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I don’t know... isn’t it preferable to most people to try to stay married even if they feel like they’re settling in some way, or multiple ways?
It sounds like you two should not have gotten married in the first place but should have at least tried just dating in the same city. Yet here you are ....
It is far from ideal for you to seek a divorce while pregnant. It is, in fact, a nightmare. But your husband has shown himself to be a lovable loser who not only shoves his insufficiencies off on you but also will most likely be just like a second dependent once your baby is born.
So what are your options? What would he do if you told him you are seeking sole custody? Would he even care?
I get the feeling from your posts, though, that 11 months from now you will still be with him, frustrated and overwhelmed.
There is something so not believable about this story, but if it is indeed your life, then you will need to start issuing some ultimatums.
It is far from ideal for you to seek a divorce while pregnant. It is, in fact, a nightmare. But your husband has shown himself to be a lovable loser who not only shoves his insufficiencies off on you but also will most likely be just like a second dependent once your baby is born.
Really? because it doesn't make me feel so upset. I would like to have space and freedom and independence
Really? because it doesn't make me feel so upset. I would like to have space and freedom and independence
You will lose all that when the baby gets here anyway.
You will be working full time and caring for a newborn. You also will be sleep-deprived. If he is there, he will be contributing to the mess and stress but not helping with the workload, based on what you've said about him.
Having been there myself, with three kids, I was surprised at how little of my time was truly my own, and how often my thoughts had to include others. You aren't going to have space or freedom, but if you were divorced you could at least have independence, I guess.
I have doubted your threads from the beginning, but this post takes the cake. What is your point? Are you trying to teach this guy you married the ultimate lesson?
I have doubted your threads from the beginning, but this post takes the cake. What is your point? Are you trying to teach this guy you married the ultimate lesson?
How far along are you? And how old are you?
6 months, and I'm 29.
I just don't want to deal with him whining and resenting not going to City X forever. Just be immature and selfish and go already. And think you will give the baby a good life. I just want to be done with all of this dram.a
6 months, and I'm 29.
I just don't want to deal with him whining and resenting not going to City X forever. Just be immature and selfish and go already. And think you will give the baby a good life. I just want to be done with all of this dram.a
How do you really think he will give the baby a good life???
Have you considered placing the baby for adoption? It doesn't read like you're ready to be a mom.
How do you really think he will give the baby a good life???
Have you considered placing the baby for adoption? It doesn't read like you're ready to be a mom.
He will NOT. As he's already described, it'll be daycare by day, nanny by night. But my other option is to insist the baby stay here, which I know is best for the baby (and me), at which point if my husband stays too then he'll just be angrier and more resentful than he already is -- he tells me I'm "ruining his life" by keeping him from going to City X. That's a nice peaceful life without drama... Either way.
He will NOT. As he's already described, it'll be daycare by day, nanny by night. But my other option is to insist the baby stay here, which I know is best for the baby (and me), at which point if my husband stays too then he'll just be angrier and more resentful than he already is -- he tells me I'm "ruining his life" by keeping him from going to City X. That's a nice peaceful life without drama... Either way.
And sooooo ... what do you WANT to happen ideally?
You need solo counseling. That's all I can offer you now.
You're in a crisis, and you need professional guidance to make the right decision because your posts are all over the place.
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