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I can't stand it. It's such a nasty habit. He's tried stopping tons of times, but it never works. It's such a turn off kissing him. It's like kissing an ashtray. YUK! What do I do?
You shouldn't have married him. At this point in my life, cigarette smoking is a big deal breaker for me. I won't even flirt with a guy that smokes. And right now, none of my friends are smokers.
Has he tried the nicotine patch yet? Hypnosis helps some too.
Does he really want to quit or was he trying to quit because he knows you hate his smoking? It really comes down to if he wants to stop for himself, not another person. I'm not saying you're not important to him. Willpower has to be there. In my case..I just quit from one day to the next, after smoking 27 years, I made up my mind and didn't worry about withdrawal symptoms. The more you worry, the less strenght you have left to stick with it. I believe alot of withdrawal is in the mind, not exactly that you're imagining it but once you can convince yourself that you're OK without the nicotine, it'll work.... Just like anything else you put your mind to.. Most do have to try quitting a few times.
I can't stand the smell now either but at one point I smoked two packs per day...strange really how things change. Having said all this, it is a very strong addiction, not to be underestimated.
But this is just my opinion.
I can't stand it. It's such a nasty habit. He's tried stopping tons of times, but it never works. It's such a turn off kissing him. It's like kissing an ashtray. YUK! What do I do?
He-he, I think the reason I started smoking might've been kissing an ashtray. It was a quite yummy ashtray!
I guess it's the best for us ashtrays to be with other ashtrays.
I've got a coworker who recently got married to somebody with your attitude. She said she was quitting right at the wedding because she decided so... Yeah, right, as if anybody believed it. So at this time she's only an office smoker. Goes out for one as soon as she comes in...as if she gets out of prison (well, prison it is IMO). At home the policy is "don't ask, don't tell". You're a grown-up, woman! Get a grip of yourself! As far as I'm concerned, if somebody can't deal with the whole package that I am, he can have a happy life on his own.
I can't stand it. It's such a nasty habit. He's tried stopping tons of times, but it never works. It's such a turn off kissing him. It's like kissing an ashtray. YUK! What do I do?
Sounds like you are not supportive of him. I doubt he started after you was married and now you are wanting to change who he is and the addictions that he has.
A supportive lover would be understanding of his addiction and try to get the best treatment if it comes to you marriage.
He should try Chantix if it recommended by a doctor but it does not sound like you are going to be a good person to be around while this drug is doing its thing. It requires a positive emotional support team.
For the mean time he should either brush his teeth, or use mouthwash before kissing you. I also recommend fresh clothes and washed hands for a temporary solution to the smell.
^Hmm.
Sounds to me like she isn't being supportive of his smoking. And that's a good thing. I don't want people I love smoking either. I see nothing in her post that would lead me to believe she wouldn't offer her full support of any quitting attempts he might make. And it doesn't sound at all like she's trying to "change who he is" -- just that she'd like him to quit smoking.
It sounds to me like she's doing okay. Maybe just keep letting him know you're not okay with his smoking, but I wouldn't constantly nag about it either. If he decides to make an effort to quit, support it and encourage him. Obviously.
Gosh, ya know more and more people are harping on smokers, yet the ones who do harp either drink too much, drink and drive, have bad eating habits and still think they are superior over a person who smokes. No one is perfect, but if the person with the bad habit feels it isn't bad, they will not change. I would suggest taking some short health classes through the American Heart & Lung Assoc., Red Cross or other organization in your area. Being over weight is a health risk, Alcohol consumption in excess is a health risk, lack of exercise is a health risk. Take care of yourselves and encourage those you love to as well.
I love my husband and yes he did smoke when we got married. I don't think that should be the decision whether or not to be with someone. I am supportive of him quiting. He tried Chantix and it worked for a little bit, but after 2 months he stopped using it b/c he said it made him nauseous. I was trying to find a way to approach him not to do it before we plan on being close.
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