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I figured at this point that conversation was a given. But maybe not
You'd be surprised! I've been with guys (mostly in my 20s, dumb and stupid and carefree) and it never came up. But I'm curious to know, all those who are saying they want to know the # of partners, did you have an STD conversation with your partner prior to sleeping together too?
You'd be surprised! I've been with guys (mostly in my 20s, dumb and stupid and carefree) and it never came up. But I'm curious to know, all those who are saying they want to know the # of partners, did you have an STD conversation with your partner prior to sleeping together too?
Truly, can you ever know if another person if lying to you? I could not "know" for sure. But, I will say that if he lied to me, his life would become exponentially more difficult than he could have ever possibly imagined. I loath liars in a way I cannot meaningfully articulate. God is in the business of forgiveness, not me.
Yeah but this doesn't really address what you said, that you don't want to be with a man who is a user of women and thus implied that its important to ask how many partners he's had, in order presumably to know if they he was a user of women.
See how irrelevant knowing the # of past partners can be? And if a man was ashamed of the number, like you said, he could easily lie about it.
I know this will come as a shock but not everyone is you.
Some couples do not share this information cause they don't care to know. Some things are better left unsaid.
I know this may come as shock but I have already said that several times myself to other people.
I don't care you don't want to know about your partners past. I never asked if you did. I have only spoken about my experience, and then tried to understand the comments made by others that make 0 sense to me - not that they need to, but if someone is going to bother to judge someone elses experience, then they should expect a reply on that judgement.
I am not the one jumping in and making judgements about how other people feel. In fact, I AM the one who keeps telling people who think talking with their partner about sex and openly discussing someone's past is 'cringe worthy' that it is okay for them if they feel that way, so you really have no reason to post this to me other than to try to rise to the occasion for a friend.
Yeah but this doesn't really address what you said, that you don't want to be with a man who is a user of women and thus implied that its important to ask how many partners he's had, in order presumably to know if they he was a user of women.
See how irrelevant knowing the # of past partners can be? And if a man was ashamed of the number, like you said, he could easily lie about it.
Look, Level77, why do other people have be to "wrong," for you to be "right?" Your questions are antagonistic in nature, not probative. Give it a rest, please.
I know this may come as shock but I have already said that several times myself to other people.
I don't care you don't want to know about your partners past. I never asked if you did. I have only spoken about my experience, and then tried to understand the comments made by others that make 0 sense to me - not that they need to, but if someone is going to bother to judge someone elses experience, then they should expect a reply on that judgement.
I am not the one jumping in and making judgements about how other people feel. In fact, I AM the one who keeps telling people who think talking with their partner about sex and openly discussing someone's past is 'cringe worthy' that it is okay for them if they feel that way, so you really have no reason to post this to me other than to try to rise to the occasion for a friend.
Well, they see. You have their back! Bravo!
I need to clarify this:
Talking about your past or sex is NOT CRINGE WORTHY in all situations.
I believe, if the motivation to ask your partner how many sex partners they've had is that you just had great sex with them in bed, that is gross to me. I can't imagine just having sex with someone and it was great sex, and then the guy says to me, WOW, WHERE'D YOU LEARN THAT? How many people have you been with?
Gross!!! I just had sex with you and am trying to bond, and now you want me to talk about other people I've had sex with? I would never sleep with that man again.
Look, Level77, why do other people have be to "wrong," for you to be "right?" Your questions are antagonistic in nature, not probative. Give it a rest, please.
If you are getting tired of the discussion, you don't have to reply.
STDs are what's important and I'm surprised so few people have mentioned that here!
Seems like we all want to be reassured by the number or sexual partners but not STDs?
Now THAT is what my partner and I spoke about. We had sex after we committed to each other. He told me I have nothing to worry about and I told him, he doesn't either.
Now that is what is important. Not how may people he's slept with.
I mentioned it a couple of pages back. I have done a test prior to - every time. Even back in the early 1990s when I met my first wife. We both went together.
My current girlfriend, we both did it and showed the results to the other.
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