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I have been dating a married woman for almost three years.
I met Renee in 1991, she was a single mother and our neighbor. I was married with three small children. We just hit it off, she became a good friend, baby sitter etc. Our children played together, we talked and enjoyed each other's company. She was the most beautiful woman I have ever seen, a former model very tall, very thin and graceful. Men are attracted to her, she would light up a room when she enters, yes one of those type of ladies.
Renee ended up moving, she rented one of my grandmother's condos and at times I would go over and fix or repair things.
About three years later my job transferred me from San Diego to Richmond VA. About a week before we moved she confessed her love to me, I was shocked cause I am just some average guy. I was happily seduced several times before I moved, I justified it in my head cause I was moving, my bad.
So i move back east, two years later she marries a guy in the military and moves to Florida. In 1998 I move back to San Diego. We chat once or twice a year and sent Christmas cards to one another.
In 2005 her family and her five kids move back to San Diego. We talked a few times compared notes on how our kids were doing.
In March of 2016 I got divorced, three months later I looked up Renee, she files for a legal seperation from her husband. I was thinking wow, this is great news. Someone I use to know, someone I knew that I liked was in the same situation as me.
In July we have lunch and begin to talk on the phone. She wants a divorce but wants to wait until Feb 2018 when her twins turn 18 to actually file.
In August we have lunch, it has been twenty years since I have seen her, guess what she is prettier now, serious I don't know how this is even possible. Five foot Nine, blonde, 120 pounds, she is still stunning.
We start dating however she wants to keep it secret until she is ready, so we joined a bowling league and bowl twice a week and date in secret. Okay, she is seperated however still living together with her spouse, renee tells me to be patient.
In Feb she is not quite ready and asks for another year, Feb 2019
In August 2018 someone sends an anonmyous note to her husband letting him know whats going on, he shows up at the bowling alley, we deny everything, she is not allowed to bowl or talk to me anymore. She gets a burner phone and calls me, begs me to hang in there and wait until spring 2019. In October we start up again however I cannot see her but a couple times a month, before it was a couple times a week.;
What happens when spring comes and she still has not left her husband? What the hell have I got myself into. I am totally in love, I have known her for almost 30 years. I know she is not playing me, I know she loves me. It kills me inside knowing she is still married.
She isn't leaving her husband. And she isn't "separated" from him if she is still living with him and he can exercise control over where she goes and who she sees.
If she loves you so much, why is she lying to you? She and her husband are still a couple. If they were over but still living under the same roof, he would not be coming down to the bowling alley to check on the two of you.
She is stringing you along and you are allowing it. She has had you waiting for years to be with her, she has five kids, and she has managed to get you to join a bowling league to have a "secret" affair. She's playing you and she's playing her husband. Sounds to me like you need to test her.
Confront her in FRONT of her husband. All out on the table, everything. I bet he would be very shocked to find out they were separated.
Do it. You need peace of mind. You need to know the truth.
She is stringing you along and you are allowing it. She has had you waiting for years to be with her, she has five kids, and she has managed to get you to join a bowling league to have a "secret" affair. She's playing you and she's playing her husband. Sounds to me like you need to test her.
Confront her in FRONT of her husband. All out on the table, everything. I bet he would be very shocked to find out they were separated.
Do it. You need peace of mind. You need to know the truth.
I think that's a good idea. But why is she stringing him around even a little bit? Meeting him is very risky. I think she has real doubts about her marriage, or it's probably a sexless marriage by now (most likely).
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