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Based on the OP's own posts of an ideal relationship that involves a woman spending all of her time with him and not having any outside interests or relationships with friends or family. Perhaps that's appealing to some, but I feel smothered just reading about it in the abstract.
It's also not what a real loner or introvert would like or want. Introverts need space. Even from loved ones.
Basically, he wants a woman with the personality of a dog. That's what my dog is like. No doggie friends, no doggie family, and hangs around me all the time (even follows me into the bathroom or cries at the door if I shut it).
Based on the OP's own posts of an ideal relationship that involves a woman spending all of her time with him and not having any outside interests or relationships with friends or family. Perhaps that's appealing to some, but I feel smothered just reading about it in the abstract.
Honestly, while do like to spend a lot of time with an SO, I also understand the importance of having space.
You know what they say, too much of a good thing...
3 questions if somebodynew or anyone else can answer.
1.Do you know any men or women with terrible attitudes toward the sex they want to date who nonetheless attract and have relationships with lots of people?
Sure. Not all terrible attitudes are dating enders. I don't know what other people are talking about. But attitude one is the idea of rejection. You see it start when kids start playing the dating game in early high school. The kids who express interest and get turned down and do not internalize REJECTION express more confidence outwardly, likely because they ARE more confidence. Confidence is attractive. If a person takes that someone doesn't want to go out with them as a REJECTION (of any more than an offer of an outing) is can't help but feel like a reflection on them. (Side story. My DD was interested in a boy. He was expressing interest in her in his actions but then went out with someone else. Her first instinct was to wonder why she was not good enough. <I cringed to myself.> She then realized that that was stupid. That she was not going to let someone not going out with her affect her sense of self worth.) We know that confidence is attractive. But no matter how people yell I am WORTHY online, when they use the rejection language and wind up hating the "rejector", they have piled two highly unattractive attitudes together/
The second attraction killer attitude is that of wanting to "get" a date / partner where the concern never really gets to who that PERSON is. Basing this want on shallow things like looks (theirs being important and theirs being the excuse for why they aren't "getting). This attitude seeps through communication and is nearly obviously cringey to the target. Oh aren't I special? I am one of the 30 people who meet the category female in your hunt today, just one in your acquisition numbers game. I don't care how well a person thinks they are writing articulate OLD messages, this attitude reeks through. And the plonks follow.
I HATE the Chad attitude. The red pills stuff makes me crazy. I would never go out with one of these guys. On purpose. One cannot escape that if what you want is to play like a playah, some of this stuff "works". The ones who are good at it actually look pretty decent at first. Like narcissists, their charm hides their stuff until later. This is an example of a terrible attitude that needn't be a dating killer.
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2.Do you know any men or women who are fine people but who struggle to find love, painfully and beyond the normal, expected struggles?
Given that I think almost all people are "fine people", I find that question is easy to answer yes to. But I see nothing about being "fine" that means datable.
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3.Is it conceivable that a person can be embittered, as unwise as that is to let happen, as a result of their very difficult experience and not as the cause of it?
Of COURSE it is conceivable to be embittered. We see it all the time. Who even cares about cause? The notion that cause is the thing is part of the broken thinking processes. Is the people who did not go out with the embittered person the cause? Of course not. They have very right to go out with whomever they want, and not to with whomever they don't. Maybe the sun is the cause. Cuz it's there. Why is blame/cause even a consideration? The person feeling the suffering has the power to make a change in a way that is going to be mentally and emotionally healthy whether it yields the love of their life or not. Seems like a straight win to me.
Based on the OP's own posts of an ideal relationship that involves a woman spending all of her time with him and not having any outside interests or relationships with friends or family. Perhaps that's appealing to some, but I feel smothered just reading about it in the abstract.
3 questions if somebodynew or anyone else can answer.
1.Do you know any men or women with terrible attitudes toward the sex they want to date who nonetheless attract and have relationships with lots of people?
2.Do you know any men or women who are fine people but who struggle to find love, painfully and beyond the normal, expected struggles?
3.Is it conceivable that a person can be embittered, as unwise as that is to let happen, as a result of their very difficult experience and not as the cause of it?
1 and 2
I'm not sure I know any of them personally, but I do know of them and there are plenty of them out there.
3. That's an of course for me.
In the case of number 3, it becomes a vicious cycle.
All the times I myself have been "kidnapped" within the last couple of years. Some of my friends had "kidnappers" as well.
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