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The words "Dumb" and "Hot" come up a lot. I mean, some of the hot ones were pretty smart and obviously I found the dumb ones attractive... but if we're talking about dominant traits...
Thanks for playing along. I figured most of the words people would come up with would be negative. Either some of you have had a LOT of relationships or you’re not limiting yourself to one word per ex. The idea is not to give it a lot of thought. Just think of the person and say the first word that pops into your head. I did this with a few of my exes. In some cases, I was surprised. One ex was a single parent. But the word mother didn’t immediately pop into my head. Instead, it was religious, probably because that was the biggest reason we didn’t work out. Another ex was bipolar. But funny enough, that word wasn’t the first word I thought of. Instead, it was obese, which left me feeling ashamed since, at the time we were dating, I never had a problem with her weight. Another ex was considerably older than me, but the first word that comes to mind is immature. So it’s interesting how your brain focuses on the qualities that aren’t necessarily the ones you think it should.
Thanks for playing along. I figured most of the words people would come up with would be negative. Either some of you have had a LOT of relationships or you’re not limiting yourself to one word per ex. The idea is not to give it a lot of thought. Just think of the person and say the first word that pops into your head. I did this with a few of my exes. In some cases, I was surprised. One ex was a single parent. But the word mother didn’t immediately pop into my head. Instead, it was religious, probably because that was the biggest reason we didn’t work out. Another ex was bipolar. But funny enough, that word wasn’t the first word I thought of. Instead, it was obese, which left me feeling ashamed since, at the time we were dating, I never had a problem with her weight. Another ex was considerably older than me, but the first word that comes to mind is immature. So it’s interesting how your brain focuses on the qualities that aren’t necessarily the ones you think it should.
Exes are exes for a reason, so I wouldn't think it surprising that most words are negative.
Thanks for playing along. I figured most of the words people would come up with would be negative. Either some of you have had a LOT of relationships or you’re not limiting yourself to one word per ex. The idea is not to give it a lot of thought. Just think of the person and say the first word that pops into your head. I did this with a few of my exes. In some cases, I was surprised. One ex was a single parent. But the word mother didn’t immediately pop into my head. Instead, it was religious, probably because that was the biggest reason we didn’t work out. Another ex was bipolar. But funny enough, that word wasn’t the first word I thought of. Instead, it was obese, which left me feeling ashamed since, at the time we were dating, I never had a problem with her weight. Another ex was considerably older than me, but the first word that comes to mind is immature. So it’s interesting how your brain focuses on the qualities that aren’t necessarily the ones you think it should.
I had many partners, mine was the multicolored (showing fewer women than men) post. The first block was age 14-18, then The Ex (the only former partner I refer to as an "ex") was my husband for 18 years, then the second block is after we parted.
One thing I have realized from having kept the data on my formers, which I do because I keep data on practically everything, I'm a meticulous keeper of lists and spreadsheets and such on everything...is that when I am free and single, and not in a committed relationship, I can average probably 10 partners per year. It's a good thing, I guess, that I haven't been in that state of being for very many years of my life.
I remember most of them in "meh who cares" neither positive nor negative terms, a good, significant number in positive ways, and very few truly negatively. I have wonderful memories of good times with many of them, and remain friends with a number of them still.
So what someone said, and has been repeated here, that people are "exes for a reason"...it isn't always true in my life, at least not in terms of feeling negatively toward them. Many of my relationships didn't end because of some blowup of horribleness. They just ran their course, or it wasn't a good working connection for a long term relationship. I don't cling to non-working connections without a very, very good reason (only the one!) and I don't hate anyone just because they didn't want to be my partner for life. That's just not always in the cards, so what?
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The idea is not to give it a lot of thought. Just think of the person and say the first word that pops into your head. I did this with a few of my exes. In some cases, I was surprised. One ex was a single parent. But the word mother didn’t immediately pop into my head. Instead, it was religious, probably because that was the biggest reason we didn’t work out. Another ex was bipolar. But funny enough, that word wasn’t the first word I thought of. Instead, it was obese, which left me feeling ashamed since, at the time we were dating, I never had a problem with her weight. Another ex was considerably older than me, but the first word that comes to mind is immature. So it’s interesting how your brain focuses on the qualities that aren’t necessarily the ones you think it should.
