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Old 10-24-2018, 03:13 PM
 
271 posts, read 156,737 times
Reputation: 74

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Quote:
Originally Posted by BirdieBelle View Post
I never know what day it is!!!

haha!

at least you know how to give great advice to a girl in need!!

 
Old 10-24-2018, 03:15 PM
 
Location: Bloomington IN
8,590 posts, read 12,288,275 times
Reputation: 24248
Quote:
Originally Posted by palmtrees099 View Post
Well why didnt he try to reassure me about anything if he basically just told me he'd been travelling with one girl since the very beginning
First, once again, he is NOT responsible for controlling your doubts, worries, stress, etc. That is your job.

I don't know any other way to say it that will help you understand except to be very direct: He didn't try to reassure you about anything, because he couldn't. There is a real chance that this girl was more than just a travel companion.
 
Old 10-24-2018, 03:16 PM
 
3,852 posts, read 4,140,301 times
Reputation: 7866
I cannot imagine why someone would voluntarily stay in a relationship with this much angst.
 
Old 10-24-2018, 03:44 PM
 
271 posts, read 156,737 times
Reputation: 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by rrah View Post
First, once again, he is NOT responsible for controlling your doubts, worries, stress, etc. That is your job.

I don't know any other way to say it that will help you understand except to be very direct: He didn't try to reassure you about anything, because he couldn't. There is a real chance that this girl was more than just a travel companion.
Oh god what is the world coming to
I can't believe how confused I am
 
Old 10-24-2018, 04:01 PM
 
Location: interior Alaska
6,895 posts, read 5,829,033 times
Reputation: 23410
Quote:
Originally Posted by palmtrees099 View Post
Oh god what is the world coming to
I can't believe how confused I am
I think on some level, you're enjoying it. Feeding off the drama. I'm unsubscribing this thread - this whole thing is super unhealthy on so many levels.
 
Old 10-24-2018, 08:41 PM
 
1,659 posts, read 1,250,934 times
Reputation: 3615
Quote:
Originally Posted by palmtrees099 View Post
he wouldn't lie to me....
Of course he would... because he knows you don't have any way to prove otherwise.

Don't be a fool. You may not have actual proof but you KNOW in your gut what he's been up to with this other girl for the past month.

There's a sea of red flags here. Don't be color-blind over this situation.
 
Old 10-25-2018, 07:43 AM
exm
 
3,713 posts, read 1,765,533 times
Reputation: 2836
Quote:
Originally Posted by palmtrees099 View Post
he wouldn't lie to me....

he can't even stand it when i make small white lies ... a few times this happened and he was very unforgiving

also, i probably won't be asking him more than once... if i ask him more than once about this girl after he's already given me an answer, then he'll probably think that i don't trust him.. i can't keep on bringing it up, its going to look really bad on my part and like i don't trust him and to be honest the big things is........i still don't know if i do or not!!!

if he gets angry when i ask questions then he'll make it incredibly obvious that something went on, wont he???

That's probably why he wasn't communicating to you. He's having a great time with his vaca GF and the Asian ladies so it's easier not to talk to you.
 
Old 10-25-2018, 08:20 AM
 
888 posts, read 553,691 times
Reputation: 1984
Op, this is my last reply to this thread, way to dysfunctional. But you need to stop focusing on this guy. Just stop. You need to focus on getting you life together, without this guy or any other guy. Until you can be healthy and on your own, working etc, you have nothing to offer anyone. Quite frankly, I don't know how this guy has put up with you this long. And yes, I think you do like all this drama and upset, otherwise why are you there. You are both way too young to even be together this long, you both need to just go and leave, and you especially need to get your life together. You have nothing to offer him or anyone else. If I were to guess I would guess he has stayed this long with you out of obligation/a sense of guilt because you can't take care of yourself.
 
Old 10-25-2018, 09:19 AM
 
2,258 posts, read 1,131,131 times
Reputation: 2836
Quote:
Originally Posted by palmtrees099 View Post
he wouldn't lie to me....

he can't even stand it when i make small white lies ... a few times this happened and he was very unforgiving

also, i probably won't be asking him more than once... if i ask him more than once about this girl after he's already given me an answer, then he'll probably think that i don't trust him.. i can't keep on bringing it up, its going to look really bad on my part and like i don't trust him and to be honest the big things is........i still don't know if i do or not!!!

if he gets angry when i ask questions then he'll make it incredibly obvious that something went on, wont he???
Dont worry about what he says, worry about what he does.

If he has emotionally checked out, he wont be able to hide it, and things will be different when he comes back. Watch closely.

Be prepared. Everyone that has someone emotionally checking out on them says "I know him, he wouldnt lie to me, I know he doesnt have time to see someone else" but it always turns out you were giving him excuses and you were in denial.
 
Old 10-25-2018, 11:06 AM
 
Location: State of Transition
102,126 posts, read 107,381,087 times
Reputation: 115947
Quote:
Originally Posted by hawaiiancoconut View Post
DuH! 99.9% of men that goes down there for "backpacking" isn't going out in landmine-filled jungles to hike Of all the wonderful places to hike in the world, Vietnam just isn't one of them, LOl.

He was there for the "Pho" at the Hanoi Hilton
Interesting point. I wonder why a Bulgarian would pick Vietnam, of all places....
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