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As a widow who is turning 64 tomorrow I have not let myself go at all. I'm probably in better shape now than I was in my late 40's. I go to the gym regularly and keep up with a good haircut, make-up and I don't wear old lady clothes.
Add that to my family genes where we all look at least 10 years younger than we are. Most of the guys my age look old and only one has been physically fit. It is not easy finding a fit, athletic type single guy once you hit your 60's. I've almost given up. I've been talking to one guy a few years older who has a slight beer gut but he stays active with sports and there may be a connection there. Too soon to tell at this point.
I've been talking to one guy a few years older who has a slight beer gut but he stays active with sports and there may be a connection there. Too soon to tell at this point.
May as well go for at least a night out for dinner...why not, right? Nothing to lose. :-)
We went to lunch a few weeks ago but then he went out of town for the holidays. We've kept in touch though and will probably get together again after New Year's.
Being in that age group myself, I can agree with what is being said.
I am in better shape now than I was in my 20's and 30's -- same weight but much more muscle tone and definition -- thanks to the past 6 years (and ongoing, for the rest of my life) strength training; and a change to a plant-based diet. This has become a dating liability in three ways:
1.) I have become a "fitness snob," judging potential partners harshly. She does not have to be as fit as me, or even close to it, but she must at least be taking good care of herself *consistently* -- both in diet and exercise.
2.) Many women in my age group have become much less interested in me because they sense the above expectation.
3.) Younger women have become much more interested in me, but I am not interested in them.
So my options are very, very limited.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThisTown123
This could be a touchy subject, but I saw this post on the POF forums...
The very last one where he expressed how dating in your LATE 40s and 50s can be diffucult as there is not a divide between the 2 where people just choose to let themselves go vs. those who decided that they NEED to stay fit and eat healthy.
There is also a problem for those late 40s' - 50s (of both sexes) that have taken care of themselves and look good. And that problem is they expect someone who, likewise, has taken care of themselves and look good, but we all know that once you hit late 40's those folks become rare.
Most people are content to just let themselves go. That is if you're looking at the same age range. So that's another thing you have going against you because it looks like you're in good shape and maintained your looks
Late 40s are pretty much the turning point where your metabolism starts to slow and you can no longer eat sugary sweets and such and still burn them off while barely walking like you did in your 20s or 30s.
Some haven gifted with the YOUTH gene where you look young for a 50 year old, whereas everyone else, looks their age (50).
So I was wondering for those of you out there that had reached that age that decided to keep maintaining your health, how many of you finding it hard to find a healthy partner about that age? I hear that healthy women in their 50s tend to complain about all they keep meeting is men that have beer guts that are the size of a 9 mos pregnant woman. Some of these men are pretty much inactive, too.
Being in that age group myself, I can agree with what is being said.
I am in better shape now than I was in my 20's and 30's -- same weight but much more muscle tone and definition -- thanks to the past 6 years (and ongoing, for the rest of my life) strength training; and a change to a plant-based diet. This has become a dating liability in three ways:
1.) I have become a "fitness snob," judging potential partners harshly. She does not have to be as fit as me, or even close to it, but she must at least be taking good care of herself *consistently* -- both in diet and exercise.
2.) Many women in my age group have become much less interested in me because they sense the above expectation.
3.) Younger women have become much more interested in me, but I am not interested in them.
So my options are very, very limited.
That's too much pressure. It sounds like you would be best to limit yourself to meeting gym rats and others with a full blown fitness based lifestyle.
I've been more fit and less fit, either way it didn't affect who I liked.
Being in that age group myself, I can agree with what is being said.
I am in better shape now than I was in my 20's and 30's -- same weight but much more muscle tone and definition -- thanks to the past 6 years (and ongoing, for the rest of my life) strength training; and a change to a plant-based diet. This has become a dating liability in three ways:
1.) I have become a "fitness snob," judging potential partners harshly. She does not have to be as fit as me, or even close to it, but she must at least be taking good care of herself *consistently* -- both in diet and exercise.
2.) Many women in my age group have become much less interested in me because they sense the above expectation.
3.) Younger women have become much more interested in me, but I am not interested in them.
So my options are very, very limited.
I could have written the same, and it did limit my dating options. I had lost my first husband to a heart attack at a young age, he didn't exercise and had poor eating habits. I was not interested in going through that again.
My current husband was in excellent physical shape but his diet tended towards keto, and I tend towards vegetarian.
Diet settled into a happy medium, and he will pretty much happily eat what I put in front of him. His cholesterol came down with the change in diet.
I think being similar in diet and exercise is good for a marriage (it is for ours). We go to the gym together, exercise the dogs, go on bike rides, hike and I love to cook.
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That's too much pressure. It sounds like you would be best to limit yourself to meeting gym rats and others with a full blown fitness based lifestyle.
I've been more fit and less fit, either way it didn't affect who I liked.
Basically. Also expanding my range of options beyond my current physical type(s). And also considering the real possibility of not being involved in anymore relationships.
I also can like someone who does not conform to my standards, but only for a short time. (Just being honest.)
Remarkable how food will be the ultimate determinant of compatibility. Which is fine with me since, if she is on a proper diet, exercise will be much less of an issue.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mikala43
I could have written the same, and it did limit my dating options. I had lost my first husband to a heart attack at a young age, he didn't exercise and had poor eating habits. I was not interested in going through that again.
My current husband was in excellent physical shape but his diet tended towards keto, and I tend towards vegetarian.
Diet settled into a happy medium, and he will pretty much happily eat what I put in front of him. His cholesterol came down with the change in diet.
I think being similar in diet and exercise is good for a marriage (it is for ours). We go to the gym together, exercise the dogs, go on bike rides, hike and I love to cook.
Remarkable how food will be the ultimate determinant of compatibility. Which is fine with me since, if she is on a proper diet, exercise will be much less of an issue.
I actually use food as a determining factor for a lot of things. I would probably stay away from anyone who was strictly a steak and potato type of person, someone who considered Chinese food "too ethnic" and that type (not specifically those criteria).
Even when looking for a retirement location I would go on Yelp to see what type of restaurants they had, and if it were all Diners and Steakhouses it gave me a good idea of the type of people there.
I'm not against a good steak, I just love fresh food well prepared, a variety of spices, farmer's markets, and cuisines.
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Which is fine with me since, if she is on a proper diet, exercise will be much less of an issue. 
