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A woman won't have an aversion to calling a date a "date" if she likes you or has any interest in getting to know you.
That's just not always true.
I have two sons in their early 20s, and they both think this way about "dating."
There is something about semantics that matters. No one calls it a date or even "going out." They just "hang out" until somehow they end up with a girl. It's all VERY indirect and almost accidental. The way they and their friends go about it drives me CRAZY, but they call any suggestion I make about directly contacting someone you're interested in "creepy."
Since it is not a date and just to hang out with a group of friends, she is welcome to take a shine to one of your buddies, who is also hanging out on the group not-a-date and to start up a relationship with him. I hope he thanks you later.
It seems to me that asking a woman to just hang out with a group of friends is a good way to friend zone yourself.
I wouldn't mind a group date for everybody to get together and do something fun, but if you want her to be your date, you'd best make it clear that you are asking her to be your date, and then you had better treat her like she is your date, giving her plenty of your attention and making sure she is doing ok, has a.drink, someone to talk to, whatever.
I have two sons in their early 20s, and they both think this way about "dating."
There is something about semantics that matters. No one calls it a date or even "going out." They just "hang out" until somehow they end up with a girl. It's all VERY indirect and almost accidental. The way they and their friends go about it drives me CRAZY, but they call any suggestion I make about directly contacting someone you're interested in "creepy."
For very young people, sure. I remember this from high school and that was in the 80s. College kids seem to do this more too.
But when we became “grownups” we called it a date...if we wanted it to be an actual date.
I don't normally use the word "date" when asking someone out, but I make it clear that it will just be the two of us doing something together and that I want to go out specifically with her.
Hopefully that's sufficiently clear, though in a recent case it definitely wasn't. Not sure if that was a one-off or if I should be more blunt about the purpose of the outing.
Another good one is when you ask a woman out...she puts you in the friend zone with, "As friends?"
The thing is, guys agree to this...but guess what...she doesn't even want to hang out 'as friends" because her "as friends" response would be not to actually hang out with you, and was just translated, "I don't to spend time wiht you in ANY capacity because...well...you attempted to ask me out on a date...so now that I know you have the hots for me, I throw the "as friends" as a smoke screen for, 'I don't want you around in ANY capacity'.".
Some say if you are friend zoned by a woman, well they are like 'One can never have too many friends", and well, they COULD introduce you to their OTHER single female friends...right?
Thing is though, i've known marriages that have stemmed from these beginnings though. Oddly enough...as I'm sure many here can attest to these one-off successes.
If you want a friend, proceed. If you want to be with someone who's into you and gonna act like it, .
Right, as a footnote to add...let's say you ARE okay with being their platonic friend, and say, you try to continue to correspond with them...guess what they actually they never did want to correspond with you, even in a platonic fashion...why? Because they are anticipating you making a romantic move..why? Because you're a man. lol
Even if you DONT plan on making a move, they don't want to risk it, regardless.
I would try to chat with a woman after this is already established, and I'd get brief "Yeah" "Uh-huh", but little or no engagement.
So, it is really a futile situation. So it brings you BACK full circle to just to conclude some women aren't okay with being platonic friends with me...because they don't want the risk later down the road.
Another good one is when you ask a woman out...she puts you in the friend zone with, "As friends?"
The thing is, guys agree to this...but guess what...she doesn't even want to hang out 'as friends" because her "as friends" response would be not to actually hang out with you, and was just translated, "I don't to spend time wiht you in ANY capacity because...well...you attempted to ask me out on a date...so now that I know you have the hots for me, I throw the "as friends" as a smoke screen for, 'I don't want you around in ANY capacity'.".
Some say if you are friend zoned by a woman, well they are like 'One can never have too many friends", and well, they COULD introduce you to their OTHER single female friends...right?
Thing is though, i've known marriages that have stemmed from these beginnings though. Oddly enough...as I'm sure many here can attest to these one-off successes.
It’s not because you asked her out, it’s because she’s not attracted to you!
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