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A relationship is not going to be great every hour of every day but one should not make you miserable or insecure all the time. While you may have gone to therapy for previous issues, this is a new one and having a new baby in the mix who relies on your makes it even more important to get help. If your previous relationship was abusive like you specified above, maybe the first place to start is to focus on what you can control - your self worth and self esteem. When you start seeing that you deserve more, you will be more proactive about making sure that you surround yourself with people who give you more. Are you parents supportive of you? If so, even if you don't always see eye to eye, they are still there in your court.
A relationship is not going to be great every hour of every day but one should not make you miserable or insecure all the time. While you may have gone to therapy for previous issues, this is a new one and having a new baby in the mix who relies on your makes it even more important to get help. If your previous relationship was abusive like you specified above, maybe the first place to start is to focus on what you can control - your self worth and self esteem. When you start seeing that you deserve more, you will be more proactive about making sure that you surround yourself with people who give you more. Are you parents supportive of you? If so, even if you don't always see eye to eye, they are still there in your court.
They are very supportive. My parents help me a lot but I don't want them to give too much cause they would. I just dont think I'm worth going to therapy and spending that money and time.
If you have doubt about marrying him, don't marry him yet. You two can co-parent without getting married. You should get professional help soon, and it's worth the money to do so. Do it not just for yourself, for your kid too!
They are very supportive. My parents help me a lot but I don't want them to give too much cause they would. I just dont think I'm worth going to therapy and spending that money and time.
That's the problem. You don't think you are worth it so why should anyone else? There are therapists that work on sliding scale and very low cost out there. Also there are therapists that work in the evenings. There are even therapists that you can reach out to via telephone and text. You are worth it and until you start believing that you will continue to be treated poorly.
"Willing to help"? It's a 6-week old infant, not a plant that needs watering. You mentioned that your mother works full-time. It just seems sort of....odd that the literal care and feeding of this baby hasn't been sorted.
I havent gone back to work yet. I go back next week.
He should not be your fiance.
You two need to separate, finish growing up, and learn about co-parenting. He needs to understand that he is a father, not a fill-in helper.
Your goal should be independence. You need to choose a goal such as a vehicle or a place to live on your own, if it is affordable in your area.
Your baby may have been unplanned, but she is the factor around which ALL other decisions must be made from now on. And your romantic relationship with her father, such as it is, is not a priority right now.
Break it off with him and move forward on your own for now. Please continue therapy of some kind, with a new therapist. You are not just responsible for you now.
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