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Old 09-28-2018, 06:12 PM
 
Location: Middle of the valley
48,267 posts, read 34,383,908 times
Reputation: 73201

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Quote:
Originally Posted by srjth View Post
I am looking for a nice guy. Really nice. Kind. Sweet. I mean, syrupy sweet. Disgustingly nice. I simply can not be with a man who is not incredibly nice. Like all the time. No anger, no sarcasm, no snippy-ness, no moodiness, no resentment, no fighter, no bitterness, not easily set off, and I don't mean the kind who is good at holding it in or hiding it. Everyone says they are a nice person and easy-going, but that's hyperbole by now, I want a truly nice and easy-going man. I know they exist but I haven't known one in like a decade. (admittedly, I don't have a large sample size to draw from). So I'm wondering how many nice guys exist out there, especially after they get married? I am asking the ladies for information sake.
Yes, and no. Basically, my husband is the above.... to me, but not in general. No one I know would worked with him would describe him as easy going, most think he is kinda a jerk, but he treats me like a queen.

We still butt heads. I'm not an easy going person. But I need someone with a strong personality, or I would walk all over them.

I think everyone's definition is going to vary.
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Old 09-28-2018, 06:17 PM
 
587 posts, read 418,656 times
Reputation: 838
"Nice" guys are "pushovers" right?

I've seen an overly timid/ accommodating/ mild-mannered man & an extremely dominating/ b*tchy wife or companion, and I can't help but feel sorry for the guy.

Usually when one is too nice, they put up with too much s**t

I also think a couple who are both too mild-mannered makes for quite a boring dynamic
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Old 09-28-2018, 06:38 PM
 
733 posts, read 446,551 times
Reputation: 1409
I like the same type of man, but he also has to be smart and strong (mentally) too. My dad is that exact man to my mom, mainly because he truly loves my mom. I don't think there's anything she could have done or said that will make my dad stops loving her. My mom is not exactly an angel :-)
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Old 09-28-2018, 07:41 PM
 
Location: California side of the Sierras
11,162 posts, read 7,586,618 times
Reputation: 12523
Im not married, but my SO is extremely nice, easy going, kind to others, very little gets him riled. That's pretty much why I found him appealing.
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Old 09-28-2018, 07:43 PM
 
Location: California side of the Sierras
11,162 posts, read 7,586,618 times
Reputation: 12523
Quote:
Originally Posted by krosser100 View Post
"Nice" guys are "pushovers" right?

I've seen an overly timid/ accommodating/ mild-mannered man & an extremely dominating/ b*tchy wife or companion, and I can't help but feel sorry for the guy.

Usually when one is too nice, they put up with too much s**t

I also think a couple who are both too mild-mannered makes for quite a boring dynamic
Overly timid is not the same as nice, IMO.
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Old 09-28-2018, 07:56 PM
 
3,852 posts, read 4,126,433 times
Reputation: 7866
My husband is extremely nice and easygoing, but not a pushover. I love that about him!
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Old 09-28-2018, 08:16 PM
 
Location: Richmond VA
6,870 posts, read 7,812,978 times
Reputation: 18193
I don't think that what the OP is looking for can truly exist. If someone is THAT sweet, they've learned to bury negative feelings or manipulate others or aren't able to get their own needs met.

I have a strong sense of justice. I need a man who can stand up for what is right. He can do it quietly and calmly, but has to be able to stand his ground.
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Old 09-28-2018, 08:33 PM
 
Location: New Yawk
9,196 posts, read 7,182,237 times
Reputation: 15313
He’s a kind, easy-going guy... but he’s neither saccharine-sweet nor a pushover.
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Old 09-28-2018, 09:34 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
19,480 posts, read 24,951,822 times
Reputation: 51106
Quote:
Originally Posted by picardlx View Post
I'm all of those things. But I'm not giving up sarcasm. Why is that a negative? It's just a form of humor.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
Some regard it as passive-aggressive humor. Though it depends on what the subject is. But when directed at others in your midst, it's passive-aggressive. My uncle was a psychiatrist, and he and his wife wouldn't allow kids in the family to use it. They considered it rude, not humorous.
IMHO, a little bit of sarcasm, at just the right time can be witty and refreshing. However, many/some people who use sarcasm can use it excessively or use it in a mean way to make fun of other people (of course, I'm not referring to picardlx).
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Old 09-28-2018, 09:50 PM
 
Location: So Cal
19,212 posts, read 15,077,335 times
Reputation: 20215
Yeeaahhh…. that wouldn't work for me. I want a basically good guy, but that leaves a lot of leeway, fun leeway.
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