.
I've actually reached a point where I believe that less experienced men, and more experienced women, are potentially better lovers.
The less experienced man does not have a bunch of habits he learned from whatever he was doing with other women, he's ready to learn what I like (as his potential partner) rather than just getting down like he always has, and assuming he's getting the job done. As long as he's got an open mind and he's not full of weird hangups and fears about various activities. And he's grateful to have the chance. It's nice to feel appreciated.
When I was a less experienced woman, I was easily squicked out by all sorts of things, and there were very few activities and positions I wanted to do in bed. If it was even a little bit "ouch" or "ew" then it was a great big NOPE, even if there are in fact ways to do a given act right, that make it enjoyable. I didn't even want to try. I am far, far more adventurous since about my mid-30's.
However, I prefer older men...so I found what I consider to be a magical combination, an older man who was inexperienced. Other women might wonder what is wrong with him, I'm getting to enjoy what is RIGHT with him, which it turns out, is pretty much everything. Both of us are having a great time.
RJ312:
Regarding your comment that women were happier before we entered the workforce: I think that probably the biggest driver of this unhappiness, which I would not argue that statistic, is that it isn't one or the other. Women did not transition from being housewives, to being part of the workforce in a similar capacity that men are, women transitioned from doing one job, to doing two jobs, plenty often. I talk to tons of women who are upset that they "always have to be the adult." The current economy (since women entered the workforce, and a household had more potential income, everything then cost more) means that it's likely they HAVE to work, to make enough for whatever lifestyle they want to live. But if they also want a clean home, they often have to do most of the work, because there's a good chance that their husband won't. And they also take most of the parenting responsibilities, still, too. They don't get time "off."
There's a thing that has always left me frustrated... My employer expects me to conduct myself as though there is no greater priority in my life than my job. My kids are supposed to come first. Their school acts as though how DARE I not be sitting home waiting for a call to come drop off their lunch or pick them up or chaperone a field trip or join the PTA...their school life should be a high priority to me! Then there was my husband, who wanted to be a high priority, too. And people were on my backside about not going back to school to get a degree, there's yet another thing that was supposed to be important, and if you listen to some voices, you'll also get to hear, "You need to make time for yourself, you're no good to anyone if you don't take care of you!" Like...when? On "my own time?" What time? There is none. And I had better have dinner on the table, and keep up with the laundry, and not let the dishes sit, and so on. And how will I feel if I have a partner who figures he goes to work, and earns a paycheck, and should then get to come home and put his feet up, and I should be a comfort to him, tending to his needs...???
The life of an "unhappy" modern woman in the present day working world is a simple matter of having too much on her plate.
The solution, is that a man had better be prepared to either earn enough so she can stay at home, or help with the household and parenting responsibilities. If he won't do one of those things, he should expect to eventually lose his wife.
The life of an "unhappy" modern woman in the present day working world is a simple matter of having too much on her plate.
The solution, is that a man had better be prepared to either earn enough so she can stay at home, or help with the household and parenting responsibilities. If he won't do one of those things, he should expect to eventually lose his wife.
Yes.
This is so, so common.
We can only do so much. Yet so many women both work outside the home (or work from home), and care for the inside of the home and take the larger portion of the care of the children as well. This is documented but I won't bore anyone with it.
I have faith that with new generations this will begin to change. I hope so, because if people complain about divorce stats, maybe they should be working to keep resentments down. Resentment is corrosive and eats away at even an initially good relationship.
I find those who snark the loudest about how women have "dug their own grave," so to speak, "with feminism," are the ones most likely to encourage this "punishment" (oh, you wanna work outside the home and be independent? Well, see how much you like doing all the 'woman stuff' in the house PLUS office work, serves you right). Or to comment to that effect if they're not in a relationship.
Regarding your comment that women were happier before we entered the workforce: I think that probably the biggest driver of this unhappiness, which I would not argue that statistic, is that it isn't one or the other. Women did not transition from being housewives, to being part of the workforce in a similar capacity that men are, women transitioned from doing one job, to doing two jobs, plenty often. I talk to tons of women who are upset that they "always have to be the adult." The current economy (since women entered the workforce, and a household had more potential income, everything then cost more) means that it's likely they HAVE to work, to make enough for whatever lifestyle they want to live. But if they also want a clean home, they often have to do most of the work, because there's a good chance that their husband won't. And they also take most of the parenting responsibilities, still, too. They don't get time "off."
There's a thing that has always left me frustrated... My employer expects me to conduct myself as though there is no greater priority in my life than my job. My kids are supposed to come first. Their school acts as though how DARE I not be sitting home waiting for a call to come drop off their lunch or pick them up or chaperone a field trip or join the PTA...their school life should be a high priority to me! Then there was my husband, who wanted to be a high priority, too. And people were on my backside about not going back to school to get a degree, there's yet another thing that was supposed to be important, and if you listen to some voices, you'll also get to hear, "You need to make time for yourself, you're no good to anyone if you don't take care of you!" Like...when? On "my own time?" What time? There is none. And I had better have dinner on the table, and keep up with the laundry, and not let the dishes sit, and so on. And how will I feel if I have a partner who figures he goes to work, and earns a paycheck, and should then get to come home and put his feet up, and I should be a comfort to him, tending to his needs...???
The life of an "unhappy" modern woman in the present day working world is a simple matter of having too much on her plate.
The solution, is that a man had better be prepared to either earn enough so she can stay at home, or help with the household and parenting responsibilities. If he won't do one of those things, he should expect to eventually lose his wife.
You have some legitimate points there and some empathy is deserved there. However, remember that it's not just women alone that have too much on their plate.
I've never married. At a previous job, I was being pushed by mid and upper level managers to work more hours. The managers that were pushing me to work more hours were all married men with stay-at-home wives. I was the sole breadwinner of my household, and I had all the responsibility of running a household, as well as finding dates and foster the development of young relationships. I had more on my plate than those managers could understand.
I've actually reached a point where I believe that less experienced men, and more experienced women, are potentially better lovers.
The less experienced man does not have a bunch of habits he learned from whatever he was doing with other women, he's ready to learn what I like (as his potential partner) rather than just getting down like he always has, and assuming he's getting the job done. As long as he's got an open mind and he's not full of weird hangups and fears about various activities. And he's grateful to have the chance. It's nice to feel appreciated.
When I was a less experienced woman, I was easily squicked out by all sorts of things, and there were very few activities and positions I wanted to do in bed. If it was even a little bit "ouch" or "ew" then it was a great big NOPE, even if there are in fact ways to do a given act right, that make it enjoyable. I didn't even want to try. I am far, far more adventurous since about my mid-30's.
However, I prefer older men...so I found what I consider to be a magical combination, an older man who was inexperienced. Other women might wonder what is wrong with him, I'm getting to enjoy what is RIGHT with him, which it turns out, is pretty much everything. Both of us are having a great time.
RJ312:
Regarding your comment that women were happier before we entered the workforce: I think that probably the biggest driver of this unhappiness, which I would not argue that statistic, is that it isn't one or the other. Women did not transition from being housewives, to being part of the workforce in a similar capacity that men are, women transitioned from doing one job, to doing two jobs, plenty often. I talk to tons of women who are upset that they "always have to be the adult." The current economy (since women entered the workforce, and a household had more potential income, everything then cost more) means that it's likely they HAVE to work, to make enough for whatever lifestyle they want to live. But if they also want a clean home, they often have to do most of the work, because there's a good chance that their husband won't. And they also take most of the parenting responsibilities, still, too. They don't get time "off."
There's a thing that has always left me frustrated... My employer expects me to conduct myself as though there is no greater priority in my life than my job. My kids are supposed to come first. Their school acts as though how DARE I not be sitting home waiting for a call to come drop off their lunch or pick them up or chaperone a field trip or join the PTA...their school life should be a high priority to me! Then there was my husband, who wanted to be a high priority, too. And people were on my backside about not going back to school to get a degree, there's yet another thing that was supposed to be important, and if you listen to some voices, you'll also get to hear, "You need to make time for yourself, you're no good to anyone if you don't take care of you!" Like...when? On "my own time?" What time? There is none. And I had better have dinner on the table, and keep up with the laundry, and not let the dishes sit, and so on. And how will I feel if I have a partner who figures he goes to work, and earns a paycheck, and should then get to come home and put his feet up, and I should be a comfort to him, tending to his needs...???
The life of an "unhappy" modern woman in the present day working world is a simple matter of having too much on her plate.
The solution, is that a man had better be prepared to either earn enough so she can stay at home, or help with the household and parenting responsibilities. If he won't do one of those things, he should expect to eventually lose his wife.
I think a lot of this can be traced back to the fact that a lot of boys are not taught to do these things when they are young, often mommy does everything for him and when he grows up he is unable and/or unwilling to do these things. When my parents divorced, my mother worked into the evening and I did the cooking for my younger sister and I. I also did laundry, ironed clothes cleaned bathrooms, vacuuming, etc. I did this all when I was 12, so none of it was foreign to me. Of course, then you have the "traditionalists" who feel that men doing these things is "unmanly" and men should only be fixing/building things and doing car care (I see many posts on this forum stating this). I look at my nephews (13 and 11) and neither one of them does their own laundry or can make anything except a PB and J sandwich. If you really want to see changes in this, it needs to be taught at an early age, not when a guy is in his twenties.
I think a lot of this can be traced back to the fact that a lot of boys are not taught to do these things when they are young, often mommy does everything for him and when he grows up he is unable and/or unwilling to do these things. When my parents divorced, my mother worked into the evening and I did the cooking for my younger sister and I. I also did laundry, ironed clothes cleaned bathrooms, vacuuming, etc. I did this all when I was 12, so none of it was foreign to me. Of course, then you have the "traditionalists" who feel that men doing these things is "unmanly" and men should only be fixing/building things and doing car care (I see many posts on this forum stating this). I look at my nephews (13 and 11) and neither one of them does their own laundry or can make anything except a PB and J sandwich. If you really want to see changes in this, it needs to be taught at an early age, not when a guy is in his twenties.
We should not be teaching males home economics. I'd rather see males being taught shop classes, hunting, and fishing. I also don't think young females are domesticated enough. We should teach young women this stuff.
As a never married male, I've had to learn how to cook nutritious meals, how to grocery shop & plan meals, how to clean, & how to do laundry. My preference would be for a woman to do these things for me. I don't need it though since I can fend for myself in these activities. Some men marrywomen now that are poor homemakers.
We should not be teaching males home economics. I'd rather see males being taught shop classes, hunting, and fishing. I also don't think young females are domesticated enough. We should teach young women this stuff.
As a never married male, I've had to learn how to cook nutritious meals, how to grocery shop & plan meals, how to clean, & how to do laundry. My preference would be for a woman to do these things for me. I don't need it though since I can fend for myself in these activities. Some men marrywomen now that are poor homemakers.
We should not be teaching males home economics. I'd rather see males being taught shop classes, hunting, and fishing. I also don't think young females are domesticated enough. We should teach young women this stuff.
And if you ask me, TV has gone to the dogs since it went color.
Yeah, I agree. That's absolutely outrageous! I think you should sue for wages not rendered.
Right? Loss of wages not rendered and alienation of affection! Use the punitive damages to buy a foreign woman.
Maybe Cordell and Cordell will take on this case. "A partners men can finally count on."
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