Quote:
Originally Posted by moongirl00
He has been harassing me for over a year. He moved across country thousands of miles to my town...small town. I filed police report months ago and we had our court hearing for the restraining order a few days ago because he was coming to my house despite my saying not to. I called police, he got served.
The judge let the restraining order go through but the guy is still in my town. He said in court he was going to stay, the judge said he was welcome to.
I dont have anyone to talk about it with. I had a friend I was emailing but he got weird about it. I dont want to email him anymore. He is not taking it seriously.
This has been very frightening. The stalker has talked about wanting to kidnap me. He is deranged. All the authorities are taking me seriously but I am living in fear now.
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Oh my goodness. moongirl00, I am so very sorry this is happening to you. I wish I could say or do something to help you. I know and understand you feel great and overwhelming fear and helplessness. If you can, try to quiet your mind and focus on ways and things you can do to make and keep yourself safe. That will help ease your fear and help prepare you should your stalker escalate.
Here are some things to consider doing:
1. Contact all of your close neighbors and let them know what is happening, that you are being stalked, what the guy looks like and drives and ask them to call the police if they see him.
2. Ask a family member and/or friend to call you periodically, at set times throughout the day (and maybe night), to make sure you are safe and okay. Have an agreed upon "
safe word" or phrase that you say to them in the event you are not able to talk freely and need help. For example, "Did Fluffy's surgery go okay?"
3. Always keep your cell phone and bluetooth fully charged in case of emergency.
4. Carry a second cell phone on you in a place difficult for him to find.
5. Find ways to reinforce your windows and doors so it is more difficult for him to break in (look online for suggestions). Also, place boards or furniture in front of your doors so you will hear if someone is trying to break in.
6. Get a security system for your home. You can install a security system that you can monitor while you are away.
7. Install motion security lights around your home.
8. Be very aware of whether he is following you. Look around and always be vigilant, night and day.
9. If he is following you, drive to the police station or a fire station and repeatedly honk your horn.
10. Before you go home, drive around your block or complex to see if he is parked somewhere or walking around.
11. Do not have
any contact with him, ever. If you do, that will reinforce his delusions and incentivize him to continue pursuing you.
12. Call The National Domestic Violence Hotline, (800) 799-7233, and ask them for tips they have to help make you safe. They have very useful tips and information. The hotline is available 24/7.
13. Minimize the lights you have on in your house at night because he may be able to see in, but you cannot see out.
I know you're afraid. Try to calm yourself a bit and think through this. Knowledge and a plan are very empowering.
I am thinking of you.
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