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Yea, that's pretty deep stuff there. Actual marriage is a place I'm not willing to go again. So my will and testament stands as is. I don't have that much to inherit right now anyway and I don't see that changing. She's certainly not in this for material/monetary gain. Gotta see how this unfolds a bit longer before we get as involved as you are talking about.
One day at a time I'm thinking.
I thought that too. (About marriage.)
My thinking has changed. But we're waiting a while. Probably a few years, yet.
Yeah, that stuff is definitely heavy, too heavy for the early stages. But it's just stuff to have in the back of the mind if things progress on down the line, you know?
Otherwise, I don't have any problems because of the whole age difference thing.
One caveat. She's 20 years younger than me. After some time and after things have developed a bit that is vexing me. We haven't talked about it past telling each other our ages but I have never been involved with someone younger let alone 20 years worth. That's a long time. All the ladies I was ever seriously involved with have been between 2 to 10 years older than me. Just how it worked out.
At any rate I'd like to hear from folks who have been there done that where it went or is going.
Well, my husband's 24 years older than me. We met on an internet forum. He sent me a PM and we just hit it off talking with each other. He also historically was interested in older women so it was unusual for him to have taken a liking to me (I on the other hand tend to gravitate to older people. I think I just have an older mindset--I'm 38 now. The subject that got us talking was about my research in the civil war!). We've been married for two years now and it is going well. We both have religious backgrounds so though this kind of relationship wasn't what either of us had in mind, our belief is that this is what God had for us and we are very grateful to have found each other.
One of my best friends has been married to a man 30 years her senior for 10 years now. She did not marry for love though, she married for security. They are still married and most likely will never divorce, but she has grown resentful of the situation and has cheated on him a couple of times. Pretty sure she'll do it again when/if the opportunity arises. He on the other hand is a pretty active man and he is happy to have a younger and active wife around (she keeps him busy) as long as she doesn't leave him.
Sad, but quite common. Something to consider, regardless of how great the initial meeting went. In some cases it's intended to go great, if you can dig it.
Been bout 3 months and a bit now. Spending most of that time together either at her place or mine and out doing various things.
I'm really amazed that the kids thing hasn't come up yet. It would be easy to drop into a conversation ... "Oh, no more kids for me. I had a vasectomy __ years ago."
Honestly, if you are savvy enough about your personal finances, that would be the only concern I would have.
She knows full well I don't have any righteous bucks stashed away somewhere. Both of us are just living within our means as best we can. Money is a non issue. She does now know that I can't sire any children anymore. It hadn't come up thus far as it turns out she can't have any either. Seems we both had that bouncing around our brains but were just afraid to say anything lest the other indeed be disappointed.
She also knows quite well how devoted I am to my Son so the kids reciprocity came as a bit of a relief to us both. She may change her mind at some point if we don't stay together and she gets involved with someone her own age or close. Time will tell. And she would have to adopt. A pregnancy is not an option for her.
Money and children are just not on her radar. She sure does like to pick my brain though. She is intensly curious about the roughing it life with horses, cattle, wildlife, various plant , shrubs and trees with medicinal use, we both want a good dog me a Corgi her just a good mutt for a pet.
But neither of us lives in a place conducive to that right now. However she can interact with all the above visiting my buddy's ranch and the surrounding open country. We are having a blast. Win lose or draw here we both are currently just enjoying each other.
She knows full well I don't have any righteous bucks stashed away somewhere. Both of us are just living within our means as best we can. Money is a non issue. She does now know that I can't sire any children anymore. It hadn't come up thus far as it turns out she can't have any either. Seems we both had that bouncing around our brains but were just afraid to say anything lest the other indeed be disappointed.
She also knows quite well how devoted I am to my Son so the kids reciprocity came as a bit of a relief to us both. She may change her mind at some point if we don't stay together and she gets involved with someone her own age or close. Time will tell. And she would have to adopt. A pregnancy is not an option for her.
Money and children are just not on her radar. She sure does like to pick my brain though. She is intensly curious about the roughing it life with horses, cattle, wildlife, various plant , shrubs and trees with medicinal use, we both want a good dog me a Corgi her just a good mutt for a pet.
But neither of us lives in a place conducive to that right now. However she can interact with all the above visiting my buddy's ranch and the surrounding open country. We are having a blast. Win lose or draw here we both are currently just enjoying each other.
Excellent, NVPlumber! Excellent.
I am intensely curious too and ask a lot of questions. I would be curious about that too so I understand. I hope you don't get tired of it.
I'm happy for you. Enjoy!
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